love? and the end of it?

Question

when you have already poured your heart out to someone and they still want to leave cuase there is someone else they are interested in yet you know you can make that person happier what do you do? i love my fiance and i messed up i told her how i feel she has cheated on me and i still love her. she told me she still loves me and is willing to give me a chance yet i am not sure how sincere she is sence i keep catching small lies. she told me she would have told me about them eventually but i am not sure. the only thing i am sure of is that i want her in my life nd still want to marry her. i am extreamly depressed and truely sad. what can i do to make this other guy seem like nothing compared to me? what can i do to make her want to truuely be with me? she admited to me last night she is still in-love with me yet she did go looking. i am hurt and confused please help. giving her up without a fight is not an answer. i love her and thats not going away.

we have a kid togather so no matter what we will always have to see each other but i know i can't see her with another guy. she said she cheated on me to get my attension plus she fully planned on leaving but now she is not so sure it is a good idea. all i know is i am maddly in-love with her and forgot to show her. i was a jerk for 2 years and made her do everything now all i want to do is spend the rest of my life making it up to her.

Answer 1

You have a fighting spirit. It is admirable. It's quite clear you love her with all the fiber of your soul. So you're correct in saying that there's only one good choice for you at this point.

I would submit, however, that in addition to your commendable maturity and vigor, fighting for someone must also give way to forgiveness, if we are to truly love. This is not the most masculine-sounding action, but you must forgive her if you are to have a future with her.

Then, if in the future she breaks your heart again, you have learned your lesson. A wise man would know when twice burned.

But you should not have this thought in your mind at this juncture. Banish it. Only forgive. Have your disposition be as pure as your love in this regard.

Answer 2

The end of an old love...is a new one.First of all you sound kinda insecure and inexperienced....is she your FIRST love by the way...thatswhy you keep hanging on and on.......You can NEVER make and force somebody to love you always and MORE than another person.......and what is this...She is WILLING to give you another try after she CHEATED on you should be the other way round to me.......The fact you are depressed and sad is DEEP DOWN you KNOW she is unreliable and your future marriage wont work but you are too scared to admit it cause you are afraid you end up MORE loney,hurt,sad and depressed You gotta ask yourself are you confident and strong enough to join the competition of other men and are you sure you will be the winner......Truth is if a person is IN LOVE they dont go looking around ,they wanna be with and stay with the one they love........forget the playgirls in this life

Answer 3

Mate, if i knew i would tell you too, all i know is i feel your pain, i still love my ex so deeply regardless of how heartless and cold he has been toward me since we broke up all those months ago. I know everyone will tell you to move on but it's hard to let go of someone you never wanted to lose in the first place, it's the worst feeling in the world and unfortunately we can't force them to come back or even care. In your case i would give her space for a bit and that might help her figure out what she wants, but i think if two people really love each other they make it work, best wait and see, if not try your best to move on as i am trying to do quite badly, goodluck.

Answer 4

I know exactly how you feel as my fiance' of 14 years is seeing someone else also, and it's killing me! What he keeps telling me is to back off so he can put things into perspective. We can't force them to love us. How would we feel if they only stayed out of guilt? I am just taking it one day at a time and I am not a very Godly person, but I am praying alot! Sometimes, if you love someone that much and they seem unsure, we have to let them go. Then they can figure out that we WERE the best ones for them. Good luck.

Answer 5

Nothing and I mean nothing good will come of a partner who loves a cheat and a lier. eventually it will eat you because there will be more lies and more cheating and guess who will be to blame. You. By her anyway.

Sought it out with her if you must bust she needs to be an open book to you a COMPLETE open book not just a partial one. Lay grounds rules about lieing or cheating and get the hell out of her life if she breaks them.

Frankly you would be an idiot to consider marrying her.

Answer 6

i think if you really love her you should fight for what you feel. If you feel that she's still in love with you and yet she can't avoid to look with other charming guys then make her realize that its a mistake if she'll ever let you go coz no one can give her the kind of love you're giving her.

Answer 7

maybe you should give her the space she might need right now...if you think that you'll make her happier in the long run, she'll figure that out. even if there's some short term pain right now, it provides for long term pleasure

Answer 8

sounds close to the story of my life, always loving, but never loved, or so it seems to me. Oh you really cant make someone love you, who doesn't. Its best to just move on and heal....

Answer 9

If she truely loves you all you did will be forgotten... Her love will hold true through all of it ... Have you ever heard once bitten twice shy ... be careful this time or you could loose her forever!!

Answer 10

Thats what it is u WAS a JERK to her 2 years.but still it can work it out,but if she isnt willing to and wants something else,theres nothing you can do it ...unless.........FIGHT FOR THE WOMAN YOU REALLY LOVE MAN...