My son Jack just turned 5 about a month ago, and he has a friend named Shawn who is also 5. Recently Shawn has started to swear and I don't want my son to pick that up, but the two are good friends and it would be upsetting for both to break up their friendship. What should I do?
2007-07-26 11:45:25 · 10 answers · asked by Carolina 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
As soon as your son says his first swear word, punish him harshly. It's easier to starting teaching him discipline now than when he is older.
2007-07-26 11:54:40 · answer #1 · answered by thmtom 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You need to make it clear to Jack that he can't swear.
Be really careful before you break up a friendship. My son at 10 started hanging out with the kid from down the street. The parents both smoked and the kid didn't have the world's best manners and, frankly, seemed a lot dumber than my son. My mother said she didn't think Billy was a good influence, but I was too busy to do anything about it. Good thing.
A year later my son was dealing with depression. One day, the two boys were sitting outside in full view of the street while my son cried and his friend tried to cheer him up. (11 year-old boys don't do that!) I knew then that Jesse was a great judge of character. Even when Jesse told everyone at school later that year that he'd spent a week in the hospital after a suicide attempt, Billy never missed a visit to the house or sitting next to him on the bus. I did make him stop spitting in front of me, though.
They're both 21 now and have grown apart. Billy will never be Jesse's intellectual equal altho' he's smarter than I thought originally, but I'd lie down in traffic for that young man. A friend is too precious for us at any age to toss one for a fixable reason. I hope Jack never needs Shawn that badly, but we just don't know.
2007-07-26 13:28:55 · answer #2 · answered by Sarah C 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Teach Jack to be a good influence on Shawn. All kids try out new words, tell Shawn if he swears at your house he will have to go home it is unacceptable in your home. When(not if) Jack swears tell him it is unacceptable and explain why. Tell him what will happen to him when if he does that.
My great nephew announced he was going to swear and his mother told him if he did he couldn't go see grandpa, he said he couldn't help it, it was coming out. She had to take him home instead of continuing towards his grandparents house. He is 11 now and knows not to swear in front of his mother or bad things happen.
2007-07-26 11:54:35 · answer #3 · answered by shipwreck 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I guess you would treat the behavior like any other behavior. You can tell him that it is not okay for him to use those words and give him a time-out, whatever you do for a bad behavior. You may also want to mention it to Shawn's parents. He may have picked up the words without them knowing. You can also tell Shawn that you don't use those words in your house.
2007-07-26 11:53:15 · answer #4 · answered by brwneyes 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to encourage Shawn to not use bad words, tell him that they are hurtfull and explane to him (in 5 year old language) why they are so bad and hurtful. Try to encourage good behaviour, and when he acts good you can give him and your son a little surprise.
But i'm just going to tell you, that at one point or another your son WILL hear those bad words and he will repeat them, not its up to you to explane to him that he shouldnt say them because his best friend (or anybody) said them and its up to him to listen to you.
Good Luck! :]
2007-07-26 12:36:32 · answer #5 · answered by little.miss.hot.lips 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The next time he comes over, you could pull Shawn aside and ask him not to say those words. If he can refrain from saying them, you'll give him a treat, like a cookie. It wouldn't be fair to punish him, because he's not your child. But you can encourage good behavior within your own household. Also, talk to his parents.
2007-07-26 11:53:28 · answer #6 · answered by Riven Liether 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just very carefully on a five yr old level that his friends words are wrong and you better not hear him saying them or he will have to be grounded from his friend for awhile and explain what grounded is.my kids have hung out with kids who cuss and that is how I dealt with it now if they cuss when I can not hear I do not know but they do not do it around myself or any other adult. good luck
2007-07-26 11:55:11 · answer #7 · answered by Beckles 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
talk to Shawn's mom and tell her that if he doesn't change that habit you can't let the two boys play together
2007-07-26 11:54:17 · answer #8 · answered by tilda 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just tell your son not to cus like his friend does.
2007-07-26 12:00:02 · answer #9 · answered by S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could ask the boy not to say the words & ask his mother to talk to him about it.
2007-07-26 12:14:53 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋