Hi there... I'm moving to India to marry someone there. I really love him and he's a great guy. I have some issues of past abuse and my fiance says I "think too much" and that I talk about "deep issues" too often...and I kind of agree with him. I feel weighted down by these things but I don't really know how normal couples behave with each other...what do you all talk about? Is it just everyday stuff all the time? How was your day? What did you do? That kind of thing? I'm always asking him how he feels and is he ok and all that stuff and I know that's silly. Also...I'm moving there to be with him so I tell him often how big a deal that is (he has never been out of the country before) - and I know I don't need to keep repeating this, but I feel like he doesn't understand what a huge cultural change it is and if he did understand then he wouldn't think I'm bad when I struggle with things...see what I mean? I worry too much. Advice? (Please be nice...no need to be mean).
2007-07-23 09:16:45 · 15 answers · asked by Jazmin 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Currey?
2007-07-23 09:20:19 · answer #1 · answered by elurle 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow you got too much happening in your mind. Id say for one take a breather.
Yes im sure itll b a cultural change but u rambling about how it aint easy for you to him aint a smart idea. You have consciously decided to make this move so take the changes as they come. Hopefully your husband will be a great payoff for your move.
And about talking, just like you wud have a conversation with your bestfriend, the same things. Just be casual treat him like a friend , make him a part of your day to day activities and things shud work out.
India or wherever ...couples are couples i dont think the conversations are different
2007-07-23 16:24:50 · answer #2 · answered by ab 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had culture change too when i moved from the west to India... But you will like it here. It will be like a sort of little adventure for you.
As far as your "thinking too much" is concern, i don't think you should hide anything from your fiancee. Just walk up to him and tell, " since we are accepting each other as life partners, it is of utmost importance that we understand each other and listen to each other." then tell him everything at one go, Ur worries, Ur hopes, Ur expectations, Ur dreams.... and most important Ur problems and say to him, " i want you to really help me with my problems because i know you can understand me the best. that's y i decided to get married to you". After this session, i m sure he will ALWAYS listen to you.
2007-07-24 00:19:04 · answer #3 · answered by goddess_of_fame 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi Jazmin and Miss M,
If you can't talk about negitive issues to your husbands or fiance, what kind of relationship are u hoping for... I think you both need to talk to your guys and tell them that you need to share the worst and the great with them otherwise its not health to u. And if you are not well, how will you take care of things??
Deep issues about life are the most meaningful and spiriutal matters that need to be shared for a fulling life.
2007-07-23 19:43:32 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Married couples India talk more about planning the future.
2007-07-23 21:15:00 · answer #5 · answered by guy_next_door_99 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My fiance is Indian and he feels that I think too much also. He is a really good man and I have realized that I have to keep my conversation positive with him. Anything negative, I just keep to myself.
2007-07-23 16:22:48 · answer #6 · answered by Miss M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont overburden yourself, just thank god that atlst its a happily ever after....
be possitive, speak ur mind if u find some problem, speak sweet nothings, plan future together, share fantacies, act innocent n ask stupid questions, make him feel like the dominant male n he will return loads of love, but subtly hold the rod in your hand.
have fun
2007-07-23 16:29:15 · answer #7 · answered by $rEeJ@t@ 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i've noticed indian people are really obsessed with those indian dramas. you should also get your tastebuds read for some hotsauce, indian restaurant food is either really spicy or really sweet.
u must also like rice, rice is good. lol to be honest, i think it will be a big change but you should embrace it. it will be an adventure.
2007-07-23 23:20:23 · answer #8 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you live in the west, stay there and seek professional help. You'll get no such help of any kind in India.
2007-07-23 18:42:02 · answer #9 · answered by rm90046 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be human and down to earth, things would automatically be pleasent and enjoyable. Its India ..................baby
2007-07-24 04:45:37 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋