I am so heart broken, I went to my in-laws house for dinner and again they were hounding me about their trip to Holiday World /Splashing Safari. I have medical problems, and was told by my OB, that I am not allowed to go. However, they continued to hound me until I felt like they really do not care about me, my baby or my family in general. It is like they only want what they want and to Hades with the plans that my family had already made since WE decided NOT to take a risk of going.Part of it is that we have had trouble trying to have a baby, and after 10 years, God and prayers have finally given us one & she is very precious to us. To my hubby, my son and myself. Why can't they understand this? I explained it to them just as I have done you, and MIL's reply was "Well, you have had almost nine months with this baby, you can all go to Holiday World". Please tell me that I am wrong, that they do care...because right now, I feel like what is more important to us means little to them.
2007-07-23 12:22:23 · 13 answers · asked by Midnight Winter WOLF 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I wish to God in Heaven that he did stand up to them. I just talked to him again about our plans for the day, and he stood there and was about to say something about going with them & I had to cut him off. He was about to say, "Well, I was hoping that we could go and spend time with my brother and sister while they were in town."
I am quite sure that his parents put him up to it, and it does not change my mind at all. My health & that of our unborn child means more to me than their trip. I have waited so long for this baby, they just can't seem to care enough about anything beyond their own blind desires.
2007-07-23 13:01:22 · update #1
tell them NO MEANS NO! a vacation should be fun, not hell like this sounds like! what rude people to not honor your decision.
tell your husband to explain to them this is RUDE and they need to stop.
2007-07-23 12:26:18 · answer #1 · answered by Christina V 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
It really is selfish for the in laws to pressure you like this over a get together after all the things you have been through with your health. If your husband is not going to take up for ;you, you will have to do it yourself. In the bigger picture, I think the in laws are wanting a family reunion, and aren't really convinced that you have a medical problem that keeps you from going on vacation. Maybe you can get your doctor to write a letter explaining why you can not go at this time and you can give it to the in laws. Good Luck and God Bless
2007-07-31 07:44:45 · answer #2 · answered by WVPV07 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Im so sorry that after your miricle, you are placed under this pressure, even by your husband, or so it seems.
If ANYONE should be on the same par as you its your hubby, whos baby is a miricle also, he should be fiercely protecting you and bub, should be his only concern.
The in-laws are being very unreasonable and completely disrespectful to your family and your well being, not to mention THEIR soon to be born grand child!!
If they cared at all, they defininately would not pressure you or be preassuring and playing mind games/favourites with your hubby, which it sounds like they are doing.
Its only natural to take care of baby's best interest, meaning you now. STAND YOUR GROUND, WITH WHOEVER GETS IN THE WAY OF YOUR AND BUBS WELFARE, EVEN HUBBY, CAUSE YOU AND BABY ARE THE MOST IMPORTANT.
Why cant they be happy, and come to you, make plans that are appropriate.
Too much to ask for a little caring from them??
2007-07-31 11:07:05 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just tell them ALL NO, and stick behind your statement. Do not let in laws tell you what to do, let him go ahead and go out with them until he gets sick of them too. Take care of yourself and your unborn child the way you feel you want to. You must be getting near the baby's birth date, or you would not be so upset. I do not blame you, but for heaven's sake, stick up for yourself and do what YOU think is right. The relatives will get over this and and so will your husband and if none of them do, they are not worth all of this anguish you feel.
2007-07-28 13:37:58 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why not compromise. Allow your hubby and son to go and you stay home unless there is a conflict with your delivery date. If your hubby is bringing it up after you made your decision . . . maybe he would like to go. There is nothing wrong with him wanting to spend time with his family so consider the prospect of him going with them a gift.
If the trip does not interfere with your delivery period kiss hubby and tell him he can go so he can spend time with the family and then you can also take some time to relax, catch up with your girlfriends, and pamper yourself and your new addition. You will be known as the generous daughter in law and loving wife.:-) win/win situation.
Take care of yourself and the family. I am sure things will be alright.
2007-07-30 14:33:14 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your husband needs to handle this; these are his parents, after all. Once he's finally stood up to them - and told them to stop hounding you - then you can determine by their actions whether they do love you or not.
They do love you, y'know. The whole situation sounds more like they want you to prove to them that you love them by putting your wishes aside to be with them.
Your husband can handle whatever is needed right now, and then you and he and your baby can continue on with your lives as you wish.
Just continue to love them all!
2007-07-23 19:47:04 · answer #6 · answered by MomBear 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
They have issues. They should care about your health and the well being of their grand child than they do about their trip to Holiday World.
2007-07-23 21:47:19 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
communication is the best course to take. talk to the hubby and talk to him very frank. quite and reserved but tell him and ask him those questions. i dont' know why the relatives are so mean about it but heck, you can tell them aslo if he won't you will be probably hated but heck inlaws since the end of time sometimes are mean and that is why i would talk to hubby and tell him its his turn to speak out to them period.
2007-07-28 12:49:27 · answer #8 · answered by Tsunami 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
They do, but you also are being selfish. Their plans can't all stop because of you. YOU are the one who needs to ensure you don't do anything to endanger your baby, and your husband should be supporting you.
2007-07-24 00:01:05 · answer #9 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you have waited a long time for your miracle,listen to your doctor,and tell your husband to tell his parents to back off,stick to your decision,you and your baby and husband deserve to be healthy and happy,forget about the inlaws,listen to your doctor,and i am so happy for you and your family, stay strong for you and your baby
2007-07-28 07:50:42 · answer #10 · answered by tnsupermomwhit 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋