I lost a wife to breast cancer eight years ago.. Since then I have rarely dated. I met a nice woman nine months ago and we plan to wed in less than six weeks. I love her very, very much. But as we get closer to our wedding, I am starting to have nightmares about my new bride getting sick and dying like my first wife did. Is this just the pre-wedding jitters or something much more serious?
2007-07-26 08:06:26 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I remarried at 47 and it has been such a huge blessing to my life! My ex (we divorced within a year prior to his death) kept popping up in my nightmares! I dreamed he wasn't really dead and that he was only hiding to see if I would remarry. Bothered me a little while, but went away. I am SO happy to have my new love and he is wonderful to me! Completes my life so well! Relax and enjoy your new love! Both "I'm sorry for your loss," and "CONGRATULATIONS!" !!!
2007-07-26 08:22:05 · answer #1 · answered by ♥Sweetmusic ♥ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Loving someone is always a risk. I married my husband on his 50th birthday. I was 34. It is very scary to think that, because of the age difference, he may predecease me. However, when those thoughts come on, I tell myself two things:
1. Anything could happen to anyone at any time. I could get hit by a bus tomorrow and he could live to be 110. Every relationship runs the risk of someone being lost.
2. If I do lose him early, thank God we had each other for the time that we did. How empty and different my life would be if we had never met and married.
You are doing a courageous thing. It is perfectly okay to be both happy and realistic. Congratulations!
2007-07-26 09:16:58 · answer #2 · answered by conductorbrat 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My father who is now 85 lost his first wife to breast cancer also. He was with her for 16 years, he married my mother when he was 50 and she was nearly 40 and they produced ME :o) I am now 35 years old, they had 25 wonderful years together before my mother died. All I can say is that you should not stop the progress of your future based on something that has happened in your past. If my father had done that then I would not be here or my two children.
My dad's motto is that he was grateful that God brought my mother into his life and that created so much happiness for him, if he had known when he married her that he would only have her for 25 years he would not have changed anything.
She was brought into your life for a reason, let the past in the past, you have a lot to look forward to, you are still young, enjoy yourself and LIVE for today and don't let your worries of tomorrow hold you back from that enjoyment.
2007-07-26 08:17:47 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is human nature to be nervous and fear the worst.. We all do it even the ones who dont admit it.. And it is human nature to be nervous about life changing events..
You have lost someone very close and dear to you. Someone that you were to spend the rest of your life with. And even though she isnt here today she is still with you in your heart.
You love this woman who has came into your life and made you smile... Things happen in life.. No one can change that.. So waht you have to do is live one day at a time, and not past it... You never know what tomorrow beholds..
It will be ok... Congrats on finding love again..
2007-07-26 08:28:19 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can see why your brain would go there, since that's what happened the first time. Chances are, though, that it won't happen a second time.
It's natural to be nervous when taking a big step like marriage, even when you've done it before. But once the wedding is over, I'm sure you'll calm down.
2007-07-26 08:27:10 · answer #5 · answered by gileswench 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pre wedding jitters.
Share your feelings with your fiance - she needs to know what's bothering you.
Good luck! You deserve a great life with a wonderful woman.
2007-07-26 08:31:25 · answer #6 · answered by Barbara B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you are nervous about losing the person that you love-again. Don't let stop you. You only live once and it is so great that you have been able to fall in love twice in one life.
2007-07-26 08:14:15 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Probably just jitters, congratulations
2007-07-26 08:11:15 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are human.
You lost someone you deeply loved, and it still hurts...
You love someone deeply, and you fear for her - and for yourself as well.
These are normal feelings - and I believe and trust you WILL win out.
Congratulations, and God's Blessings and Joy to you both!
2007-07-26 08:18:02 · answer #9 · answered by blktiger@pacbell.net 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋