My bf has been in and out of jail since we started dating in 2004 and we have 2 kids he hasen't made a effort to support us. Were still living with my parents.Everytime i start my schooling he always wants me to be there for him and I missed almost a year of school just cause he asked me to and if i don't he thinks im messing around or i dont love him So should i stay with him or should i move on and start a new life for my babies.................But. ... I Love him very MUCH
2007-07-24 06:16:29 · 25 answers · asked by Mama Me 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Boot him yesterday.
2007-07-24 06:19:32 · answer #1 · answered by Mike M 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Move on. Your boyfriend is holding you down and that is not setting a good example for your kids. Give your kids a fresh start. He isn't doing anything with his life and its shedding on yours. You may love him, but he should love you enough to do his part as a father and boyfriend. He should love you enough to change his ways for at least your children. He's clearly not making an effort. Get your education, be a good mom, support your kids, and set a great future for you three. He is never going to change and if he does its on his terms. Maybe, one day, he'll see how much good you made out of this situation. He might get the picture. However, don't wait up for him and get your life together. Good luck!
2007-07-24 13:24:18 · answer #2 · answered by criesunjust 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
girl im sorry to say this but i think u only THINK u love him. Youve got 2 kids right now and he reallly isnt making the effort to care for them OR U. if he really did have feelings for you or u kids he wouldve straightned out by now. YOU have to go ur own path and reallize that u should start sumthing better for the sake of your kids and YOU. hes not the only guy in this world and their is still a chance for you! you need to get urself moving open your eyes get out find a job, be happy with the job you have because if your not ur not happy wit ur life. so find a job that u love find an apartment or house so u can take ur youngsters with you. Im sure that if you talk to your parents they will agree with you and even help you. ALSO EDUCATION IS most important part of your life. AND IF he thinks your cheating on him while your sacrificing your education to see his dumbass then he isnt really paying attention and hes not giving you the respect you deserve!!
2007-07-24 13:24:50 · answer #3 · answered by Squishy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not meaning to be rude, but stop being an IDIOT! Unless you had twins, I can't believe any woman with half a brain or any self respect would spawn more than one kid from such a loser (assuming the first was an "oops").
Get your self together, get your life on track, and leave that loser behind...if you don't care about yourself, then do it for the kids who didn't get to choose their parents.
I doubt what you feel for him is love at all, but some kind of unhealthy dependancy...he certainly doesn't love you or the kids (not much anyway) or he'd get his shiot straightend out and try to be a good partner, parent, and role model. That doesn't appear to be on the agenda however...move on.
2007-07-24 13:22:36 · answer #4 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom.
Mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power"
with that being said, please let that person go. Anyone and I mean anyone who thinks someone is messing around in a relationship cannot be trusted. They themselves are guilty of the same crime. When someone loves..........they want the very best for you. He would want you to finish school, he would be patient..........but from what you r saying he is a big baby that can't get his own act together.........I understand that you love him and that's fine if he treats you like a princess meaning he's gentle, sweet and dedicated maybe you can consider communication between the two of you.....
But unless he starts to focus on what he needs to do to get your own place for you and the children and stop being so insecured in the relationship then unfortunately for him and for your own sake, there's only one thing you can do
Move on with your life, you can do it. I have four children and I did it on my own, I got my education a good job and today my children thank me for it and now they help me.
You don't have to put up with anyone irresponsibilities.
You love him, but does he loves you? really.
Ask yourself, do you want someone who can't stay out of jail to be part of your children's lives, what will your children learn from this.? What kind of influences do you want for your children to absorb?
2007-07-24 13:36:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kick him to the curb you may love him but it doesn't seem he loves you or he would understand how important school was to you. Your kids should be your 1st priority and boyfriend is not very good example going in and out of jail.
2007-07-24 13:22:41 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You love him very much but he's a selfish individual. If he wasn't selfish he'd put you and the children first and wouldn't bounce in and out of jail so often. Go to school so that when he does leave because he will someday by choice or prison most likely....you can provide for your children.
2007-07-24 13:21:22 · answer #7 · answered by i_b_winkn_at_u 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
as said many times before...
THERE ARE OTHER FISH IN THE SEA...
I had a guy almostlike that(except with out the kid situation)
I understand you love him but you might have to let him go, one step at a time...
the first step, is to TRY and get out and find another guy who can occupy your mind from your current love.
Thats what helped me. I was in COMPLETE LOVE with this guy so much, that anyone could have offerd me a million dollars and i probably would have turned it down. But once i found this one guy who supported me as a freind , i began to let go.
Also, it seem as if hes not supporting you or your kids then what is he doing, stressing you out? keeping you from america's key to succsess(an education)?
It wont be easy and for me it to almost 2 years but if you come to realize how unhelathy he is for you, then maybe you go out and find someone more reliable...Good luck hun'
2007-07-24 13:36:29 · answer #8 · answered by Ashley C 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him with your kids and start a new life without this bum. In and out of jail, and not supporting his kids, plus mooching off your parents?? This guy is a loser, with a capital L. Dump him and start over, you deserve so much better than him. Complete your schooling, too.
2007-07-24 13:21:08 · answer #9 · answered by makeloans2 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
dang and you have stayed long enough to have two kids with this guy....well for one thing he don't have much respect for you or your kids...how can you love some one that treats you like this....if he wont take care of you and the kids he don't love you he is a mooch and if your parents are having to take care of you and the kids that is sad.. well if he can treat you like this he is cheating on you also....dam wake up he don't love you or he wouldn't do you this way....when you love someone you want the best for them and to take care of them and he ain't doing neither. you can have a lot better life with out him....sounds like your with out him most time anyways except when he needs you for sex or money or something to eat...think of you kids get away from him and give them a better life than he ever will....he is sorry and a bumm
2007-07-24 13:27:50 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
LEAVE HIM! You may love him, but if he loved you back he would want what's best for you and would make an effort to change He sounds overly possessive...and you now that you have kids, you need to have their best interest in mind. They need, at the very least, one devoted parent...and you can't do that if you're constantly running around trying to please him.
2007-07-24 13:23:44 · answer #11 · answered by crissangel 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋