I have been married 19 years. Ever since my brother in law died 4 years ago, my husand has decided that he too is going to die young. He has become emotionally, physically, and sexually distant. He has his checking, savings and credit accounts...I have mine. He has assigned my bills(anything to do with the kids-education, medical, food, field trips and anything to do with my vehicle.) He comes in late from work, takes a shower and goes into the babies room to sleep in the recliner. He says I should be thankful because he snoars. He said the only reason we have been married so long is because he is nonconfrontational. So we never work out anything..because it is not up for discussion. The only reason I feel he is not cheating is because he has gained more weight to about 330. I feel like most guys that cheat would lose weight and exercise...
So would someone explain to me please what the difference is between a marriage and a roommate?
2007-07-25 11:09:17 · 7 answers · asked by Rebecca P 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Sounds like your husband is going through some major depression and you probably need to attempt to drag his booty to counseling or at least to the doctor. All of the actions you described (being distant from you, assigning you all of "your" things, taking care of things in case he isn't around anymore) are all red flags to suicide (I work as a prevention counselor).
His depression is causing him to be a roomate and not a husband...and there isn't much you can do about it until he confronts his problems. I'm sorry :(
2007-07-25 11:14:38 · answer #1 · answered by its about time 5 · 5⤊ 0⤋
right now your husband is behaving like a room mate..That's the most unfortunate thing about marriage. The fire starts to burn out after so long.. I don't care what any body here says. At one point in marriages that last long there is no intimacy and people just live as friends
2007-07-25 18:34:05 · answer #2 · answered by Na 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No difference in your case, however a healthy marriage with two committed partners increasing intimacy is the purpose of marriage.
2007-07-25 18:41:35 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
In your case, none. I have a real marriage to a real man, and that is not how we "roll".
Your husband needs a therapist, and possibly meds, and you both need marriage counseling. Life is too short to live that way. Best of luck.
2007-07-25 18:14:50 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
If he was your roommate you wouldn't feel guilt about making yourself happy and dating other people and going out with your friends and having a good time with out him. You might want to try counseling.
2007-07-25 18:16:28 · answer #5 · answered by Newly Eloped 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like he is happy, or at least contented and you're not. You have to decide whether this is acceptable or not. Try counseling first, and then move on.
2007-07-25 18:15:16 · answer #6 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
all married couples are roommates...but not all roommates are married couples...so, hang in there! you're commitment is the difference.
2007-07-25 18:23:16 · answer #7 · answered by d 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋