How do you deal with a negative/rude co-worker?

Question

I have a very rude co- worker who unfortunatley I work for. She has mood swings and can be really rude sometimes. To the point that she sometimes ignores me when saying "HI"- and we sometimes have to sit next to each other.

Answer 1

I've successfully worked with someone very much like your co-worker for 11 years. Our desks are side-by-side and we are the only people in the office. Here's how I handle it:

1. DONT' LET HER RUIN YOUR MOOD. If she doesn't respond when you speak or makes rude comments, don't let it get you down. She's the one with the problem, not you.

2. TRY TO VIEW HER WITH SYMPATHY. Either she is manic and needs medication or she is simply not happy unless she is unhappy. What a sad way to struggle through life.

3. BE PROFESSIONAL BUT NOT A DOORMAT. If she is rude or inappropriate stand up for yourself tactfully. Co-workers like this usually thrive off of gossip, intimidation, and control.

4. GIVE YOUR BOSS A HEADS UP. If her tacky behavior includes trying to make you look 'bad' so she can look better have a private meeting with your boss and explain your concerns about this co-worker. Ask your boss to come to you if there is ever an issue about your job performance.

Be polite...be consistent...be firm. Good luck!

Answer 2

Are you new to the workplace? Give her time to know you. Most people do not warm up to the new kid until that coworker can prove himself /herself capable and therefore "OK".

Another thing that may have happened is a generation gap. The younger you are , the less responsibilities you have (in her mind), and therefore are not burdened by the same load of emotional garbage that older people lug around no matter where they are. They think of last nights fight, their kids problems, school, money matters, mortgages, health, their husbands, etc.

Just do your job and try not to talk to her when she looks like she is regurgitating some emotional debris. Leave her in her own little world during mood swings. Get yourself an MP3 , put your ear buds on, and listen to music.

And by the way, after a while, you will also be able to say "hi" and keep walking on. The workplace is no place for chitchat. A "hi" simply is a greeting and you do not require a feedback nor conversation to follow.

Answer 3

Don't take it personally. You don't know what's going on in this person's life to make her so unhappy. When I was younger I was in a job where I was considered the negative one. It wasn't about my co-workers, the truth was I was in an abusive relationship and so anxious about it I was suicidal. I guess my anxiety came across in my personality at work. I feel bad about it now. If you haven't done anything to offend this person than this may be the reason she comes off as negative. Just leave her be, be professional. You don't want to exacerbate the problem.

Answer 4

It must be a girl uh? I had the same problem when I first start working, but what I do is make the best out of a bad situation. Don;t let them get to you, you are there to work not to make friends. But anyway what I use to do is just get on her nerves to where she had to like me. I am so goofy. And it use to get on her nerves when I had to ask her a question, I did not care, she was a super meanie but oh well, she loosened up a LITTLE BIT. But some people are naturally mean.

Answer 5

I work with all men. They don't understand why I get upset with their attitude towards me. They think I'm a silly little girl that doesn't know how to do my job. This one guy is the worst, when he shows me something he gets this look on his face like "feck, I'm babysitting again" I'm 22 and in a professional environment. WOW, they just don't get it. I feel your pain. Fecking co-workers.

Answer 6

If I were you I'd be looking for another job or at least a different position with a different supervisor. People like your rude co-worker never change.

Answer 7

kill them.

Naw but seriously, just take it lightly, laugh at/with them, give as good as you get.



If she doesn't respond to your greetings, maybe combine your "Hi" with a big hug and a kiss, or do it louder. What's she going to do, sack you for being loudly friendly? She will look like the weirdo in front of the employment tribunal for that. Or, instead of saying "hi", try saying "I love you". see what happens.

I always find getting naked with your co-workers eases any tensions you might have.

All the best

Answer 8

If she's doing this because she dislikes you, don't let it bother you. Don't let it blow up and make her have it in for you, though, either.

If she's doing it because she is caught up in her own ego and self-centered and puts everyone else second behind her -- which I suspect is the case -- just realize this is a sign of her limitations. She isn't "doing this to me"... she's unable to act normal, basically. That reflects on her, and not at all on you. Again, don't let it bother you.

Answer 9

Life sucks at times but hey do what I do for have my share of those. Do not change your good ways to please an asshole. Kill them with kindness because it works 24/7 and rest assure that he or she is going to get the message.

Answer 10

I agree with the first person. Just ignore her.