Within the last few years, my cousins and some friends have taken the bold step and got married. It is at these weddings that speculation/ interest has risen in my friend and i, and we are constantly asked when it will be 'our turn' and often it's by the same people!! It is beginning to get on our nerves...We have given tactful responses, is it now time to be rude?!!
2007-07-28 16:00:47 · 14 answers · asked by shaani 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Once you do finally get married it will be "when are you having kids" and then "when are you having another kid"
I think all 3 questions are rude! But if it's family, sometimes you just need to grin and bear it.
If it is close family then I would say hey get off my back (Maybe in a nicer way). You don't have to be rude but definitely say something to et them know to knock it off!
Unfortunatly I think most people have to deal with this same thing! Just don't let anyone push you into anything you are not ready for. Maybe a response like "we will let you know when we are ready" will give them the picture.
Good luck!
2007-07-28 16:06:49 · answer #1 · answered by Reba 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The same thing happens to me. My boyfriend and I have been dating for 3 years. This is a constant comment at weddings and holidays.
I simply laugh and say, "I don't know" in a playful way. Usually make light of the situation or cracking humor takes the conversation from people's serious questions to a joke. Usually after that, people change the subject.
The question is, Do you plan on marrying this person? If so, make a plan of what to say. Say something like, "Well when we are done w/ school or when I get that big promotion, then we will discuss marriage."
2007-07-28 16:06:39 · answer #2 · answered by Answer Girl 2007 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is never the time to be rude. It is now time to be vague and disarming.
When they ask, look mildly surprised and ask 'oh goodness, there's plenty of time for that', and then change the subject. Or you could say 'I'll let you know when I do' with a broad smile...and again change the subject.
Yes, it's annoying, but short of telling your own relatives to stick large objects up small, inapropriate orifices, there's really no way to entirely stop them, and it's not worth the family uproar when you give your grandmother a heart attack.
Do your best to grin and bear it, and then remember how you feel now so you can break the toxic cycle in the next generation.
2007-07-28 18:36:21 · answer #3 · answered by gileswench 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They are the rude ones. No need to stoop to their level. Maybe say something cute, like that's what you said last time at "so and so's" wedding. Maybe one of these days you'll be right. Just grin and bear it, and know not to do that to anyone else.
People are going to ask bizarre rude questions and not even realize they are doing it. Unfortunately you just have to deal with them gracefully. After being married for 2 years its "so when are you having kids?" I want to say "none of your damn business" but I haven't. It's because I have had a miscarriage that pretty much no one knows about and I cringe when people ask. I generally brush them off by saying not now.
Hang in there.
2007-07-28 16:28:45 · answer #4 · answered by JM 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ITs rude. Those kind of people ask anything and lowering yourself to be rude back goes right over their head. They do not know etiquette. It really doesnt matter what you say back. They arent listening. You could smile or just look back at them or make a joke or ask a question back saying ' Are you enjoying the wedding"? like diversionary speech.
2007-07-28 16:09:32 · answer #5 · answered by barthebear 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I get this too! When they ask "when are you getting married?" why don't you tell them "when your paying for it!".
My cousins have bets on me being 'next', which is a fair call. I tell them if i win the money for them they have to take me out for drinks!
Overall don't let it bother you, just think when you are married they will start on "when are you having a baby?"
2007-07-29 02:26:32 · answer #6 · answered by Stiffler 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been married for almost 14 years and if one more person asks me when I'm going to have a baby, I might hit them. Just tell not to hold their breath.
2007-07-28 18:28:55 · answer #7 · answered by maigen_obx 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why would you want to be rude to people at a wedding? Just smile, shrug and if you must speak, say something polite or get religious and say "God only knows" with a smile.
2007-07-28 18:37:09 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I just laughed it off until I actually was the next one to get married
2007-07-28 17:51:25 · answer #9 · answered by Toni 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
people just get excited about weddings/babies etc. just smile and be like oh i don't know. when my fiance and i were first dating, I was 19 and we had been dating for 5 months, we went to our friends wedding and people were asking us. it kind of freaked me out, but i got over it.
2007-07-28 16:57:00 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋