Home Schooling Question?

Question

I know a woman who home schools her 14year old son and 8 year old daughter.

I was interested in it so I asked her why she decided to home school instead of send them to a public school instead of a public school? (as we have many good schools in our area)

She replied that she's tried two schools for her son but they didn't work out.


Personally I don't agree with that. I know that they are her children and it's her choice. But when these children are older wont they think 'Oh that didn't work out, I'll just give up and find something else'.

What happens when they are working and don't like the people they are working with. They can't just get up and leave every time something doesn't suit them. What about her daughter, she's never had the chance to go to school before.

Do you agree with me?

I'm not against home schooling but I think there needs to be a good reason.

She said he had trouble making friends and he was bullied.

I think we've all experienced bullying at school. How many people pack up and just quit? I havn't quit a job before so no. But I have had to be around people I don't like and would rather not be. I just dealt with it, but she's teaching him to run away from his problems.

gldjns- My auntie sent her children to a very cultural diverse school. It's really good for them. They learn to get along with people from all walks of life and accept other people and help them.

I live in New Zealand and we don't have children coming to school with guns and we don't have gangs. I've been in the public school system for 13years now and I've been bullied and treated badly by other children and even teachers but I can say I've learned so much. If my Mother had taken me away from the 'bad stuff' then I wouldn't be the person I am today. I believe you're crippling your children by selecting who you want to be around your children like that.

Teachers are there for a reason, to teach! There are other schools out there if the one you're at doesn't work out. This is my third high school and my first one didn't work out but this one did

I also know another boy who is home schooled. He gets up when ever he wants to. Most of his days start at 2pm. How is he going to get a job, when the last 13years of his life it's been ok for him to wake up at after lunch and do what he pleases?

Answer 1

i agree with u.. man those other peeps answers are so long!

Answer 2

Well, my daughter decided to home school because she felt that public schools were a bad influence. The teachers were okay, but the kids came from various family situations, some of them dysfunctional and some with abuse-neglect issues. Thus, since the student body had no parental control, they would get into fights, drugs, gangs, sex, ---yes, even in the primary grades. Also, my daughter is devoutly religious and wanted her children to get a good Christian education.

At first, I was opposed to home schooling because I thought my grandkids would not have enough exposure to other children and activities. However, this was an incorrect assumption, because if anything, they had an increased social life within a healthful and supervised environment with other students who were home-schooled. In fact, I wondered how they could keep up with all the activities and field trips, etc. They are now teenagers, and while I really hate to sound like I'm bragging, they have achieved some top test scores nationwide, and are extremely talented and well-educated young people.

Okay, getting to your concerns (I do tend to ramble, and I apologize) This woman said it didn't work out. What do you think she meant by that. Could it be that she had the same concerns my daughter had? Is it possible that her children didn't like the public schools for a good reason? Just because she decided to home school her kids for whatever reason, does not mean they are going to grow up to be cop-outs. Home schooling, while concentrating on the curriculum, also addresses many social and behavioral issues. So the kids really turn out great, with good attitudes and moral behavior. I don't think you have anything to worry about as far as their ethics and values when they reach adulthood. In fact, I'd say they will probably be a cut above the rest. But don't take my word for it! Talk to others who have been home schooled, or are home school teachers. I think you'll be pleasantly surprised. Good luck!

Answer 3

I home schooled my kids for nine years. In that time I did learn a lot about it. I met a lot of different people and saw many different ways that people home school their children. Through it all I saw one continuous factor that 'good' homeschooling parents had in common. A dedication to their child's education. If we are willing to put ourselves aside and focus on the education of our children, homeschooling can be a wonderful thing. Obviously it isn't for everyone since some parent's are not able to or not willing to put forth great efforts to give their child a range of experiences. If parents can and do expose their children to many different experiences and ideas homeschooling can be a wonderful thing. Resources are everywhere. I personally found mine through a trusted school in my area that also published home school material. Many other people I knew used material they found on the internet without having ever spent a dime. Many people make the silly assumption that if a child is home schooled they get no socialization. This implies that the ONLY experiences in life that can give a child socialization is school. How absurd is that? If a child is in clubs (boy/girl scouts, for example) or team sports, or if the children belong to a church or a home school group, or if the family itself has many friends that they get together with often, the children WILL, by default, be socialized. When my children wanted to go to school last year after nine years of being at home, they had no problem at all fitting in and getting along with other kids. They are not socially challenged or inhibited. They are very normal, active, going out on Friday nights kids. Homeschooling does not equal no-social life. Living in a cave does.

Answer 4

If she's getting her kids involved with other things such as team sports or arranging times for them to be with other kids, it should be fine. With school, you have one teacher per 28 or so students. His mother might think he needs more attention than what his teacher would be able to provide, perhaps. Also, there are some concepts that are taught in public schools that some parents have a hard time with. (Although there are typically waivers that parents can sign so that their children don't get taught something that they don't believe in.)
Personally, I think school offers some wonderful experiences and that it outweighs the bad. . . but I can see how some parens would want to protect their children from the bad.

Answer 5

Actually you're not really asking a homeschooling question, you're asking who agrees with your opinion on homeschooling and this particular family.

I'm curious as to what you would think is a 'good reason' for homeschooling. And would you consider the opposite, that people who are capable of providing education and social outlets for their own children should have a 'good reason' to send them to an institution to learn these things from someone else?

You say you are not against homeschooling, but your multiple edits belaboring the points made by individual posters who disagree with you bear out that you are.

I do agree with one thing you said - "they are her children and it's her choice". If someone had the nerve to question the way you chose to raise and educate your children (or even, say, post a message on an international internet board regarding how they felt about your decision) how would you feel about that? You're absolutely not respecting what you said - her kids, her choice.

I'll leave it to the more knowledgable ppl here to address your individual 'points', but I did want to answer your actual question:
"Do you agree with me?"
Emphatically not...

Answer 6

Please tell me why there has to be a "good reason" for homeschooling. I'd really like to know.

I homeschool my kids because I want to. Period. I owe no one an explanation. I may help them try to understand but I don't have to.

Sounds like she is trying to protect her son from abuse. What on earth is wrong with that? If that child was being bullied at home it would be called child abuse and the child would be taken from the home. But if it's done in a school setting then somehow it's okay. I've never understood that.

I have one dd that has never "had the chance" to go to school before and she has no urge to go. My kids are not shy by any stretch. I wish they were a little less outgoing sometimes. *grin*

And you are right, they are her children and it is her choice.

Answer 7

You mean you have never left a job because of a personality clash with a boss? I have. It "didn't work out", and finding something better didn't hurt me.

This lady sounds like she gave you a short answer to a complicated question because she did not want to go into detail. She never told you all her grievances with the school, if she disagreed with the instruction methods or content, or if the other kids were bullying her kid while the teacher failed to control behavior or discipline in her room... you don't know every detail because she hasn't told you much ,has she? Sounds like she didn't want to have to defend her choices to you, and I think as long as she does a good job with home instruction, she shouldn't have to justify herself to you. I know many home schoolers who turned out fine. One is in college now studying forestry conservation. One turned out to be a teacher. Weird eh?

Don't worry about it.

Answer 8

I think when it comes to education you simply must put academics first. If a child is being bullied and therefore can't focus on school work, the whole point of school has just gone out the window. Also, while I want my kids to stick to it and keep trying for things they want, I also want them to know its okay to walk away when something is not working out and is making them miserable. If at thirty they realize their job is not fulfilling and they want to try something else, I want them to know its okay.
Aside from that, school doesn't resemble jobs much, at least not any jobs I'd want to keep. Beating people up at work generally gets you fired, at school you get a slap on the wrist and you're back the next day, or maybe the next week if they were "harsh" with you. As a person who spent years getting bullied and pushed around, years trying to just not be noticed for fear of being beat up, years of hiding in the girls restroom during recess, years of trying to get in trouble and kept in at recess, years of wishing I had a gun...(now I am glad one wasn't available to me, but back then I was still immature and not looking ahead too far) I can't see subjecting a kid to that.
I homeschool my kids for academic, social, and spiritual reasons. I don't agree with your statements that this mom's reasons are wrong, unless you've been the one being relentlessly bullied you can't relate. Sounds like she is a dedicated mother looking out for the best interests of her kids.

Answer 9

I'm homeschooled. But then again I'm 17 and I only did it so I can finish high school in 1 year working at my own pace as opposed to sitting in class and not being able to hold down steady job hours...

Answer 10

I have to say that I am respectfully disagreeing with you.

Any reason she chooses to homeschool is not only her business, but it's a good reason for *her* family.
It may not sound *good* to you, and it may not be what you would have said as a reason if you decided to homeschool , but it's her reason and it is obviously what is right for her family.

I see what she said to you as a very short answer to why she is homeschooling.
I can say that it didn't work out for one of my kids as well.
But, if you knew me, you would know that there is MUCH more to it than that... I didn't just up and let him *quit* because it wasn't working... actually it was completely the opposite!
I started homeschooling him because the school wasn't finishing what they started... his education.. he was suppose to be in 7th grade and tested at 4th level. It wasn't working for him.... We have taught him to finish his work , to do it even if he doesn't like it, we have made him learn more by not staying with something that * didn't work out*.
There are MANY reasons but each person has their own and it may not always be what everyone else thinks is right :-)

Answer 11

I hate to say this, but you don't seem to have an open mind. You have judged her decision without questioning it or asking her in depth about her reasoning.

No one on this earth knows a child better than their parent. She doesn't have to justify what she does to anyone other than herself. However, her discussing it with you shows that she is willing to communicate her decisions.

Ask her why she does it as homeschooling is done for many different reasons.

My personal reasons and hers are probably day & night.