How do you give a really good wedding toast?

Question

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Answer 1

Think of a cute strory that will make the crowd chuckle. But it must be short and honor the couple. (The groom can be slightly roasted but not embarrased. The bride must be honored.) Tie the story to traits that will make the marriage work, and ask the crowd to join you in celebrating those traits.

Answer 2

As someone who is in the wedding business, I hear wedding toasts every weekend. Here are some of my tips:

For the bride & groom- Pick no more that two people to give toasts. Any more than that and people get bored and restless. Remember, everyone is starving by this time! If you want to include other people, have them do a toast at the rehearsal dinner.

For the speakers-

1. Practice before. At least make some rough notes and do a run-through at home. You don't want to be grasping for straws in front of an audience.

2. Keep it short & sweet. Going on & on about things you did in high school isn't necessary. Wish the couple well and toast to their long life and happiness.

3. Do NOT tell any story that will embarass the bride or groom. If your story involves any kind of bodily fluid or bathroom function, it doesn't belong at a wedding. Save it for the bachelor party.

4. It's not all about you. Yes, it says a lot about your relationship to the bride or groom that you were chosen to give a toast, however, once you briefly establish how you know them, move on and toast to them.

5. Don't forget the toast. So many people tell a story or two and then sit down without giving an actual toast. At the end ask everyone to raise their glasses.

6. Keep it short and sweet. This bears repeating. ;)

Good luck!

Answer 3

The first thing you want to ask yourself is "What can I put into a toast for this couple that no one else can?" If the happy couple specificly asked you to make a toast, it's probably because you are very close to one or both of them. So use that. Don't just fall back on the standard "You're a great couple and you'll be very happy together". Tell an intimate story that could only come from you. Really let the couple know how happy you are for them and what they mean to you. Think of a story you know that exemplifies a really great quality in whichever of the couple you're closest to, a quality that helps make them a great partner in this new marriage. Or talk about how the couple met and how you've watched their relationship grow. Bring you perspective into it - be it humorous, light, or deeply sincere - and you'll make the bride and groom very happy.

If you're toasting as more of a formality - say if the bride and groom asked every single member of their extended families to do a toast and you're the groom's second cousin who he sees once a year - you can go with a more general, short toast with just a touch of the personal.

On a similar note, try to be aware of how many other people are giving toasts and roughly how much time you have. Stay away from 20 page essays.

If you feel very comfortable with public speaking, you can just note a few key points you want to make in your toast and improvise the exact words on the day. If you're not comfortable winging it, write out the whole thing and practice it a few times. You don't need to memorize it, but get to the point where it doesn't sound like you're reading off cards, even if you are.

Avoid sensetive topics and know your audience. Some wedding attendees may be shocked by your story about your newly married kid brother unintentionally swearing at the family dinner table; others may think it's a riot. Try to get a sense of who's attending and what kind of humor is OK for them. Really touchy subjects, like previous marriages, temporary break-ups, or former girlfriends/boyfriends, should always be avoided. Embarassing stories can be fun, but don't go overboard. When in doubt, ask family or the person getting roasted.

Answer 4

I've given two toasts, one for a good friend and one for my brother. Both have gone well and I received many compliments. Here's my advice.

1. Practice ahead of time. Don't make it up at the last minute, you'll bomb. You only get one shot to do this, and though it's not the most important thing at the wedding, it will be remembered.
2. Have some notes just in case, but you should have practiced the speech enough that you have it pretty much memorized.
3. Not too long, not too short 2-5 minutes.
4. Here's a good format: a) Thank the host. b) Tell a great story about the groom. One that will make people laugh. It should embarras you and the groom equal amounts, but not enough that anyone gets upset. c) Compliment the bride. d) Compliment the bridge and the goom together. e) ALWAYS end the toast with "Let's all raise our glasses for a toast to...."
5. That's it. Once your done, THEN you can have a bunch of drinks.

Answer 5

As a wedding DJ I hear a lot of toasts. A lot. I get asked all the time what makes a good toast and what makes a bad one. These are the things I tell them.

1) Quit worrying about it. You have been invited here as an honor and no matter what you say, they'll love it. Don't try to be memorable and unless you are a professional comedian, stay away from jokes.

2) I don't care if you & the groom had a wild time in Mexico, shut it. This is about the day, the bride & the celebration, not about what you used to do as a kid. The time for that behavior is behind you. Do *not* embarrass the couple.

2a) Do not mention past girlfriends/boyfriends! I can not stress this enough. It's classless and invariably causes bad feelings.

3) Tell who you are and thank whomever invited you to be the best man or maid/matron of honor. They didn't have to choose you and it really is an honor.

4) Last, don't forget to have everyone raise their glasses & toast. This is the most forgotten thing and allows the speech to kind of trail away into an uncomfortable silence.


Remember, this is a great honor. Before you say anything think of whether or not you'd like it to be said at your wedding. This is going to be a memorable part of the evening; make it a good memory!

Answer 6

I was once the best man at my best friend's wedding and in the middle of the reception, when I was already fairly drunk, the father asked that I make a wedding toast.

Here is what I learned.

To give a really good wedding toast, ensure your bread is top quality and does not burn. Multi-grain is my favorite and It should be golden brown with the aroma of promise and hope for love and friendship that the union will bring.

But seriously. Start with a warm and friendly joke to get the audiences attention. Then describe how you met the groom and/or bride. How you came to know them as a couple and any cute experiences you shared together, and how you feel so honored "making the toast". Close with some positive thoughts for a long happy and healthy life together.

Most important, stay sober until after the toast! A drink or two to shake off the jitters is okay but stay focused and rehearse the lines many times leading up to the day of the wedding.

Break a leg!

Answer 7

I'd add one major category to the do's and don'ts list - Do Not Bring In The Negative.

Do not mention you hope this goes better than the previous sixty-four relationships either person was in, do not mention you hope the bride won't be a real ****** about letting him hang out with the guys, do not mention that it has to be better than your uncle Larry the child-abuser's marriage; even as a joke bringing in anything like this is not ok, it makes for a petty, miserable, and bitter toast, and can start a fight if you include the wrong information about any of those sixty-four exes. The comment in the video about "guy humor" really covers a lot of these instances, such as not mentioning how the groom threw up all night after the stripper put an olive in his mouth with her mouth at the bachelor party. Or how many beer kegs he's hidden from the bride while they were dating. Or anything else you think is funny but is negative at the root of it.

Do think about what you care most about in the person on whose side of the wedding you are, and about how any one of those qualities matches and blends well with the person they are marrying.

Do always wish the best!

Answer 8

It is a moment when heart beat goes up. And if you are shy person it will be much more difficult to stand in front of guests.

An example is given here for help:

The wedding-day toast, traditionally the responsibility of the best man alone, today is often given by both the bride's and groom's honor attendants. Sometimes the best man and maid of honor will coordinate their toasts into a "joint act" of sorts. But more often, one simply follows the other, usually with the best man going first.

The primary purpose of the toast is to wish the happy couple good luck and good fortune in their marriage. Unlike rehearsal dinner toasts, which allow for some good-natured roasting, wedding toasts should be more sentimental and reserved. Your toast can be as short and sweet as two or three lines, which you can write yourself or borrow from the Bible, a poetry book, literature and so on. Or you might prefer to fashion your toast into a short story several paragraphs long. In this case, try to give guests a window into your relationship with the bride and share your good feelings about her new life with the groom. It's important that you limit your toast to three to five minutes, since holding court for much longer can cause the crowd to grow restless.

If your toast is on the short side, you can start by inviting guests to rise (if they haven't already) and raise their glasses to the happy couple. Or you can simply ask everyone to raise their glasses and toast the bride and groom at the end of your speech. Once you're finished, make your way to the bride and groom to give them each a handshake, hug or kiss.

Hope this will be helpful

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Answer 9

For the bride & groom- Pick no more that two people to give toasts. Any more than that and people get bored and restless. Remember, everyone is starving by this time! If you want to include other people, have them do a toast at the rehearsal dinner.

For the speakers-

1. Practice before. At least make some rough notes and do a run-through at home. You don't want to be grasping for straws in front of an audience.

2. Keep it short & sweet. Going on & on about things you did in high school isn't necessary. Wish the couple well and toast to their long life and happiness.

Answer 10

Here are a few key tips from the VineTrekker.com Book of Toasts:
1) Be yourself, don't feel pressure to entertain or amuse the audience
2) Stay Sober! Hold off on the drinks until after the toast
3) Keep it short and sweet; although the bride and groom might enjoy a nice long story, the other guests will appreciate your brevity.
4) Practice your toast beforehand, you don't have to memorize, just get comfortable with your general message

For more information, try the book at ToastersChoice.com or TheToastMasterGeneral.com.

Good Luck!

Answer 11

My husband and the Best man worked on it together. I think our wedding toast was the best I have ever heard at a wedding. I wish I had a copy of it here with me.

I have a great sense of humor and so does everyone in my family. I loved how he was able to make people laugh without hurting anyone's feelings. It really depends on the couple and would suggest checking out different speeches and stealing some ideas via internet. Our best man told everyone that he stole ideas off the internet since this was his first 'American' wedding and being a best man. He had everyone laughing hysterically. I was glad he got the party going!!!

search: bestman speeches...

A speech is always better written by someone that truly knows the groom, the bride to be and families involved. So, if you need help in writing a speech I would suggest asking the groom. Don't get drunk or make any rude statements. Be careful not to offend anyone.
This looks like a good website.. check it out. Good luck!
http://www.hitched.co.uk
http://www.hitched.co.uk/speeches/samples/samplespeechhome.aspx#bestman