Have you ever thought, or known, one of your parents was having an affair?

Question

What did you do about it?
Did you tell your other parent?
How did it make you feel?
Is there ever any justification for a married person to have an affair?

Answer 1

Yes, it still is the worst moment I have ever had in my life and I am now happily married with my own family whom I could never imagine doing that to.
You know, I never did anything about it. I felt like I would be betraying the other person ( silly since they were the one betraying the whole family) I talked to my sister about it a lot. It just seemed to wierd that it was happening, I felt like we were in another world. My dad ended up finding out about it and it took it to a whole other crazy level with grandparents asking us if we were ok and all that stuff. It was strange. The whole perfect family ruined it seems. I still have hard feelings to this day and wonder about all of my moms moves. My parents are still together and I still feel sorry for my father. I don't think people realize how much it impacts everyone around them. No, I don't think there is justification for this to happen. If you have a very close relationship with your other parent and feel you have enough proof that is is a true accusation then you may want to say something. It is your personal choice... Good luck. If you have any more questions please let me know

Answer 2

Affairs are selfish and people always get hurt (even if it's a secret). Spouses make promises (marriage vows) to each other. When people have affairs promises to the spouse are broken. An affair is based on dishonesty. Even if people stop having an affair and get married they know the other person is willing to lie. Things may seem nice and fun on the surface but there are likely trust issues in the relationship. Getting married doesn't mean people are willing to sacrifice for a spouse. Lookup the words narcissism, egotism, and egoism on the Internet. Some people do marry the mistress after an affair. Most people never change their mindset and remain self centered forever.

Answer 3

My mom started having affairs at an age where I didn't understand it. I actually told my dad about the first one, but I was so young, I didn't really know what I was telling him.The affairs later in life always bothered me. It's hard to explain how that can make someone feel. I don't think there is any reason good enough to justify cheating =( I just don't....

Answer 4

Chances are that if a child realizes or suspects it, so does the Spouse. I did nothing when i suspected it. My parents divorced and they are both happier. I still have some issues with my dad..... but I honestly don't know if he cheated... if he did.... our relationship would suffer because not only did he cheat on my mother he cheated on me as well as my siblings. And there is never any justification for an extra marital affair. simply because you want someone else or you feel mistreated....if thats the case...LEAVE!

Answer 5

I don't think you should tell the other parent. I think you should tell the other parents parent. So if it's your mom that needs to know, you tell your grandmother. If it's your dad, tell your grandfather. Because they will know a good way to inform the parent of what's going on, and then you don't have to worry too much about the parent having the affair being angry with you. Because you don't want to be seen as taking sides, but parents always take sides so it's expected of them. I hope this helps. I wish you sunny days!

Answer 6

yes, and i minded my own business.

parents are human, they have their own problems... it's hurtful to the family when they have affairs or make mistakes... but it's THEIR problem, not yours.

you just happen to be a victim of their infidelity and stupidity.

if one of your parents is having an affair, the other parent probably suspects it anyway. let them handle their own problems.

about "justification" -- i think that if a person is that finished with a relationship, and have to go out and find someone else, they need to tell their partner first.... it's the right thing to do.

take care.

Answer 7

i know one of my parents is having aan affair and for that i just cant get that parent respect i dont do nothing about because im a child and that parent just wont listen and do what they want to do i did not tell my other parent because that parent once was doing it and may still be plus i just dont care for that other parent either i actuallly dont care what they do i not the one they are going to have to face they have to face god i mean i try to tell them but i just a kid its there life there decision and i guess most married couples start to early and are not ready for the commitment and get tired of commiting so cheat

Answer 8

Tell the other parent what you think is going on!
I dont think theres a justification for it.
but sometimes parents do WEIRD and gross things like
be a swinger. maybe the other parent already knows and its okay with them. but for your mental healths sake TELL HIM OR HER IMMEDIATLEY.

Answer 9

oh yes! my mom had an affiar on my dad for twenty five years. I never told my dad, cause it would have hurt him so badly. also, she had two other children from this man that my poor father thought were his. He died never knowing, and im glad i never told him. Was it the right thing to do? i dont know. but two wrongs dont make a right. good luck, and im sorry you have to go through this

Answer 10

i think, if i had reason to suspect, id talk to that parent first. theres not much you can do, its their decision, but if you really think you need to be told, talk to that parent, and ask them why. its something im sure theyll explain. also make it clear to them that you wont tell the other parent, but that you think they should do it themselves.

if this is something that is happening to you, or someone you know, i wish you the best of luck
*hugs*