Dealing with the Aftermath of Road Rage?

Question

I live in a quiet town, and this is the first time I've ever been the victim of road rage. I was followed by a drunk driver who'd been weaving all over the road and almost hit me in my lane as I was trying to get around him. He apparently decided it was my fault somehow that he almost hit me, so he followed me to a parking lot and proceeded to get abusive, but decided to leave when I suggested that we call the police. He roared off before I could get his license number, still yelling at me.

Now I'm sitting here shaking because I'm so angry and I don't know how to deal with these feelings. I don't even want to get back in my car again -- that's just how bad it is.

If you've been a victim of road rage, what did you do to cope with how you felt afterwards?

I pulled off in a very busy parking lot with plenty of people watching what was going on. I know the area, and that's why I chose it after he ran up on the back end of my car.

And you're right -- I probably shouldn't have even said anything to him, just called 911.

Raven, thank you for your kind and comforting words. I enjoy your responses in R&S, too.

The reason my email is disabled is because there are a lot of people who *don't* appreciate my responses to Catholic bashing. :-)

((((Rammie))))

Yes, I've learned a lot from this experience -- calling 911 immediately being the major lesson. And thanks to you and everyone for the good thoughts and prayers. I'm still pretty shaken, but starting to calm down a bit.

Answer 1

Think safety first.
1) don't drive if you're really upset or shaking. Calm yourself first.
2) stay with your car, so you can lock yourself inside if necessary, but get to a safe or supervised place - so the irate person does not circle back and find you still there for a second attack
3) plan to report the incident to the police, even if you don't have the license plate number. If you have a cell phone, call NOW from your location.

Cry if you need to.
Take some deep breaths and be grateful he's gone.
While it's still fresh in your head, write down everything you can recall about the person, the car, the incident, and what was said.
Once you have written it down, put it in the back seat where you aren't looking at it. Writing it down will help to take the intensity and remove it from your mind, and to leave it on the
paper.
Sure, you'll still be churning, but there will be less intensity to your emotions.
Walk around your car a few times if you need to get some energy out, and to calm yourself.

As soon as you can drive safely, get yourself to a safe place, off the road where other people are to calm yourself further.

Keep in mind and try to be glad that it's over, gone, done. That was then and you are safe NOW.

Answer 2

Firstly, you shouldn't have even talked to him!! The first thing you should have done was called 911. There is no way of knowing how far gone a person is, if they are armed in any way, or if they get off on violence. You should always drive to a populated place, where there are witnesses, before you stop the car if you're being followed.

I have had a gun pulled on me in the car next to me on the road, and I know how scary that can be.

Coping afterwards was very hard. It does leave a scar. You feel angry, scared, helpless, violated, and a hundred other feelings. You don't say how long ago this happened...if it was recent, give yourself a chance to talk about your feelings with others, talk to a law officer about what you should have done and what you should do in the future, and, if these feelings go on for more than is reasonable, think about talking to a psychologist or counselor of some kind, so that you can start feeling secure in yourself again.

Answer 3

I'm so sorry that you had to go through that awful experience.....it's a sad commentary on society when road rage has taken to quiet towns......Even the thought "road rage" was never an issue 20 years ago.....and, thank God that this guys was just drunk, you NEVER you know when someone in your situation could have been confronted by someone flying high on meth or something else......and done some physical damage as well as the obvious emotional/psychological issues that you're now having to deal with.......I hope this forum is somehow therapeutic for you, and good luck in the future......You're a strong person, you'll get through this, but take your time sorting out your feelings......Deep Breath................

All my best,

Christopher

Answer 4

You are dealing with overactive adrenelyne. If this episode has left you feeling like you don't want to get back in your car, you have other issues you're dealing with.

Take a few very deep breaths and realize it's done, it's over and you need to get on with life. Don't think that the guy who caused you this grief has even given a second thought about it!
Just for future reference, don't put yourself in a place where you can be assaulted - physically or verbally. A phone call to the police to report a suspected drunk driver would have eliminated this entire event. Now, go get a big stick and get back in that car!

Answer 5

Aaww I'm sorry to hear that. There are some real creeps out there and they are behind the wheel. Being drunk on top of that is worse. I still would call 911 and give vehicle info and where he was last seen driving to. That may make you feel somewhat better.

I'm still hurt over a santa clause looking biker who kept yelling at me because I pulled out in front of him. (didn't see him) I said sorry but he still kept yelling like an idiot.

Just know they are there and karma will catch up sooner or later. Be of good cheer.

Answer 6

I'm so sorry you had to go through this dear.
I've prayed for you and hope that the comforting arms of our Lord will calm your anger and soothe your fears.

I suppose it's no consolation now, but you have learned a lesson to call 911 before stopping for anyone who threatens you. Your life and well being are far more precious to your family (and us).

blessings (((((wolfeblayde))))) :)

Answer 7

sorry to hear about this. I will pray for you that God gives you the strength to recover from the confrontation. I agree you should call the police and give them what info you have. God Bless you and keep you.