Is it tacky to ask friends and family for donations?

Question

My daughter was selected to dance in the Macy's Thanksgiving parade this November. It is an expensive trip and she has been doing some fund raising but we have a long way to go. We just sent some letters to local businesses but we were also considering sending a letter to family and friends asking them to donate. Is this tacky?

Answer 1

No, asking your friends and family to help with the expenses is OK.

Performing in the Macy's parade is kind of a once-in-a-lifetime thing - so you're not asking for money for something that any kid should be able to do on his/her own.

The weekend before Thanksgiving, hold a party for all those who donated to her trip as a means of thanking them for their donations.

I live in a rural part of the country where people don't have a lot of money. Very often the community will sponsor ham/bean suppers with charity auctions for causes like this.

Ask the church for a special collection one Sunday. Or maybe they can sponsor a gospel sing to raise money for her trip.

Local fair/festival queen candidates and special needs cases often put charity cans in local businesses.

Yard Sales, Bake Sales, etc. etc. can bring in a few bucks too.

It won't hurt to ask the local police or fire department for help. There was an Olympic speed skater from a small town in Illinois who was sponsored by the county police dept. She was billed as "the county's favorite speeder"

IF, through her hard work and good efforts, she should earn MORE money than she truly needs for the trip - then perhaps she could SHARE her earnings with a member of her troupe who wasn't quite as successful a fund-raiser as she was.

Good luck!

Answer 2

It would depend on what you are asking for.

Sence your not asking to bail someone out of jail who doesn't deserve to be bailed out.

I think you are just fine in asking. It's not like they wont see her, this will also give those a heads up to make sure to watch the show to see her dance. I wouldn't ask for a donation amount per say. I would just ask for any monitary donation. And maybe make a meter of where you are in donations as of the date of the letter, and where you need to get to by when. And as people send you money send a thank you card with where their donation brought you up to in the meter. And a polite reminder to make sure to watch the thanksgiving day parade in November.

Good luck! and congrats to your daughter

Answer 3

Instead of asking for money outright, why not ask them to help with a fundraiser? Asking for money for this event is indeed tacky and would put friends and family on the spot ... some of whom may not be able to afford even a nominal donation at this time.

Ask all of them to help with some fundraiser - be it a car wash, spaghetti dinner, pancake breakfast, silent auction, walk or race, etc., and most likely you will get donations in lieu of help. This way you are not asking for the money directly, you are asking for someone's time, which these days is even more valuable, and they may be more willing to open their wallets instead of giving their time.

Good luck.

Answer 4

I don't think so. If you don't have the financial means and need help, then ask. This could be a one time opportunity for her and you want to let her participate. Try to find any way you can to raise the money.

If you were looking for donations so you could buy a new iPhone that's a big no no. This is a worthy cause to ask for donations.

Good luck, I hope she gets to go!

Answer 5

I think it is. It's one thing if it's a family crisis or medical emergency. It's another if it's a privilege (no matter how important it is to her). I'm fine with looking for a family sponsor, but asking personal friends and family is like asking for a gift. A gift is always offered, not requested.

I would look for other avenues. What is your daughter doing? I don't know how old she is, but if she is healthy and of age, she can work extra hours. Do you belong to an organized religious group like a church or temple? I would do a web search on fundraising ideas, and I'd ask other families that are going how they're paying for it.

PS
If friends and family already know about it and haven't offered, I think it's a safe bet they might be offended.

Answer 6

I'm torn on this one. On one hand, your friends and family should know that she has been chosen for this honor and would probably offer to help out if they felt they should. However, they may not realize that you have to pay for so much yourself.

I wouldn't send them letters, I would call or visit them and just casually bring up that she was selected and that you are trying to raise money. I wouldn't actually come right out and ASK for the money. That's just me though.

Good luck!

Answer 7

This is a tough one for you. In my case, if a family members did NOT ask me for a donation, I would feel a bit hurt. I think it is more than OK but obviously there is a diversity of opinion.

Answer 8

Personally, if a family member asked me for a donation for something like this i would be offended. Especially with the cost of everything going up.

It would be completely different if it was a medical emergency, but like someone else said she could be doing chores and helping earn the money herself.

Answer 9

Unless you know that friends and family might be reluctant to offer, or cannot because of finances, I'd say it would be tacky of you to ask.

Many families have sons and daughters that they would like to have participated in like-minded activities, but have not because of finances. When in doubt, do not ask because it is the responsibility of the parents to raise their children--not others.

Answer 10

If you don't want to ask for donations from family and friends....Maybe you and your daughter could provide some services (mopping, washing cars, running errands, etc.) for donations.