How to get kids to listen.?

Question

I cant get 4 kids to listen to me. I cant seem to get across to them unless i have an aggressive tone. They are my sisters children that i care for so disipline is really hard for us how do i disipline them and make them listen. I dont want my son to have this same problem and i dont want to have to raise my voice everytime i tell him something. How can i stop this chain. Any helpful websites?

Answer 1

This question is in the preschool section. Are you trying to run a preschool with them? Or are they just preschool aged?

Here are a few tricks to try in either case:

1. Use rewards for when they do listen. Talk quietly and explain that whoever follows your directions will get to do this or get this prize. (a game or a popsicle, or something).
2. Praise those who listen. "Thank you Susie, for listening!" Sometimes it will help the others want to listen so you notice them too.
3. Have consequences for not listening. No TV or outdoor play time until they've done whatever they're supposed to be doing.
4. Lay the groundrules down ahead of time. For example, if you take them to a park, explain ahead of time that you will give the kids a 5 minute warning and a 1 minute warning, but that if they don't come when time is up, you won't take them to the park next week.

If you have a hard time getting them to leave the park when you call them (again, as an example), say to them the next day: Oh, I sure wish we could go to the park today. It's too bad we had such a hard time listening last time. Maybe when we go tomorrow we'll do a better job coming when it's time to leave so that we can continue to enjoy the park.

Really, the most important thing to do is be consistent. If you tell them to stop doing something and there is no consequence for them to continue doing it, they won't care. If you 'threaten' a punishment and don't follow through, they'll know not to take the threat seriously next time.

Check out the link in the 'source' section. It's a way of parenting and teaching that let's the children live with the consequences of the choices they make. It eliminates the need for yelling and constant reminders, and has one of the best parenting books I've ever had the pleasure of reading (there are copies available at most libraries).

Best of luck!

~Kyanna

Answer 2

http://www.eastvalleytribune.com/story/23888

Conscious Discipline is one theory for young children. Children have to be taught how to listen. They are not born knowing how to listen or to follow instructions. I believe that teaching them problem solving skills -such as1) to recognize their emotions and feelings when upset or making a bad choice, 2) finding words to describe how they feel and 3) learning to come up with other solutions to the problem. Let them be part of the solution. This will also build character and life long problem solving skills. Good Luck to you, and remember that your love for the children will help you iron out the rough spots.

Answer 3

They are bored, stimulate them, by doing art activites with them, play with play dough, have them run through the srpinkles outside, sing songs, do music activites. Kids that don't listen are often bored out of their minds. Offer rewards or good behavior. When it's time for them to clean up and put toys away don't just say put the toys away, sing songs "put the toys away, put the toys away, now it's time to clean up, put the toys away." Offer positive reinforcement. Everytime they listen or are nice to one another offer stickers, or hand stamps. Tell them everytime you are good you will get a sticker on this chart, and at the end of the week whoever has the most stickers gets a reward out of this cool treasure box. (have a treasure box that the kids can pick things out of at the end of the week, trinket toys, buy at the dollar store.) Everytime they do listen hug them and give them a high five,"you did it, wow I am so proud of you." Also, when you speak to them don't scream, but you can raise your voice and make eye contact, invade their space and say firmly, "I want you to get ready for bed! The sooner you get rady for bed and brush your teeth the sooner I can read you a bed time story!" (remind them of the sticker chart.) If you just say, "clean up now! You are making me so mad! etc, this tells the kids that you don't mean buisness and they will keep trying to push your buttons. Remember with praise, love, patience, lots of fun activites (stories, art, play dough, fun video's, songs), and consistency you will be surprised how they will respond. Also, use love, even when their angry or are making you made hug them and say, "I understand how upset you are, I really do, but we can work through this together, I am here for here."

Answer 4

Check out 1-2-3 magic. http://www.parentmagic.com/ You can get the books at any bookstore, and maybe even your library.

Works reallly well. A lot like what Supernanny does.

Bottom line - do not ever lose your temper. Be clear they have a choice to obey or not to obey, and if not, they have a time out. Bam. No arguements that's just the way it is.

They'll get it.

Good Luck

Answer 5

With them, the only way would be to keep their attention on something so you have the control. Good luck. It's very difficult in today's world because, as you said, there is little discipline out there. Parents would rather be their friend instead of a parent.

Answer 6

clap yopur hands in a specific pattern and make them repeat the pattern to you that laways quiets them down

Answer 7

try the old fashioned way beat them