One night my girlfriend and I off 2 1/2 years got into a fight at a party. When it came time to leave I could not find her. So I got a ride with a friend. I assumed since she was upset she went back with one of her girlfriends. The next morning she never came home until 9:30 am. Visibly upset I asked what she did and where she stayed. She immediatly lied to me and said she was at a friends house. Which I knew was not true. Cause I saw the her friend that morning. She instantly broke down and said she didnt know where she stayed and she was really drunk and cant remember. So after fighting all day she insists nothing happened and she just went to bed. A week later I get a note saying she lied about the night and she cheated on me with a high school friend. She said she was mad at me and he was there to comfort her and one thing let to another. Its the first time she has ever cheated on anyone. She is moved out, but we are trying slowly to make things work. Am I crazy?
2007-07-26 03:08:08 · 34 answers · asked by mxzxdoo 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Thanks for the great answers!! Things have only gotten worse. I have seemed to gotten past it, but she still cannot live with what she did. But most of you were right. I need to move on and forget about her. Thanks for the help!
2007-07-29 05:56:24 · update #1
Cheating is never an excuse. If she could go to such an extreme to seek revenge....My brother watch out!!! This is not the only time you are going to have a fight.Will she cheat on you every time you have a disagreement? The trust was broken more than once in this situation and I think I time for you to kick her to the curb.
2007-08-02 14:29:56 · answer #1 · answered by Gotta know for sure 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes and no. It hurts so much to know that the one personin the world you trust more then anything cheated. But if you can tell that she is truely sorry for it and if you really think that it will never happen again. Then try to put it past you and move on. The good thing is that you are not married and that would be alot worse to me if you were. Seeing as she was drunk when it happened does mean that she wasnt thinking clearly. The question is can you forgive and move on. If you cant it will not work out. Everytime you get into a fight you will always wonder if that is going to happen again. Sounds like she is really sorry for it and wont do it again. But your the one that has to put it behind you. I think I would try to make it work. You have gone too far with her to just say goodbye now. Good luck!
2007-07-26 03:16:16 · answer #2 · answered by Volsfan 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're not crazy at all. If you really do care about her, you can make things work out. The important thing is that she eventually told you that she had cheated, and felt sorry for what she did.
It's going to be really hard for you though, because that trust you had before will never be there again. But like I said, if you love her and care for her enough it will work out.
In my relationship, we had some cheating problems about 5 years ago - but we realized that we were right for each other and worked things out. Today it's going well - but it was a long, tough road!
Good luck in whatever you do!
2007-07-26 03:13:05 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I've never been a big believer in being able to move past these kinds of things. People say that they forgive the person but they bring it back up in arguments years later.
If you know that you can forget what she did, as well as forgive her, then that's something only you can decide. However, if you truly love her and you feel like you won't be able to get past this in your mind, I'd try to work on an amicable break-up. There's just no reason to end up hating each other because you're trying to force yourself to forget.
I'm very sorry for both of you.
Best of luck....
2007-07-26 03:14:02 · answer #4 · answered by hapetobme 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you crazy?.....yes....sorry, but YES you are crazy.
If she's the kind of person that behaves this way just because she's angry, then you are in for a lifetime of misery if you stay with her.
She's a poor excuse for a person, not to mention childish. Go find a good, decent and mature woman. Someone you can count on. It's easy to be trustworthy when things are good.....things are *not* always good in life. The test comes when things are not ideal....like with your fight.
What's gonna happen when you get her the wrong Christmas present, the wrong birthday card....you get red and she wanted blue. Is she gonna get ticked off, go out and get tanked again and sleep with someone? She sure knew where to go tho....didn't she? She just *had* to have that comfort.....one thing led to another...bullsh!t.
No no no no no.......you don't want this in your life. Sorry, but she showed you a part of her she shouldn't have......what 'lies' in her heart....(pun INTENDED).
Best of life and happiness to you my friend.
2007-07-26 05:00:48 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
no your not crazy at all. it's a good thing that she finally told the truth but it took a long time for her to do that. if she really wants u back u have to make sure she never lies to u again about stuff like that or u guys are through. or u could just stop everything and keep her out of your house. good luck ; ]
2007-07-26 03:13:30 · answer #6 · answered by Cherry fiz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nah, you aren't crazy. Take her back. She fessed up which I admire her for. She obviously didn't plan for it to happen, it just happened because you are a jerk (admit it). May I ask you this? Why are you just "friends" after 2 1/2 years? Marry the woman for crying out loud! I'm surprised she's still with you at all. She may be calling out for help and you are just standing there like a big dope!
2007-07-26 03:22:48 · answer #7 · answered by GunnyCee 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Drop the hammer...is it really that hard to not have sex outside of a 2 1/2 year relationship? Fight or not, drunk or not, no excuses...theres plenty of fish in the sea brother, go swimmin.
2007-07-26 03:16:17 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
no, your not crazy.
if the shoes would have been on the other foot, would you think that she would see things any differently?
next time, do her like her one night stand, have a booty call with her and tell her to be gone before the sun comes up, she'll then know how it feels.
also, need to find someone and have some fun, cause she sure as he*l did, your still young, so have some fun.
2007-07-26 03:16:02 · answer #9 · answered by james 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it sounds like the whole ordeal was in the heat of the moment. I would give her another chance. Try to be understanding, as much as i know it'll hurt. Anger and alcohol are a bad mixture. I hope you two work it out. Good Luck
2007-07-26 03:13:12 · answer #10 · answered by ralos2k3 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋