If you found out your engagement ring was financed would you make him pick a ring he could afford?

Question

Previous question sparked this....

Financing a ring and financing a house are two completely diff. things....homes build equity. A ring does not.

Financing a car...actually I don't. Again, cars don't have equity or appreciate in value. I own my car free and clear and make payments on it to "myself" and when I decide I don't want it anymore I'll be paying cash for the next one too.

Answer 1

If he financed it because he couldn't afford it and would have difficulty making the payments then yes I would ask him to return it and get me a simpler ring. I don't like big stones anyway and don't like diamonds that much so if he had to finance a stone of my choice and couldnt afford it, it would have to be enormous and I wouldn't want that.

Answer 2

The first answer is right. Financing does not mean you can't afford something. Also financing is how you build up your credit--most rings are financed with a monthly payment amount that you have paid off shortly. After all, most cars/houses are financed too. You wish to pick a car that you can afford but that doesn't mean a car that you can drop off cash for every cent on the day of signing. Those people that believe you cannot buy anything you can't pay cash for, do not build up a high credit rating which actually hurts your chance at getting a nicer house later on.

Now yes if my husband were purchasing a ring that was way outside our budget I would ask him to consider our financial situation and explain that I would prefer a less expensive ring.

However I do dislike the way you say "make him". My husband is a man and I don't control him, nor make decisions for him. He still has the choice on what he wants to buy me.

But I would also not demand a ring that was out of our budget either. However, the ring should be a choice made between the two of you and if you already have such a strong disagreement over money--it doesn't bode well.

Answer 3

Has anyone priced engagement rings lately. Even the $2,500 - 3,000 range are not extravagant. A lot of men would have a hard time paying that amount of cash, and holding some back for starting life on a different level. A $1,000 ring would almost be laughable to other women.

Answer 4

I actually did that. When my husband and I got together, I was younger and dumber then, he was in debt up to his eyeballs. He had just purchased my ring when I found out about his debt. I still married him (though we really should have waited) but instead of the $1000 ring he originally bought I convinced him to not have one. I finally got my ring for our 5th anniversary after his credit was paid off. I don't recommend anyone carrying any unnecessary debt to begin a marriage (including for the wedding). The first few years are hard enough without adding financial worries from the beginning.

Answer 5

I would be respectful of his finances no matter what the situation. Any woman who expects a man to go into debt so she can have a bigger, shinier ring is getting married for the wrong reasons and is too immature.

Answer 6

I would have to know if he is paying interest and if so, at what rate. It might not be smart to pay 29.99% interest, but if he was paying it off interest free, then he is smart to use other people's money and pay it off over time. This is the way to make money, as you are not pulling it out of a bank that pays interest or incurring interest via a credit card.

P.S. Some credit cards are also offering no or very low interest for the first few months or year that you have the card.

Answer 7

well, with that train of thought, many of us would not have cars or have medical procedures. while we all might have some money, we can not spend it all on one thing. it is easier to make payments just in case something happens. for instances my husband could have paid off my computer, but decided to keep making payments and put some into savings. then all four of my wisdom teeth had to be pulled. so instead of paying off the computer with the lower interest rate, he paid the dentist with the higher.

personally he financed mine and that was fine with me.

Answer 8

If I knew quickly enough and it could be returned, yes. Some guys just don't realize stuff, no matter how mature they are.
I did this once when, once married, my husband bought a fancy ring and pendant (and he knew I like a longer chain, so he bought an additional longer gold chain as well) for my birthday one year. Once I found out he took out a jewellery store credit card for it, the items went back. I returned them myself - and the sales manager was so baffled - she said, well he really wanted to treat you right. I told her NOT THAT WAY!

Answer 9

Financing it doesn't mean that he couldn't afford it. Most men don't have thousands of dollars sitting around and it might be more economical for him to pay it back in monthly payments. Not all jewelers even charge interest.

Answer 10

I would be upset if my ring were financed. If he financed like $10000 I would make him take it back. If only $1000 or so, I'd yell at him, but probably keep it.