My roommate and I disagree about how to clean the common areas of our apartment. She believes dirty dishes (MY dishes) can sit in the sink for days on end, that clothes can be piled on our couch, and that the bathroom does not need to be cleaned weekly. Beyond that, I found her boyfriends' used CONDOM on my makeup case in the bathroom. That was the final straw. I decided that for one week, she was in charge of ALL the cleaning, including my messes, and then we would have a chat about compromise. I don't know if this will teach her anything. Am I being unreasonable? Should I just move out? Or should I try to be agreeable and find a happy medium?
2007-07-24 15:26:11 · 14 answers · asked by Diana Hussain 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Tell her that her messes are her responsibility and to leave your property alone. Express absolute disgust and hurt at her lack of respect by leaving the condom on your stuff. That's beyond rude and totally trashy. You live together, but you don't need to see that. I wouldn't put all of the chores on her because she sounds like the type of person who would let the mess accumulate then blame it on you. I'd sit her down and express that you are angry and you don't appreciate her leaving messes in common areas and that you would appreiciate if she cleaned up after herself at all times. Otherwise I would suggest looking for another place to live. Sloppy people are usually rude and unagreeable. Good luck.
2007-07-24 15:48:23 · answer #1 · answered by dolce 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You definitely should come to an agreement about the common areas (and a used condom on your property doesn't belong in the "difference of cleanliness" opinion - that's just down right nasty and rude!).
It's one thing for her to live in a mess in her area, but it's unreasonable for her to expect you too as well. You may have to close your eyes to some of the mess and she may have to step up to a regular cleaning schedule.
If you can't come to a compromise, one of you will have to either move out or you'll have to tolerate her habits.
Good luck!
2007-07-24 22:34:45 · answer #2 · answered by TC 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am in the same boat! Before trying to make her do the chores all week sit down with her and try to work out a cleaning schedule with her. If she can't clean up after herself then send her packing, or tell her that if you have to do all the house work her rent will increase by 20 bucks for every chore you have to do. I am counting down the days til i get rid of my deadbeat roommate and i know exactly how you feel.
2007-07-24 22:38:27 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
EEEWWW I would have freaked out if i found my roommates b/f's used condom on somthing of mine, people six blocks away would have heard my screaming, then i would have thrown up and she would be buying me a new makeup case and make up. but once i got past that i would have done the same and then found a happy medium. setting up cleaing charts might help. one week you do the dishes or something else and she washes the clothes, or something, and then switch off. and as for guests if they mess it up who ever's guest it is is responsible for that guest's mess (IE the used condom issue.) and that was just LAZY and NASTY of him as if he couldnt get it in the waste bascket (you arent suppsed to flush condoms)
2007-07-25 08:58:34 · answer #4 · answered by shug 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A sink full of dirty dishes is a huge source of bacteria. The condom is disgusting and also a source of diseases. Dirty clothes on the couch are sloppy. I say "Dump this girl" or "Move out".
2007-07-24 22:48:26 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
These are issues you discuss before you choose a roommate not after. I learned this the hard way so many years ago. You aren't changing his/her habits after the fact if they weren't agreed upon prior when you had a choice to say no. If you cannot talk these things out and come to agreement about standards then someone is moving. I made a decision to not have roommates and life got easier before I married.
2007-07-24 22:40:10 · answer #6 · answered by dawnb 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I would talk to her and try to set some ground rules.
If things don't change (and they probably won't), then while you are looking for another place or roommate, put her messes (dirty clothes, dishes, whatever) on her bed. Tell her if she can't clean your dishes, she can't use them and let her get her OWN dishes (or advise her to use paper plates, etc). If she still messes your dishes, hide them in your room.
2007-07-24 23:58:11 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You aren't being unreasonable, especially in regards to the used condom in your makeup case.
2007-07-24 22:32:54 · answer #8 · answered by retrodragonfly 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I draw the line at hazardous waste. I would find a new roommate or apartment.
2007-07-24 22:47:48 · answer #9 · answered by maigen_obx 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
just have her clean up her own messes and you clean up yours.
if she doesn't want to clean up, just ignore it. don't satisfy her by cleaning it up.
if she lets things get out of hand, give her a good talk and say that it needs to stop and she needs to grow up. you could threaten her with kicking her out, but make sure she doesn't call your bluff (if you don't want her out. if you do, then go ahead!)
2007-07-24 22:45:19 · answer #10 · answered by rubyslippers93 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋