When do you normally give a babyshower? What if it is a foster parent with a very good chance of adopting? My friend wants a shower but doesnt want to wait for the adoption to be final because it takes so long. Is there a customary timeline for this? I don't know the first thing about giving a babyshower - any suggestions?
2007-07-24 07:53:22 · 10 answers · asked by Heather24 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adoption
A little bit of a different perspective I guess.
Maybe instead of calling it a baby shower, call it something else. Like a Foster Parent Celebration Shower.
While the first placement, or second, or third, may not end in an adoption, one may. And regardless they will still need all the items that a new parent needs. Think of not having nine months to purchase all of that baby equipment. It is quite expensive for foster parents in the beginning. If they have decided that they will only be taking a newborn to three months, then you all basically know what she needs.
Go in on a crib, a stroller, a carseat, a baby tub, unisex onesies, or gift certificates, a high chair, a Billlibo chair, they won't need formula but will need bottles, toys.... educational toys are fabulous!!! A pack and play. Those types of things.
Adoption sometimes takes up to two years. At that point, who is going to give them a shower? And what would you get them? It will mean so very much for you to celebrate with her on this joyous occasion.
2007-07-24 22:36:46 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had my baby shower about a month before I was due. I can understand your friends excitement but why have a baby shower so early and then have all that stuff in the house and waiting to be used - it would just make me more anxious. I don't know the circumstances of your friends adoption but having a good chance of adoption is not the same as delivering a baby - when your pregnant you know you'll be bringing home a little baby (as long as there is no complications) but with adoptions there are so many factors in play and I wouldn't want to have a shower until I was absolutely sure the child was going to be mine. One thing I do know is in the U.S. the birth mother does have a certain amount of time to change her mind and take the baby back, that limit is different from state to state but like I said I would want to make sure the baby was legally mind before I had a shower.
2007-07-24 08:00:44 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I would wait until the adoption is final because it would be heartbreaking to have a big party and then find out the adoption went wrong. Usually, baby showers are given 1 or 2 months before the baby is due. There's no reason why you can't wait until the baby comes home and have a huge party then.
2007-07-24 07:58:10 · answer #3 · answered by Precious 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Wait until it is legal.. I have adopted and am a foster parent and have seen a lot of different things happen in court with kids.
2007-07-24 11:25:04 · answer #4 · answered by shortansassy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A baby shower is something that is given to the expectant mother, not something she asks for. It's not up to her to decide, it's up to whomever is planning it. You should probably wait until after the adoption is final and everythings signed. Until then, nothing is set in stone.
2007-07-24 08:56:38 · answer #5 · answered by Dream_Weaver 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would suggest waiting until the adoption is final, even if your friend doesn't. SO much can happen between now and then, and you want your friend to feel HONORED, not ashamed.
I would talk with her and ask her to wait until it's getting closer. As the family gets closer and closer to the adoption date, they will probably be more and more excited. Use THAT excitement, not this priliminary excitement.
2007-07-24 07:57:47 · answer #6 · answered by FaZizzle 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Once the baby is officially 'placed' for adoption would be the best time (yeah, it takes a year in many places for it to be final).
2007-07-24 07:58:25 · answer #7 · answered by CarbonDated 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I would wait at least till the birth parents rights are terminated because after that it is just a question of court date
2007-07-24 08:03:55 · answer #8 · answered by Done 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
wait for the adoption to be final, until then everthing is in limbo some people do change their minds then it can destroy the adopting parents
2007-07-24 15:08:37 · answer #9 · answered by c504play 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can do it after the baby is there that way every one will know what to get cause then that would suck if you throw her a party and then the adoption doesnt go good and they dont get the kid,that would suck
2007-07-24 11:01:01 · answer #10 · answered by laura m 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋