What is the policy in the Mormon LDS Church for baptizing minor children who have divorce parents?

Question

Joint legal custody -- one parent mormon, the other not. What is the Mormon LDS Church Policy for baptizing the children?

The physical custody is with the parent who is not Mormon and the visitation is granted to the parent who is Mormon.

Please advise on policy and procedure if you have direct knowledge or can quote out of the church policy handbook.

If the policy handbook is online, please let me know how to find it. Thanks!

Answer 1

If both parents have equal custody, they both must consent. If custody is not equal, the parent with the more custody has complete say. The other parent has no say.

Ultimately, If you don't believe in the LDS Church, why would you believe that the baptism does anything good or bad? If you do believe then it is very important.

A child will not be baptized against his/her will.

Answer 2

There's no such thing as a "policy handbook" other than the scriptures (which are accessable through the official website linked below.)

However, it takes only the permission of ONE parent when the parents are divorced for the child to be baptized and that parent does not have to have physical custody. This happened with 2 of my nephews. My brother is a member and their mother is not and she didn't want it to happen, but it could, and did, because my brother gave permission and he did not have custody. The child is interviewed by the Bishop/Branch President to determine whether or not the child understands what he/she is promising when they are baptized. They are simply promising to follow the commandments of God and to live a Christlike life. If the child later determines that they do not believe what they have been taught, they are free to leave and can have their names removed from the church records as a member.

However, check out the official church website below where you can search out any word or phrase and find what our leaders have said on any subject.

Answer 3

Makes me wonder what your friend did so that his wife left in such a big way and seems to be protecting the kids from him. Sorry to be harsh but there is no logical reason she would suddenly keep the kids from their dad when he was in their lives every day before. If he is serious and not hiding any really bad behavior on his part he should file a petition for an emergency order for shared custody for the summer immediately. If they have been separated since February I do not understand what the deal is since they could be going toward a finalized divorce by now. I feel something else is happening and he has abused his wife or kids and that is why she had to get away from him. If his kids are not little then maybe they don`t want to see him and she is trying to not be forced to tell him that. Sorry.

Answer 4

Legally speaking, when a child of divorce is with a parent, that parent has sole right to train the child religiously however they want as long as the child is with them. I'm not sure what the churches stance is on that, but yes there is a policy handbook, and you would find it very hard if not impossible to get a copy and read it. It is not available to the general public.

Answer 5

You would have to talk to a Bishop or Stake President about what is in the handbook. It is not published and is only available to those who make the decisions.

It is my understanding that both need to approve in joint custody. If there are exceptions it would have to come from writing to the General Authorities. The Church doesn't want to get into the middle of a parental battle, so the reason would have to be pretty significant.

Answer 6

No direct knowledge.

joint custody -- both parents must OK the baptism! The rights of the parents are absolute, if the parents can't come to some agreement then the church will take no action.

D

Added:
CM there is a handbook for bishops and stake presidents -- and it's thick. that is so they don't have to call up the line of authority all the time.
Now whether it addresses split custody baptism requirements -- I cannot say (I've never been a bishop) -- but there is a hand book.
D

Answer 7

This question hits close to home for me.

I am a divorced LDS father with a daughter from that marriage. My ex was a professed Christian, but has become an atheist/Unitarian Universalist to appease her new boyfriend.

The ex will not consent to the baptism, so my 8 yr old daughter cannot be baptized. I discussed it at length with my bishop.

I was told by the Bishopric (and there may be scripture on the subject) that the burden of her salvation falls on my ex's failure to allow something that doesn't impinge on her faith, since she has none. In our church, there is no such thing as a Church Policy handbook.

I was baptized as a Baptist when I was 13 without my father's consent, so I do know that other churches allow baptism w/o consent of both parents.


Denying a child eternal salvation because of lack of belief in Christ is the most vile act that one can do to your own child. Not only religiously, but also to the father trying to build a new family founded on the teachings of Christ. I struggle every day to understand her decision, given the other parent's lack of faith. Not allowing baptism takes away a child's right to be closer to his/her earthly family and Heavenly Father.

Answer 8

Atomzer0 has it wrong. The Handbook of Instructions (v.1) says that both "parents with custody" must consent. There is no mention of the custody being equal or that a judicial allocation be made of rights with respect to religious training. If a parent has not had his or her rights terminated, then he or she must consent.

Answer 9

both parents must consent the baptism if the child is under 18.
I've had several friends whose children had to wait to get baptized because one spouse (who didn't have custody) didn't give the okay. If you're in doubt, I'd ask your bishop.

Answer 10

both parents have to consent