People say I've changed, and I know I have, but can't they just accept that I'm not the same as I used to be?

Question

I know I've changed a lot. I used to be a nice, giggly, hyper preteen, now I'm a quiet, stroppy, moody, argumentative teen. I understand this is probably normal, but my friends seem to hate the fact that I've changed, and this may be a selfish view point, bt if they're my friends, wouldn't they accept me for who I am, even if I have changed a bit?

Answer 1

It is wonderful that you accept yourself for who you are, and I understand when it comes to friends, it's hard trying to have them see yourself the way you do.

Don't be scared, it is not selfish a bit. Don't be selfish at times, we must learn to think about ourselves too. It is part of the whole process of growing up, and don't hold back. True, they are your friends, but if they were real they would accept you for who you are. It's normal, 'cause it's a fact when I say that they changed to. But if they do not accept you for you are, don't be afraid of trying to hang out with different people. We all grow, jumping from one group of friends to another. We can not hold on forever to the past, to the old version. Plus, changes make life vary.

Like you said, they seem to hate the fact that you changed. Straight up ask them if they like the new you, if they say no, then tell them that the old you doesn't exist anymore. Asking them would be the best approach that will secure you from misunderstandings. If they proove your thoughts to be true, then KNOW that they do not deserve you, and it's the truth.

Answer 2

HA! You would think. But ya know I think you are just finally growing up and challenging life more. I say that is a very beautiful thing. Instead of just going about life all giggly, and batting your eye lashes. I mean alot of girls need to realize this world is pretty damn harsh to us out here. You can't go around being a bobble head being all nice and things like that all the time.

Oh and because they are those type of friends, they will never accept the change in you as anything more than something negative. Because right now and at this age all the see is that you aren't like them. So this just goes to show you that, you need to expand your wings more and find real friends on your level. Because goofy little giggly girls will never accept who you are becoming, more like spread rumors about you over how you used to be like them. Which is even more pathetic. Congrats on seeing how the real world works.

Answer 3

I can tell you that my best friend has been my best friend since we were 15 years old. We are now 36 years old. She may not have always thought I was "peachy"....but she's stood by me however I was, and I KNOW a person changes a lot from the time you're 15 to 36. Tell your friends you don't know what's going on with you, but that you still love them and need them to put up with you while you're going through this phase. The ones that really love you will. (Unless you're being a real meanie butt, in which case, no one wants to be around a person who's negative ALL the time...cuz it brings them down too) My grandfather used to always say..."You find out who your true friends are when the hard times come. They're the ones still standing there when you have no money, and everyone else has their back turned to you."

Answer 4

If your friends are on the same age bracket as you do, they'll supposed to understand you but if not that causes the problem but don't worry even though they are or not at the same age bracket you don't have to explain the changes, time will come that they're going to accept the fact that you are still the same person, friend or whatever to them, you just transform a little bit. Become more wiser.
Good luck!

Answer 5

I had this happen to me. The fact is that EVERYONE changes. You've changed. Your friends have changed. Sometimes changes happen that make people less compatible. You are right that the best friends will accept you, changes and all. But if they don't, then it is time to move on and find new friends. It happens. That said, one friend I had that was frustrated when I basically grew up on him eventually came around and matured as well. We had a bumpy patch in our friendship back then, but got through and are still friends after 15 years.

Answer 6

well, why have you changed? what happened that resulted in your change of behavior?

im sure you can incorporate both your "old" & "new" self (the positive parts, at least). remember nobody likes an argumentative moody teen. be aware of what you say or do. just treat others the way you want to be treated. open up to your friends, and maybe theyll understand what youre going through.

Answer 7

The teenage years are a big time for change. There is a good chance that you will lose touch with your friends since you have changed so much. I wish it wasn't that way, but as a teenager, people tend to divide themselves into different social groups based on common traits and interests.

Answer 8

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Answer 9

Yes, friends accept you for who you are and who you want to become. It's totally normal for mood swings, and changes in your feelings during your teen years, especially the first years. Try finding people like yourself to be friends with. And also try to be understanding of your other friends too. They liked you for who you were before, but they don't like who you've become as much. A best friend will like you for who you are becoming as much as who are now. Unfortunatly it's harder to find true friends....

Answer 10

It could be because they are concerned for you...It seems as if you are the total opposite. If I were your friend, I would be concerned too. Even a true and accpeptable friend would be confused. It may be normal, but it woulndn't hurt to see if there is something more to your extreme differences. I would suggest going to your doctor.