Recently my partner myself and our 3 kids moved in with the paternal grandfather at his request to help him out.
He is a very nice man, and has all of his faculties, still works, drives etc., but their is a HUGE problem.
His lack of personal hygeine is AWFUL!
He insists on showering only once a week, rarely changes his clothes, he stinks, and it's really grossing us all out.
I have tried to talk to him about this, but he gets very insulted, and thinks that it is o.k.
We are extremely clean, and the smell permiates through my house, and no matter what I do it wont go away!
I walk behind him with clorox wipes, and lysol and wipe and spray what ever he touches.
I do my best to keep him out of the fridge by serving him.
He wants to eat in his room, and leaves a huge mess behind, but wants no one to clean it.
Today he literally smells like rotting cheese!
I am at the end of my rope!
What can I say to not hurt his feelings?
This is exhausting!
2007-07-25 03:28:00 · 9 answers · asked by charlie B 4 in Home & Garden ➔ Cleaning & Laundry
It is bad enough to have designated dishes, silverware, and cups.
His toenails are 3 inches long, so I called the V.A and made him an appt. for podiatry care.
He has money, but walks around looking like a bum.
When he DOES shower once a week, he uses a scrub brush, but I am sure he is not getting all of the hard to reach places.
This has gone BEYOND an offensive smell.
It is disrupting our daily lives.
P.S.S) He works in the food service industry.
2007-07-25 03:50:45 · update #1
Not easy at all. Like they say you can´t change a leopards spot´s , but don´t worry you can move them around a little. Okay you moved in with him, You are there to help in. You must set rules. yes it´s his house , but if he wan´t you to look after him then you have to have rules and stick to them. Sit down and speak with him, explain how you feel and say the thing´s you wish to change. If not then move out, if he wan´t to live in a stable& and walk around with is clothes dirty and himself un washed , then tell he can do it, but not whilst you are living under the same roof. I work with elderly people , if you want them to do anything , always ask the opposite of what you want, Old people in general , don´t like spending money either, the less soap you by the better, but if you tell them it was so cheap, they will tell you to buy more. So it´s not easy looking after elderly people, and always best to say the truth, No point in saying . Ah well he´s old , No. If you let him carry on doing the same thing´s , he will just think it´s normal. Set a few rules but in a nice way. Also he will will soon get the message when one of your children tell him or ask why he smell´s so bad.Good Luck,
2007-07-25 03:45:30 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Gross
2016-05-18 00:27:20 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh Ugh!! How horrible. I thought my Dads cigars were horrible, this is much worse.
I think this old dude has lost his sense of smell. It happens. Maybe he wants you all to leave!
Anyway....Maybe someone he trusts/likes could talk to him but unless you can force him to shower and clean up his act I don't think there is any hope.
2007-07-25 03:49:04 · answer #3 · answered by garden witch 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Even though you did it to help him out, you can't force him to change, the best option would be just to tell him that your moving out if he doesn't do some things to atleast live cleaner, if he takes a offence at it, just leave.
2007-07-25 03:38:08 · answer #4 · answered by Mark G 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to your husband, start packing and get out before you all catch something really nasty. I understand that you don't want to hurt his feelings but if you guys can't live together happily, everyone is just going to be miserable forcing it.
2007-07-25 03:48:33 · answer #5 · answered by MJ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He probably doesn't realize how bad he smells.He has acclimated to it. Call his Dr and see if he/she will talk to him about hygiene,Or call social services and see what they recommend. my mom had a relative that moved in with her and wouldn't bathe but 2 times weekly and had a bladder leakage problem she did not believe that she smelled and refused to wear something to catch her urine we spoke to her Dr and asked them to bring it up on her next visit,hearing it from someone else made her realize mom wasn't just picking on her. ( the Dr didn't mention to her that we talked to her.) If nothing helps.Move out,you moved in to take care of him if he won't let you ....leave. good luck.
2007-07-25 03:42:40 · answer #6 · answered by hankelmom 3 · 6⤊ 0⤋
Would you rather not hurt his feelings and put everyone at risk because of the lack of hygiene? Your kids partner and you are all at risk of many illnessess and sicknessess because he won't stay clean. So just confront him and tell him to clean himself so that yall dont suffer no more.
2007-07-25 03:36:02 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You moved in with him. So its hard to tell him what to do. I would move back out. You aren't going to change someone's habits that late in life.
2007-07-25 03:32:44 · answer #8 · answered by Hex92 5 · 5⤊ 0⤋
he's a grown man if he is old like you say move out and then get him a nurse to visit everyday!!
2007-07-25 04:59:56 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋