My mom's a real big b*tch. I have 4 other little siblings and she keeps telling me that everything's my fault. my siblings are 9,7,4, and 2. i'm 14. she keeps calling me a retard and tells me that i need therapy, and we just moved into a new house. all of my friends think that she's super nice when... she's abusive and mean. she sent me to miller dwan and then took me out a DAY LATER cuz she wanted me back home to do CHORES. i wanted to stay there and was begging her to let me stay, and she went against the doctor's reccommendations (to keep me there) and she's... 33. AND she has a new slutty boyfriend named John and she wants me to be a bridesmaid for her wedding but i hate both of them so much that i said no, and now she hates me even more. how do i make her back off, or even better, have a GOOD relationship with her?
2007-07-28 08:05:29 · 9 answers · asked by MaddyMakeout™ 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Of course, its only fair to do chores since you are part of the family but to demand it so abusively is unacceptable. See what fustrates her, maybe all the responsibilities she needs to take care of are causing her to be so negative.
If you are up to the challenge, be the one to offer help instead of being called to do work. In fact, do work just because it needs to be done. That way, hopefully, she will realize that she may be taking you for granted and be nicer to you or even say tahnk you. You probably wont get an instant positive response right away but if you want to break the bad cycle between you two, then someone has to make the first step.
Having a good relationship means more th an just being nice to each other. There needs something to be nice about - like a managable life where chores arent left undone and where everyone works together. If she doesnt come to realize it, then at least you know what it takes to make a family work and will benefit you in the future.
2007-07-28 08:14:24 · answer #1 · answered by leikevy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're mom is calling you a retard as well as you calling her a b*tch, maybe you two should look into counseling that the both of you can attend together. Sometimes it takes a third party to shed some light on a situation as it seems the two of you don't give one another a chance in order to have a good relationship.
Just remember, by you using verbally abusive names such as sl*tty, doesn't make you any better than she is.
Good luck!
2007-07-28 09:56:31 · answer #2 · answered by christyn79 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your mom sounds pretty mean but if you want to bond I suggest you gather all of the family photos you can find and try doing a scrap book together this way you can spend time together reflecting on good memories and maybe have a few laughs together to ease the tension between you. Talk to her and tell her you want to be close with her and that you don't try to be difficult and you want to make this family work.
2007-07-28 08:13:44 · answer #3 · answered by LILLIE K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweety, you're screwed. You're an unpaid slave, and she's not going to give that up anytime soon. You have any other adults that might stand up for you? Anywhere else you might can live? It's tough, because if you leave, your brothers & sisters don't have anyone loving to care for them anymore. Sign up on the dr. phil show website. Maybe he'll bring you and the family on and things will change.
2007-07-28 08:12:55 · answer #4 · answered by TX Mom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
spend some time with her. just you and her. no one else. go shopping, go grocery shopping with her, or anything. dont talk about the bad stuff when you're with her. look at the good aspects you both share. when she tells you to do something do it. dont argue....that's what makes matters worse. respect her because she loves you. she's your only mother. and being the oldest means you have to be the role model, you take more responsibilities. you're the person the younger look up to and a helper to your mother. you mother can't do everything on her own. thats why your there....she depends on you.
2007-07-28 08:31:28 · answer #5 · answered by elle 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
try and get your mom to be alone with you for a few minutes and explain what she is doing to you.
The blaming you with the siblings thing is a part of being the oldest.
2007-07-28 08:10:16 · answer #6 · answered by raynor4000 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
man this is going to sound weird but u just got to pray and hope god listens to ur prayer
2007-07-28 08:09:16 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You two should try XTC together. Have a nice talk while you're blowing up. I think it could help. LOL
2007-07-28 08:12:28 · answer #8 · answered by klorraine25 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Oh please, your mom does not call you a retard. You are just some angry child who doesn't get everthing they want and you think that makes your parents bad.
2007-07-28 08:08:16 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋