My boyfriend, a roomate and I share a 2 bedroom apartment. The first week of June, my boyfriend's mother asked if her and her 10 year old son could stay with us for a few days while she got some medical testing done locally. Of course, we were more than happy to have them visit. After 3 days, they left. All was wonderful. As they were leaving, we were informed that they would need to come back for another couple days starting July 1st for the results and a medical consult. Again, we were happy they would be joining us for a couple more days. This time they stayed 14 days. After 10 days, I was getting restless, wondering when they were going home. When they left at 8am on July 14th, I was happy to once again have a house to myself. I come home from work at 10pm that evening to find them sitting around in my living room. They then informed me that they cannot go back to the grandparents house, where they had been staying, and that their apartment will not be ready until mid-august.
2007-07-23 14:41:34 · 4 answers · asked by Brenda B 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
They are expecting to stay with us until then. As of July 31, they will have been with us 1 month. They are VERY low income and claim they have nowhere else to go. I have talked to my boyfriend about it and he says that I am being selfish about wanting them out. His mother drinks alot every night, and all the 10 year old does is play video games. Last night, upon returning to work, I found everyone drunk. I was told that even the 11 year old had had a sip of someones alcohol. At this point, what do I do? They cant stay much longer, cause we rent our apartment and after a month, the rent will go up if we continue to have guests, and I KNOW my boyfriends mom doesnt have much money and wont help us that way...
2007-07-23 14:48:44 · update #1
His mom is sleeping on a mattrace in the living room and his little brother is sleeping on the couch... dont know if anyone really cares about this, but i thought i would throw that out there too...
2007-07-23 14:56:05 · update #2
Also, just another note. My boyfriend, roommate and I barely have enough money for OURSELVES to get by, let alone to support others. We are really all just living paycheck to paycheck... I am 20 years old, and my boyfriend and our roommate are both 21. Right now, they are barely paying for themselves, eating our food and spending our money on beer.
2007-07-23 15:03:15 · update #3
First of all, STOP GIVING THEM ANY MONEY AT ALL. Refuse to buy them any beer at all. Tell them your rent will go up bec all of them are there, and they will have to pay the increase bec you 3 can not afford to pay it. Then, cut back on your food budget. Have lots of spaghetti with tomato juice, beans, things that provide nourishment, but are not high cuisine. I agree that you should help family, but the family should not sponge off of you, should help around the house, do cooking & cleaning while you 3 are at work. The good will goes both ways. They can not take advantage of you unless you let them.
2007-07-23 15:47:01 · answer #1 · answered by old beatnik 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well lets see i believe in family and i know that i help others alot and i do more than you and when they needed me in the begining i found after i did help all the way i needed there help and got it .but also being able to help because you care is good too cause i know that if you are a scrooge it can come back and bite you when someone tells you you are a burden too when you are down and it can happen just ask anyone truthful enough.
2007-07-23 14:55:43 · answer #2 · answered by freely me 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You and your bf need to have a talk. Does he feel the same way you do?? If not, it may be hard to sway him.
However, it is equally your place and you deserve to be comfortable in your place.
Have a talk with your boyfriend and tell him that you have been more than courteous allowing them to stay as long as they have, but they can not move in. They need to make other arrangements until their apartment is ready and it was very rude of them to come back uninvited and expect you all to allow them to stay. Be firm, but unwaivering.
2007-07-23 14:48:41 · answer #3 · answered by endo_chic 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yup, its time to sit down and have a talk. Talk it out with your boyfriend first....don't put his mother down but maybe if you tell him your afraid that your relationship with him is suffering, maybe he'll see the light. Then together you can have a talk with his mother.......at least agree on mid-August THIS END!!!! Good luck.
2007-07-23 14:53:27 · answer #4 · answered by joni 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋