I yelled at my cat and slapped her because she broke my vase, now she wont come near me, help!?

Question

Ok well, my cat just broke my 80 dollar china vase today and I found it on the floor when I got home. I took her to the vase, picked her up and shook her from side to side till she meowed, then LIGHTLY gave her a small slap on the side, no it wasnt to where it would hurt. But after that, she wont come near me. I also sprayed her with water, what do I do? The cat ALWAYS likes to sit in my lap but today she wont :(

Answer 1

You both need time to cool off. Prove to her that you are no longer mad at her.

Answer 2

I don't doubt your cat thinks you've gone crazy. The punishment came WAY after the vase was broken so the cat made no connection to what was making you act bad. You basically attacked her. She's got no clue why and since you're doing someting unpredictable and potentially dangerous around her, she's not going to want to get close for a while.

It didn't matter how much the vase cost, she only sees it as a thing and it was probably an accident. Shaking her can hurt her, remember the 'shaken baby' thing that happens when adults shake a crying baby? It's dangerous. You've got an animal about the size of a baby and you're shaking it? Don't.

The light tap wasn't the problem, your shaking and water spray and any yelling you may have done was what freaked her. She's going to need time to trust you again.

It's useless to punish a cat even 5 minutes after they do something--they won't understand. If you can't catch them in the act to do a change of behavior right then and there (and a loud "Hey!" should be enough), don't punish them. It's too late to make a difference and can damage the bond between you.

Answer 3

Why do people do this to their animals? It's totally cruel. Animal cruelty is against the law. It can either be a misdemeanor or felony. No wonder the cat is avoiding you. Think about it. What were you thinking? This poor cat has no idea why you hurt her. I can guarantee you that shaking her side to side hurt her. If you have a cat, don't put an expensive breakable object where the cat could accidently knock it off onto the floor. Cats are very careful not to knock over things, but accidents do happen. It's not the cat's fault, it's yours! YOU are the one that needs to be shook and slapped. I'm on the cat's side. Next time use your head instead of your hands. This poor cat has been traumatized and it will take time for her to trust you again. As for me, I would never trust you again.

Answer 4

You don't punish him. It is likely he won't make the connection for having broken the vase and getting punished some time after he did it. Things like that happen when you have cats, so it's best to keep expensive things out of their reach. Otherwise, the cat really can't be held accountable for your mistake. In my experience and opinion, cats can feel guilty, and he may very well feel that breaking the vase was an accident and he didn't mean to. Accidents don't deserve punishment.

Answer 5

Well I think all of those things that you did in succession probably scared your cat and made her wary of you. I yell at my cats and they just completely ignore me, but obviously your cat's feelings were hurt. I think your method was a little excessive... it is hard to discipline her because the incident was already over and she really couldn't understand what was going on. She was like "WTF? She comes home and yells and slaps and shakes me?" So you're going to have to just suck it up and wait for her to come around. Be extra nice to her and show her that you were mad but you are ok now. I understand the frustration when something like this happens, having a dog and three cats. I do want to stress, though, that it is important to NEVER EVER shake a cat, because they can easily suffer from brain damage (like a baby that is shaken!!). So just be glad that she didn't cut herself, save for a new vase, and try to make nice with your kitty!! Oh, and don't put anything breakable anywhere your cat might go. I had a reed diffuser (type of potpourri) on top of my medicine cabinet, specifically because I thought that the cats would never think of going there. A few weeks ago, they did and it smashed all over the bathroom. I yelled and ranted and the cats hid (though I was mostly upset because one of them got the potpourri liquid on her when the jar splashed and I couldn't catch her at first to clean her). Your cat will get over it but she doesn't trust you right now, because she is not sure what you will do. Good luck!

Answer 6

First of all, you should NEVER shake or slap or hit or yell at a cat. They just don't understand and it will eventually turn them against you.

Secondly, you can only do any kind of "punishment" right when the incident happened, or they will not relate the punishment to the incident. Even if you take them back to it, they will not connect the two events.

The only thing you can do is if you catch them in the act of something, then you can squirt them with water or clap your hands loudly, but NEVER yell or hit or shake them. How would you like it if someone 100 times your size all of a sudden whacked you? Probably wouldn't be too nice, eh? I bet you wouldn't want to come near them, would you?

The other thing is, you have to realize that they do not intentionally break things. It isn't like she saw that vase and was like, "hmmm...what can I do to bust that all up???" It just doesn't happen that way. If you are going to have pets, you must take precautions to protect your other stuff. If your stuff is that important to you, maybe you should consider not having pets, or at least not indoor ones...

So, just remember these things and don't do them to her again. Meanwhile, you are just going to have to wait for her to get done being mad at you for "being mean". I bet she will come around in a few hours or maybe a day or two. Don't try to force her or chase her. Let her do it on her own terms.

Meanwhile, please don't ever, ever shake or slap or hit or yell at her anymore. Have you ever heard of shaken baby syndrome? Same thing can happen to animals.

Answer 7

I dont think that was the right way to correct your cat slapping or shaking should never happen, anytime they do something wrong you have to say no in an authoritive way during the act not after, yes it's an expensive vase but you shouldn't let your cat in the areas where you dont want them to be you might have to grab your kitty (NICELY) say no several times and put them down until they get the point.

Answer 8

Shaking a cat? that's the equivalent of shaking a baby!
You're too irresponsible to be "caring" for any animal since what you do is abuse it instead of educate.
You might have caused the cat to become epileptic with shaking it.

Did you not think to maybe make sure the cat can't get to the cae?. Did you think to ask anyone what to do to avoid this? You didn't think, you simply reacted, and that's wrong. If you had taken adequate care this would not have happened.
It's not the cat's fault but your. There's a whole internet full of information on how to treat and raise a happy cat - I would suggest you take a look and educate yourself.

Answer 9

I won't yell at you, because it is obvious that you are sorry and that you love your cat. Living with an animal means that some things will be broken or ruined. You need to put away valuable things that are fragile.
I am sure she didn't mean to break the vase. Cats just like to jump up and explore.
And she will forgive you.
When I inadvertently stepped on my cat's paw, she hissed and ran away to hide somewhere in the house. But then she came out and everything was okay.

Answer 10

You shook her side to side??????????
What the hell for?????????
If you did that to a child you would be arrested.
No wonder she won't come to you, you don't deserve her.
Accidents happen, what you think she deliverately broke your (big wow $80) vase.
Bit stupid of you to leave it out where she could knock it over really.
Shaking her side to side though, WHAT ARE YOU ON?????
Cat's do not respond being told off, they don't care that much. But when that vase broke, and the noise it would have made would have been her telling off because I can guarantee she would have run like hell when it crashed to the ground.
Praise cats for good behaviour and ignore the bad. They hate being ignored and soon learn how to get good attention from you.

Answer 11

First of all put all your valuables away and maybe permanently in a hutch.

She had no idea why she was getting punished. Had you been there when it happened, she may of connected as to why you were so angry, but after the fact she only knew you hurt her.

She is scared to come close to you now and get hurt again. The only thing you can do is tell her how sorry you are. Don't force her to be with you. She will respond in her time.

This is whats happens to many cats. When abused by humans many never completely recover.

I wish you patience and hope she comes around, meantime, get your valuables put away so this won't happen again.