what is it about men.. do you think they are all cheaters?

Question

do they lie,
are they always unreal
do you think we should trust men
are they worth the efforts that we gals give them

Answer 1

so I guess you've recently come out of a relationship that went bad or you're thinking about not being single anymore and had some bad experiences.

men cheat - women cheat. some of both actually dont - it seems few on both sides. many want open or casual relationships to the point to where they are then gtting worried about being aloone for the rest of their lives. mmm. bit self centred there, I can only hope such people only find thier mirrors, so as to not ruin the whats possible for those that want to share.
men lie - women lie, infact adults go out of their way to teach children to lie - even tho they dont recognise when they are doing this. whats lieing by the way, or whats tolerable? the number of little lies people say to make things smoother is quite incredible (rather than go through a short list of what they did between a and b or when asked how are you) so pretty much everyone lies, question seems to be what will they lie about and what can trust them to do - on an individual basis. I trust my ex to sleep with as many guys that she can for example, and to have little respect for anyone thats male as she comes from a background of female better than male philosophy (tho shes not bad at pretending otherwise for about a 2-3 weeks, that and she'll put it into actions rather than be honest)

are men worth the effort that gals put into men? Im afraid I havent come across a gal that puts any effort in to a relationship as yet. I wonder the same about women - and then I remember - not all are that way. the ones I've met so far have very diffrent wants to mine, so our efforts are being directed at diffrent things - so the relationship suffers because the effort being put in wasnt being reciprocated.

are men always unreal? umm well from the male perspective - women can be remarkably unreal too - I suspect that too an extent its part of the human condition - but then I've also manitained the perspectiv that men and women arent as diffrent (on somethings) as many would want to believe, tho there definately are diffrences.

btw your question is very elite-ist, it has the presumption about it that women dont lie, cheat or are unreal or that men dont put effort into realtionships. not many times in any individual example or an example through history has those sort of ways of seeing things served anyone well. I hope that its a case of you've just been hurt rather than following soe very silliy doctrine - because if you are, you wont find a man that wont cheat, lie or worth your efforts - namely because too many of your efforts will push him away (thats said it doesnt mean he'll cheat, but to be treat as though you will chaet because someone believes it will make it more tempting purely to be blamed for something you ahve done - and not because its his/her way normally)

you cant love while you hate - just like him. so if your not willing to let go of those ways of thinking - you might find a guy that initially tries, but he'll give up cos its not a case of gaining trust - it'll be a question of trrying to cahnge what you want to believe - in essence trying to change you (wrong in so many ways for either gender), and if he does you'll just dig your heels in more so.

that and perhaps your going for the wrong kind of men.
perhaps I've been going for the wrong kind of women in the past.

maintain in yourself the capacity to be wrong, that way its easier to forgive when you get it wrong, that way its easier to see when your wrong and you've blinded your self to what you need to see. that like so many things in life works two ways.

Answer 2

Not all men cheat, there are those who are serial cheats and do not need any reason to, with those ones they usually have a bad view of women in general and cannot be trusted. When I was in a relationship with someone many years ago I never strayed, I have values and morals. The point is not every man you meet are bastards and cheats, watch their behaviour and make judgements on what you see and hear, should you find tell-tale signs then quite simply dump him as he would not be worth hanging onto.

What you have to also remember is that it takes two to tango, usually if there is a problem within the relationship there could be a chance he may stray, but depends on how serious the problem is. Communication is absolute paramount in any relationship, this is the main cause of breakdowns in any relationship.

Finally, are they worth the efforts? Well I think some are, relationships sadly are controlled by the trial and error, you have to dip your toe in to find out how far to go.

Answer 3

Yes men lie. They are just different from women. Not wired like us I guess. I thnk you should trust a man if he has not cheated you and has been completely honest with you at all times. However, if he has lied to you and lied again inspite of you forgiving him then the chances are that he will lie again as he knows that he will be forgiven again. They usually also think that they are smarter than women so they think we wont find out.Which is not true. I somehow believe that a woman's gut feeling or say her sixth sense is so strong that if she smells something fishy, then it usually is the case. No its not worth your effort if you have caught him cheating on you. Talk to him one on one and tell him what you feel about his behavior. If his reaction is - denial, or repitition of the same behavior - then dump him. If he is really sorry, give him one more chance. It depends on whether how he cheated you. if you cant forget what happened and if forgiving him will cause you more pain then i wud say dump him. But if you have a big heart and can forgive and forget, then give your relationship another shot. All the best!!

Answer 4

Not all men cheat--not all men are liars--not all men are unreal--if you dont want to trust men, then dont trust men--some men are worth the effort, some men aren't.....NOW, substitute the word MEN with WOMEN---see what you get!? There is one thing that you women do very well when you have come through bad times with a man--you generalise and stereo-type all men. Get over it, there are plenty good, honest, decent men out there, not our fault that YOU pick the dingbats now is it!

Answer 5

well heres the thing, we have to trust that a guy isnt going to be all of those things when we begin a relationship. We dont know what someone is going to turn out like so we have to trust our instincts that hes genuine. Looks can be deceiving, he can be deceiving, or he could be the nicest guy in the world. Dont be bitter about past mistakes, dont look too hard to find someone, let it happen and see what starts from there.

Answer 6

Of course they're not all cheaters. Come on babe, you just go for the wrong types. Keep looking, you'll find a proper one...oh, maybe go for a different type from the ones you usually go for. Psychologically we are attracted to certain types of men. Some women are attracted to abusers etc. Try to conciously look for a different type and I'm sure you'll strike gold.....

Answer 7

I think all men have, in the back of their mind, a cheating mode... After that not all of them are cheaters but there always is a potential... As far as lying is involved, I would say most of them are liars, and in most cases bad ones!

Answer 8

Many of the aren't.

But what I don't get is that I watch them cheat all of the time. Then let his gf or wife cheat, and he acts like she is the worst person in the world. I just don't understand. I don't need to cheat, why do they? If they are cheating though and their gf or wife cheats, it should be equal. He should be able to forgive her because he was doing it too, but he won't. He just wants to call her names. What should she call him??

Thank goodness, it is not my problem. I would have told him to hit the road the first time I found out that he was unfaithful!!!

Answer 9

The decent ones r worth it......but its really tough tryin to find one! Took me a long time n kissed alot of frogs on the way chicks but i think i've found mr right! U will too no they eventually grow up and learn how to love a woman right believe me.........!! x x x

Answer 10

I wonder sometimes. Don't have much trust in them. I have heard too many times, "i'd never cheat on you." Yeah right. But how do we differentiate between the genuine and the not so genuine?