Aren't possessiveness and jealousy symptoms of selfishness?
Isn't selfishness incompatible with Love?
Wouldn't that mean monogamy is incompatible with Love?
(O.O)
2007-07-24 18:31:34 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
It doesn't mean monogamy is incompatible with love. You can choose to be monogamous for reasons that are not related to jealousy and possessiveness.
But you're right, most people in monogamous relationships are very jealous and possessive and that is counterintuitive to the idea of love.
I've been an open relationship with the person I love, and because we understand that we love each other and accept that fully, there were no problems with jealousy.
However, we have also been monogamous. Not out of jealousy, but simply a preference.
2007-07-24 18:36:02 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
In His word (bible), God tells us to be equally yoked when it comes to marriage. He also instructs men to love their wives and women to respect their husbands.
PRIOR to getting married, PRIOR to having sex, make of yourself the man that God intends. Then, chose a wife from among the women who have made of themselves what God intends. Only chose from amongst the women who are running as hard as you for this goal - that will leave you equally yoked.
Part of what you will give to her as a loving husband is the promise of monogamy. If she was wise and didn't "settle" for some guy who chases skirts but instead found a man after God's own heart, she will have no problem with being jealous or selfish for his attention.
Monogamy is an expression of love. It is not a cage of jealousy or possessiveness.
2007-07-25 02:13:02 · answer #2 · answered by teran_realtor 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You ask some crazy questions. No. Monogamy means you love some one more than anyone else, and they feel the same as you, and the two of you make an agreement to remain loyal to each other because of your overwhelming love. What's selfish is cheating on that person to make yourself feel good while breaking their heart.
2007-07-25 01:59:53 · answer #3 · answered by Matt 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, not really.
You can choose to be monogamous while still allowing your mate all the freedoms they wish, to be their own individual separate from you, without it becoming a matter of jealousy or possessiveness.
Maybe I'm just lucky and secure in my marriage - because I'm not jealous of other women - I know where he's coming home to by his own choice- and you can never really own another person. that I've always known.
2007-07-25 01:50:15 · answer #4 · answered by Cheese Fairy - Mummified 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
NO- monogamy is linked with the way that God wants us to live. True marriage looks to the other person's interest before our own. I have found in marriage, when I want him to supply all my needs, I am never happy, but when I start to look at his needs, and fulfill them, I become fulfilled too.
2007-07-25 01:43:34 · answer #5 · answered by AdoreHim 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
yes. Where there is freedom to have physical relationships with more than one, there is probably a far less likelihood of possessiveness and jealousy, but since we aren't there in society, it is just a guess
2007-07-25 16:51:13 · answer #6 · answered by Lady Morgana 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Monogamy is a Christian idea that comes from misinterpretations of verses written by bible authors who would have bet their lives on the belief that Jesus was to return in their lifetimes.
They were wrong and their devaluing of the importance of marriage was also wrong.
God has NEVER disallowed polygamy.
Christianity has not only disallowed polygamy but also divorce !!
Now anyone who divorces and remarries is comitting perpetual adultery.
.
2007-07-25 01:36:11 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
not necessarily. as long as there is trust, respect and equality, monogamy can work just fine. the moment any one of the 3 ends; split the sheets. because of the ego, human love is conditional; even in non-monogamist relationships. selfless love is non-conditional, but is also transpersonal.
2007-07-25 01:40:22 · answer #8 · answered by az grande 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
No I think you would have more examples of insecure people and acts of jealousy from polygomous relationships than monogomous ones... I am very secure in my relationship and have nothing to fear because it is monogomous...
2007-07-25 05:25:14 · answer #9 · answered by Abbasangel 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Go ahead have more than one wife. Don't forget I told you it is a bad idea.
If you cannot give all your love to a single woman, you are playing her. It doesn't make you more of a man, but less of one.
Plus one wife is enough. Trust me.
2007-07-25 01:51:14 · answer #10 · answered by great gig in the sky 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋