Ex-christians, in what ways are you happier since you left the church?

Question

Feel free to elaborate.....

Answer 1

I've always had a questioning nature. I was raised mormon and began by questioning the insanity that they preached. Later I began to question this Jesus fellow, than eventually god him/herself. After much reading and research into every tidbit I could get my hands on, I came to my own conclusions, which I assure you do not include jesus or the god of the abrahamic religions in the least. As a result, I am free from feeling guilty for being a human, and I now take responsibility for my own actions rather than letting a "messiah" forgive me of things.

Answer 2

I discovered I was *not* a victim, and actually *did* have control of my life. That is one of the main things that made me happier. Before, I had been trained to believe I had no control and God was in control. And I did nothing to help myself because I was told not to, because if I did my will, instead of Gods - I was fighting against God's plan for me.

I was able to let go of guilt over stupid things (like negative emotions and sexual urges) and realized I didn't have to be ashamed to be a woman and I wasn't dirty and evil, nor the reason for mankinds fall into sin. That made me a lot happier because not being Christian has allowed me to accept me for who I am. That doesn't mean I don't strive to better myself, but it does mean I no longer focus on my faults or constantly think what a horrible person I am. I accept that I made a mistake, move on, and don't try to make it again. I also have a lot more self confidence and have learned that I'm not so terrible after all.

I also discovered that I had wasted a lot of years worrying about and preparing for death instead of living. So when I started living again and celebrating life - I really was happier. Those are probably the three big ones.

Answer 3

Actually I wasn't at first. There was a mixture of anger, betrayal (at my parents), and confusion. The deprogramming process was long and difficult... I had to learn the concept of alternating agendas vs. good and evil... all the superstitions about agnosticism (at the time what I considered myself) taught in me from indoctrination on... the entire thought process.

I am happier because I see things for what they are rather than the way I am told to look at them.

fireball- if I was raised a born-again, I would have been kicked out rather than leaving of my own accord. That priest would have gotten an earful the SECOND I started questioning genesis- which was at about 12 years old.

Answer 4

I haven't raised my voice in either praise or anger, and now I have to pay to sit next to strangers. No more worries about whos potluck is going to make me sick and my telephone no longer rings with calls telling me so and so needs this or that. My consumption of gasoline has fallen since I no longer need to drive to church on Sunday and my grass is greener because I can take the time to water it rather then rely on a sprinkler system. I feel more tolerant of others except speeders because nobody is telling me why I can compare my life to theirs. I still get a good dose of religion because there is a Christian Radio Station in the area, so all things considered all I miss is the frown of the man holding the collection basket.

Answer 5

I'm happier because I have been given the opportunity to explore and learn about other religions and cultures without the additional mindset of Christianity. Some practices and thoughts enforced by the church and bible are not necessarily what everyone believes and it is a lifting and enlightening experience to discover how you truly feel about certain matters

Answer 6

No more wondering why I was the only one God didn't talk too. That was depressing.

No more attempting to live up to others standards and putting on appearances for fear of being rebuked.

No more ignoring science and discovery because it threatened my belief.

No more worry about the future, because the bible told me the earth was doomed and headed for a sinful end.

No more worrying about my family members who couldn't believe and were headed for an eternity of torture.

No more fighting over what individual verses and text in context really meant.

No more feeling like an outcast, because the bible told me the world would hate me, when in reality the world didn't care about my religious beliefs.

No more justification of contradictions.

No more reading about the origins of the New Testament with a dread feeling in the pit of my stomach because it showed me that the origins of the actual accounts are not clear and were clearly changed by people over the centuries.

The list goes on.

But most of all.

I am happier because I understand how precious this life really is, how lucky I am to have it, and how important it is for me to make life better for my kids, neighbors and society.

As a Christian, I didn't get that, and spent time worrying about a theoretical afterlife. Bettering society wasn't important because the bible claimed it would all end up in a hand-basket anyway.

Answer 7

Well I don't feel guilty for not submitting to a man. That's just not in my personality. I don't feel guilty about having my tubes tied or all those years that I was on birth control which could have gotten me excommunicated. I don't have to ask question where no one can answer me. And I don't have to be a part of the status gossip houses here, which is the South is just about all church is. It's pretty hard to find a good one. I'm happy.

Answer 8

I no longer fear death, because I see it very clearly now.

Like most of the world, I feared death. It was the great beyond that held for me either eternal bliss, or eternal damnation. Growing up Catholic, I feared the damnation and prayed to God to please spare me, even though I was a very, very good child.

As a teenager, I turned Protestant for two years. Fireball, I was a total born-again Xian - hook, line & sinker. I was sure that I was going to heaven because I was "Saved!" so I didn't worry about heaven or hell 'cause I was cocky like that. To assume I knew the mind of God, HA!

I became a Catholic again, and I found SOOOO MUCH PEACE!!!!! Protestantism left a bad, baaaaad taste in my mouth, and it's still there, and I'm sure it always will be. They were nothing but a bunch of bitter ex-Catholics who told me BIG LIES about the Caholic church, and I believed it all, like a stupid, without investigating these lies first. I was a teenager and gullable, and like vultures, they knew it and took advantage of the fact. However, in time, I discovered the truth of each of their VICIOUS LIES, one by one.

What a sad bunch, eh? Now'days, I feel sorry for them. Such closedmindedness, I swear. When I attended their church (which was Fundamentalist Baptist - yikes!!!), the preacher liked to yell and scream at his sermons, making himself out to be authorative and scary. At least that's how a 16 yr old girl (me) saw it. Seemed that EVERYTHING was a sin, and I learned to judge others very harshly, including and especially, myself. I judged EVERY TINY FIBRE of myself, and found all of it to be wretched and sinful. Aaaaahhh, the misery!!!

Anywho, after returning to Catholicism - which was such a PEACEFUL transformation - I was very devout for appx 13 yrs, then something happened. I discovered the Bahá'í Faith.

I am now a BORN AGAIN BAHA'I, AND I LOVE IT!!! I still love the Catholic church, always will, but I can't deny the truths that I've learned in the Bahá'í Faith. I no longer fear death as a result, because death, unlike most belief, is not the end, but the BEGINNING. It's a BIRTH into the spiritual realm, a BIRTH into the next life, which is far greater than anything we can imagine. Even the loftiest station in this life, that of majestic kings and queens, is far less than a single, tiny speck of dust at the lowest point of Paradise. WOW!!!!! Death to this Earthly life is a GLORIOUS BIRTH TO LIFE ETERNAL!!!

Ahem, whew! Got carried away there, lol! But really, now I welcome death, 'cause it offers more peace than this world can ever dream up.

I'm much more relaxed and non-judgemental now. Not everything's a sin, not everyone is soooo sinful, and I'm not too bad either, lol. I VALUE other people's views, and yes, even the Protestant ones. I've learned more about Christianity since becoming a Bahá'í, and I've even become fairly learned in Islam as well. That itself is another chapter, another BOOK, 'cause Islam is SO BEAUTIFUL!!!

Suffice to say, my pre-Bahá'í world faded in comparison. I'm SOOOO GLAD I found this religion!!!!!

And yes, it's great to sleep in on Sundays, lol.

Answer 9

No more confusion (as far as which religion is the right one). No more people hounding me because I missed one day of church due to work. I swear, they make it seem like it's such a crime to miss one day that the whole group would come to my house for a *surprise* visit. That was very annoying.

Freedom to explore other things (like science) without someone from church accusing me of being interested in worldly stuff (yes I was accused of this). Again, very annoying.
No one telling me how I should live my life.

Answer 10

How about those Christians who are happier since leaving an abusive church?

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