Your house plants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.
Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.
You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
You hear your favorite song in an elevator.
You watch the Weather Channel.
Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up" and "break up."
You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.
Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."
You're the one calling the police because those %&@# kids next door
Won't turn down the stereo.
Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.
You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's leftovers.
Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
You take naps from noon to 6 PM
Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one.
Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset,
Rather than settle, your stomach.
If you're a gal, you go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid,
Not condoms and pregnancy tests.
A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good stuff."
You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.
"I just can't drink the way I used to"
Replaces "I'm never going to drink that much again."
90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
You drink at home to save money before going to a bar.
You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that doesn't apply to
You and can't find one to save your sorry old ***.
2007-07-23 13:09:24 · 5 answers · asked by Sangy . 4 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Normally, I look to your contributions for inspiration and hope...now I'm depressed as heck :) Thanks for the reality brick hitting me upside my middle-aged head...
2007-07-24 08:30:31 · answer #1 · answered by 55JD55 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HA! HA! i gues i'll be doing those things some years from now. but right now i party like a rockstar
2007-07-23 13:40:51 · answer #2 · answered by karmenchicago 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's really cool! Who wrote it? Where did you find it? It's really amazing!
2007-07-23 13:25:58 · answer #3 · answered by Tasha 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yea.. is sad. but true..
and u can't deny the truth!
2007-07-23 20:37:02 · answer #4 · answered by Sleepy One 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sad to say, I'M OLD!!!
2007-07-23 14:04:27 · answer #5 · answered by ♥KayKay♥ 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋