Military relationships...Well, relationships, period.?

Question

I'm in a "Military" relationship, which means there's long periods of time that I don't see my Love...

So many people automatically assume that I'm going to cheat. They act like I'm weird, because I don't think about it...and find it repulsive that others do.

Is it really that inconceivable for someone to wait for the one they love?

To be faithful both emotionally and physically?

Also, why is it that more Military men assume that women cheat more so, than them?

My honey told me that it's more common for the wives/girlfriends to cheat, than the men.

I don't see how this is. It's probably very lopsided, since he hears horror stories from other guys.

And, I hear stories about both genders cheating. Military men and their wives.

I just don't see how people are so lost and unable to love someone enough to never consider unfaithfulness.

Any thoughts on this matter?

I meant faithfulness*

Answer 1

Don't let people influence your decision about being true to your love one...There is a lot of temptation when it involves military relationships...because of seperations thru deployments, school, training, tdy and so forth. I have been married to mine for a while and a while is too many when you've went pass your 10 fingers. I have to say I'm lucky to be married to a soldier that shares the same idea about being faithful to one another..The decision will come down to both of you...will your love be strong enough to withstand any temptation that will come along... The stories are true, but hey that can happen anywhere whether it's a military environment or not. And you can tell your honey it's not the women/girlfriends who do most of the cheating?? Even people in the military do the cheating too.

A friend of mine said something like some guy in her husband's unit was cheating or fooling around with another soldier in Iraq and this guy's wife and kids are just like any other military family waiting patiently for them to come home and he's in Iraq doing all of this...so even in the midst of war people are cheating even if they happen to be in the military as well. That wasn't to discourage you, but to inform you, so you can be aware of what you're getting into.

If I can do it you can too...So good luck be strong, and keep the faith....

Answer 2

I'm in the same boat. My husband is a marine, and I hear insinuations all the time that I MUST have cheated on him at some point. The problem is, it IS very common for military wives to cheat. Don't get me wrong, the husbands do it too. But if you're in Iraq for seven months with hundreds of guys and only a handful of women, you don't have that much of an opportunity. It's pretty common for military members to get married young, and in a hurry. They see that they're going to Iraq or Afghanistan or wherever, run home for the weekend to have a quick wedding before they leave, and bring her back with him. So she's 18, stuck in a new city with no friends, lonely, and bored. She starts to resent her husband, and after a few months finds someone else. That's not how it always works, but it happened a LOT when my husband was at Camp Lejeune. So my point is that while it isn't acceptable to make such assumptions, at least it's understandable. As long as your husband/boyfriend/whatever he is trusts you, that's all that matters.

Answer 3

There are times when military men get into relationships for the wrong reasons. I have seen many people get married when I question if it is for love or for the extra money or just getting out of the barracks. In turn, these people are more likely to stray while away from each other for extended periods of time. Since the military families are concentrated in certain areas throughout the states it is quite common to see girls out about the town while their husbands are gone. My wife and I just moved from a town that was mostly military, luckily we have a very loving relationship because many men would "hit" on her with no respect for the ring. They were just so used to seeing women stray that they think it is worth a shot.

It looks like theresacrider and I have experienced the same town and understand a little better.

Answer 4

Stay faithful. My baby is at basic training now and I will be leaving in a few weeks. That means 9 weeks apart plus more weeks apart due to AIT. But in the mist of that you have to realize that you won't be apart forever. If he is a good man, then you have nothing to worry about because he will know better than to cheat on you, so together, if you really want the relationship to work, you will know in your heart that you two are meant for each other. In the end when you do see each other again, there will be sparks flying and you can rekindle your love. But don't be blinded by love, because you or him may slip up.

Answer 5

When someone is deployed for a long time, some women can't wait for their man, and find a Jody. I'm with you honey, Stay faithful and don't let anyone make you feel "strange" for doing that. I dated my hubby the first three years he was a Marine, and never did I want to cheat on him. When we got married, some of the girls made me feel like a freak for not wanting some loving from another man. Hang in there girl! It's worth the wait!

Answer 6

My husband and I have been apart since April. He is in Ft.wainwright Alaska and I am with his family waiting for him. He flies in this coming saturday. We talk every night and we both trust each other completely. This isnt the first time we have been apart. He has been to Korea for 3 wks, Texas for 3.5 months, Anchorage, Alaska for 3wks, Korea for 2 wks, Anchorage for 1 month, and the list keeps going. I am an Army wife and I hear lots and see lots of cheating on post. My close friend cheated on her hubby the whole 16 months he was deployed. We arnt friends anymore...ITs just how each spouse intakes seperation...does it mean get a sitter and go find a one nighter? Or does it mean hold the FORT down til my man comes back? To me, I hold down the fort....alot through out the years. GodBless and to all the military wives holding down thier fort....we are the great military wives!!

Answer 7

Honestly, I know a lot of wives that have cheated, but I know just as many of the soldiers who have cheated as well. My husband constantly has guys telling him it's not that hard to cheat on me, why doesn't he just try it?

Personally, we've both been faithful through a LOT of seperation. And there are a lot of couples out there who are - it's just that you hear more about the ones that aren't. Gossiping about the faithful wives is boring, it's the cheating ones who get the most press.

Answer 8

Hold your head up high and be proud. That you are being faithful to him is probably the best support he can get.

The reason he thinks (and probably why everybody else does too) that military wives cheat is because it's drilled into his head from the day he steps off the bus in basic, till the day he steps off the bus into your arms. A lie told often enough becomes the truth. At least in the mind. Don't let it become the truth in your life. Keep yourself for him and be proud of his service.

Answer 9

no its a fact many of people not just men or women but military lifestyle they will cheat on there loved ones there are also many out there that dont cheat too.

the military life has the higest divorce rate in the country simply because young soliders dont take the time with a loved one to really get to know them or they cant handle being away from eachother and cheat there are many factors that cause someone to cheat

Answer 10

My boyfriend is in the Air force. He goes tdy like every two months for two months. And in 5 Months he pcses to Misawa Japan. I am gonna do anything I can to go with him...

And I would never ever in my life think about cheating on him , if he has to go to korea for a year, so it be... I know he loves me and I love him with all my heart.

I know a lot of couples, where the man and the woman take every opportunity they get to cheat on each other. I don't understand how they can even look at each other and not feel like dying.

Oh man I could go on and on about some of those people piss me off!
Even my bf best friend tryed hitting on me a day after he left to go to 7 level school. They think every one would cheat.... GRGRRR

Oh well. As long as there are still honest and loyal people like us out there its ok, right??