My fiance who I love very much and have been living with for 2 years is getting bored. She thinks we need to have more of a life outside of each other. I have hundreds of friends, but no one is close, and the few close ones, I cant ask. She wants me to see other women, four to be exact, in exchange for her seeing one. She does not have someone in mind and neither do I. She wants to keep our relationship and marry me, but wants this time apart. She has "taken a vacation from life" this week and moved to her friends house for the week. I miss her. I dont know if I can handle being with another woman. All of my game is long gone, i think. Anyway, help me out, what do you think?
2007-07-23 23:46:58 · 16 answers · asked by hatediminishes 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Many people like one last harrah, though usually its not thier last, this will probably come up again, and again and again. If you dont want to see girls dont. If you dont care that she has her harrah's now and again your set. Otherwise you two got some serious talking to do.
2007-07-23 23:50:46 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your relationship is over. For whatever reason, she isn't interested in being married to you at this time.
She is correct in that you should have a life outside each other. Women, especially very feminine women, get bored with men who want to spend all their time with them. If she is the center of your life, you will "chase her away." The best thing you can do is tell her the engagement is off. Tell her you realize that it's not going to work, and then go do something else. Reastablish your sense of self, and your relationships with male friends. Whatever you do, don't take her back, at least not for a long time (a year?)
Go find a woman who's interested in you, and when you find her, don't center your world on her. Regardless, keep in mind that marriage is supposed to be forever. If after two years, she has so little respect for the commitment she was supposed to be making by accepting your proposal, how do you expect to make it to ten years, let alone 40?
2007-07-23 23:59:57 · answer #2 · answered by LT Dan 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People who are in love do not take "vacations" from each other, somethings wrong here.
I think your girl friend is just tired, if married would be having an affair which she openly asks you for, she's honest about it anyway.
In return she wants you to do the same to what? take away the guilt. This happen to me also many years ago, I couldn't handle it. The "other guy" offered his wife, and she, being angry at him, offered herself to me but, I refused and told them both to hit the road.
I think you need a break alright, from this women. She openly has rebuffed you and told you she wants someone else. This relationship is not only on the rocks but, has sadly ended, the fat women has sang her sad song but, you can't hear it.
I would forget her, tell her she can have whatever she wants but, your all done, you'll go it alone and find someone when you feel like it, after she's gone, when the time is right, not at her option.
2007-07-23 23:57:36 · answer #3 · answered by cowboydoc 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're clearly wanting a committed relationship but she's having cold feet. Her offering you 4 girls for her one (I assume you meant guy) tells me she's trying to talk you into something you don't want to do. The way I see it you've got 2 choices. Wait for her to decide whether or not she's ready for commitment, or get rid of her and find a woman who knows she is. I know love makes it much more complex than that, but this is what it boils down to.
Quite frankly her saying she still wants to marry you but wants time apart says she wants her cake and to eat it too. Take a look at where this is leading your relationship. Very bad sign.
As a good compromise you could ask her to go into couples counseling.
2007-07-23 23:55:53 · answer #4 · answered by Lee 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi sweety, im sorry to break it to you, but it seems like she wants "out". I know this is the last thing you want to hear, and im sure you wanted to hear, its all good, its only a break.
But if she wants to see other people, she doesnt love you enough. She wants you to see other people, so she wouldnt feel as guilty.
I believe she is already seeing other people, maybe just one, thats taken her attention from you.
I say give her space, and give her time, to realize whata great guy she has, or "had".
Please dont be needy, calling her and msging her all the time, as she clearly wants time apart.
Please refuse to see her, because you're not someones left over. You're a great guy, that deserves a girl that would treat you like her king, not a part time lover. Okay...
I know its easier said than done, but you will thank me.
She will regret going on a "break" - only if you ignore her, turn your back, break up wit hher, and find someone else. She will die of jealousy and will beg your forgiveness.
2007-07-23 23:52:58 · answer #5 · answered by Kendi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry but what she is doing is trying to soften the blow, and maybe doesn't even realize that she is doing it....thats why her behavior says I want out, but she is saying she still wants to marry you. If she is bored after two years of being together and needs to sleep around, what makes you think 5, 10, 16 years from now she isn't going to go through this again. Start preparing yourself for the end because it is coming. I'm sorry, I know this sucks for you. I hope you will be ok.
2007-07-23 23:52:00 · answer #6 · answered by Sherri 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm do you support her financially? If so she has probably just found an awesome loophole.. she can have sex with someone other than you, but you get to take care of her! Dump her as fast as you can.. doesnt it make you feel low that she wants to sleep with someone else? And you seriously cant be so gullible as to think that she doesnt have anyone in mind.. haha yeah I bet she doesnt! Keep your dignity and move on..
2007-07-23 23:55:48 · answer #7 · answered by meeeeeeeee2681 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What a very bizarre request from your partner spesh when she say she still wants you and to marry you! Is this just a request to be unfaithful??? I'm just thinking how I would feel if my partner was saying this to me... I would think it just an excuse to be unfaithful, if you are with someone that you love madly why on earth would you want your partner to sleep with other people so that you could do the same???
2007-07-23 23:54:34 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It would be better for you to take a long vacation my your self than bring a girl into your marriage home, that's' going to leave a mark in the relationship
2007-07-23 23:54:37 · answer #9 · answered by 結縁 Heemei 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think she wants out of your relationship and you seeing other women will make her feel better about leaving. Time to face reality and get ready for the break up.
2007-07-23 23:52:14 · answer #10 · answered by jingles 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋