She would like to know what would be the polite thing to do. Send him a letter telling him about the wedding, or go ahead and send an invitation even though he won't be able to come. The last thing we want is for him to hear second hand from my fiances aunt. How should we handle this ?
2007-07-24 03:18:42 · 11 answers · asked by clint m 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
My suggestion is for you to send him a letter telling him of the good news and let him know that you know he can't attend but you wanted to share your joy with him. Enclose an invitation so he can see it. And maybe promise to send a photo after.
I believe he will appreciate the gesture.
2007-07-24 03:23:23 · answer #1 · answered by Rita 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
If I were you, I would write (or have my fiance write) a nice long letter all about how you're getting married and how happy you are together. Tell him how you wish he could be present for the event, but promise that you'll have plenty of video and pictures to show him when he is released. Enclose an invitation just so he feels a part of things, maybe with a little note attached that says "Wish you could make it!" or something similar. Also, after the wedding, send him some pictures of everyone in the ceremony so he can see all his family members, as well as the happy couple. The most important thing to incarcerated family members is that they don't lose touch with people and things on the outside, and if you show him that he is included in the only way he can be, it will brighten his day.
2007-07-24 10:39:19 · answer #2 · answered by fizzygurrl1980 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would send him a note like Greeneyes suggested. Don't send him an invitation when you know there's no way he can attend - it's not like he just lives across the country or something. I found out recently that a very good friend of mine is getting married in a few weeks - because I live 6 hours away (by plane), there's no way I could attend (cost-wise). She knew this and didn't invite me and not only that, hasn't told me about the wedding "to spare my feelings" (we have mutual friends who I found out through). This ended up hurting my feelings even more. Please tell him before the wedding. At the very least it's a nice gesture. (But again, no reason to send an invite.)
2007-07-24 11:07:15 · answer #3 · answered by tink 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Send him a letter telling him about the upcoming wedding. Tell him that you are sorry he wont be able to attend but if he would like you would be glad to send him some pictures of the wedding. Then follow through with his wishes.
2007-07-24 10:23:56 · answer #4 · answered by dave n 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well since he will not be able to attend. I would send him a letter letting him know about the wedding. Then let him know that you will send him wedding photos so he can see the big day.
2007-07-24 10:45:09 · answer #5 · answered by Va princess 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Send him a note letting him know about the wedding. Don't send an invite.
After the wedding, send him a picture of the event and let him know you missed his presence.
2007-07-24 11:19:52 · answer #6 · answered by Collette L 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Send him a wedding announcement after the fact. Why invite him to something he cannot attend? I seems like it would just makes him feel worse that he's in jail.
2007-07-24 10:22:07 · answer #7 · answered by melouofs 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, you can guess what his RSVP is going to say.
I would send him the invitation with a letter inside telling him you thought he might like the invitation to save.
2007-07-24 10:22:59 · answer #8 · answered by daljack -a girl 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
We actually had a similar situation. We sent an invitation with a handwritten note enclosed that said something along the lines of "you'll be very missed at our wedding." We also didn't enclose an RSVP card or return envelope.
2007-07-24 10:21:55 · answer #9 · answered by greeneyes_bjb 6 · 7⤊ 1⤋
congratulations on your upcoming wedding!
i like daljacks answer. even though he cannot attend, he still might like to receive the invite. it will let him know that you are thinking of him. although he won't be there in person, i'm sure he'll be thinking of you both and wishing you well.
2007-07-25 00:15:47 · answer #10 · answered by ♥ cat furrever ♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋