Her dad was a Southern Baptist minister, she's very devout. She considers me to be her only "good" grandaughter. The others either drink too much, smoke too much, have children outside of marriage, are too promiscuous, or is a lesbian. While this has it's percks it gets quite frustrating sometimes when she goes on one of her preaching tirades, and I just want to yell, "Gramma, I'm an atheist!!!" But I'm afraid, (ignoring the fact that she may not consider me the "good" one any more), that she just might keel over from a massive heart attack. Any suggestions. All are welcome, the more clever the better. Thanks.
2007-07-26 07:43:12 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
NewCatholic: My cousins aren't that bad, just according to her they are.
2007-07-26 11:19:56 · update #1
jpnck74: So true.
2007-07-26 11:21:01 · update #2
fruitcake: LMAO. You make a great point.
2007-07-26 11:22:10 · update #3
mzJakes: If I didn't care about anyone else's feelings but my own why am I asking this question, why haven't I already told her, my am I not calling you a....well I too nice for words like that so Good Day to you sir.
2007-07-26 11:27:21 · update #4
You can just tell her that the Flying Spaghetti Monster has His Noodly Appendage on you and will guide you up to heaven where theres a stripper factory, the olive garden of eden, and the almighty beer volcano! She'll understand!
2007-07-26 08:18:19 · answer #1 · answered by ? 4 · 5⤊ 0⤋
Out of respect for the woman's age (you don't mention) and having had a grandmother who I was very close to with a similar problem (I'm a Buddhist and she was devout Catholic) I just didn't feel it was worth the time and effort to bring it up. I didn't feel it necessary to question her beliefs nor did I feel it necessary to disclose mine and I feel that it was the compassionate thing to do. However, if you feel it necessary to talk to her about who you really are, I would sit down with her over a nice lunch and calmly tell her that you have a different outlook on beliefs and then gently share your thoughts with her. I don't think it necessary to shout 'I'm an atheist' even though I've been tempted to tell my whole family that I simply do not share their Catholic beliefs although I respect them. The key to communication in terms of difference in beliefs is to remain respectful. Best to you.
2007-07-26 07:50:38 · answer #2 · answered by Yogini 6 · 5⤊ 0⤋
This is not something that you need to tell her just show her general respect with low enthusiasm when she talks about religion. Her beliefs are a kind of family tradition so you need to make space for them. If you are pressed hard say vague things like "I don't have to turn to the heavens when I've got people like you around me giving advice and support", and stuff like that. She'll get the hint. If you finally have kids and don't indoctronate them into religion you may have to eventually reveal more to her, but all in due time.
2007-07-26 07:52:41 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 6⤊ 0⤋
As a Christian, and I would want to know if my children/grandchildren were Atheist. (I mean, I would want to know everything about my family; good or bad.) HOWEVER, with that said, I would agree with the consensus to not tell her, only because of her age/health. If you are genuinely concerned about her health, it would be better not to tell her. (Unless you're worried someone else in the family will tell her, just to make you look bad in grandma's eyes. Then it should come from you.) If you only want to tell her to ease the burden off your shoulders, I would advise against it.
2007-07-26 08:51:15 · answer #4 · answered by kaz716 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Emily, my dear, telling her will give her a heart attack, and possibly change her idea of the sweet grand-daughter she used to have. I too am an atheist, and know in my heart it would just kill my grandma to hear it, though I wish there was a way. They elderly are usually so set in their ways, that the option of open mindedness is virtually obsolete.
2007-07-26 07:55:01 · answer #5 · answered by jpnkc74 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
She should be mad at her child. Maybe she pushed your Mother or Father so much that they did not do a better job raising you and your siblings? I don't mean that because you are an Atheist, but the Drinking, smoking, etc....
Why do you have to tell her?
We should respect our elders.
Peace be with you.
2007-07-26 07:54:02 · answer #6 · answered by C 7 · 5⤊ 0⤋
My grandmother is Catholic. And like you, I think she thinks I'm one of the good ones. I have never told her, and I never will. She's been ill for some time now, and I won't risk making her feel worse by telling her.
2007-07-26 07:48:39 · answer #7 · answered by Darth Cheney 7 · 7⤊ 0⤋
do you feel that you really need to tell her? is it only to help you, not her? sometimes its better for the both of you to just not tell her.
i have another thing to add for you to think about.... about 3 years ago my grandma [my mom's mom] was dying. my mom loved her mom alot, and every day she went and took care of her. eventually, my grandmother passed, and a few days after my mom told me, i asked her "did you confess anything while she was dying" and my mom said no, "that would only make me feel better, not her". so the moral of the story is, i know you feel guilty for not telling her, but dont. shes probably old and febile, and in a way, its selfish to tell her.
2007-07-26 07:46:13 · answer #8 · answered by lins 5 · 9⤊ 0⤋
I just weren't tell her if I were you. I have never told my parents or Grandparents. There methodists so the religion with them is pretty lax but still I can tell them b/c they would freak if I did.
2007-07-26 07:48:37 · answer #9 · answered by missgigglebunny 7 · 7⤊ 0⤋
If she doesnt ask, why do you need to tell her at all ? She already thingks youre the good one out of the bunch. Let that speak for itself
2007-07-26 07:47:02 · answer #10 · answered by bbq 6 · 8⤊ 0⤋