I have been with this guy for 8years i have cheated on him once and that was a big mistake. He don't trust me and its been 4years ago, we do have two kids together. We are always arguing. Alot of it is the kids we argue about. He is rough with them and i try to stand up for them. He was raised being yelled at all the time. He says i let my daughter run over me. I do love him but sometimes i feel like its not there for us. I am not really in love with him and i feel like im just here.
He really loves me alot. He don't want us to divorce. I try to work things out, but i get tired of us arguing all the time and want to be happy. Should i stay around or leave and be happy.
I don't want my kids to have to see us argue all the time.
2007-07-23 08:09:45 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
you said he was raised being yelled at all the time.is that what you want your kids to grow up like?if you dont break the "chain",it will only continue.having children doesnt keep anyone together!no matter how many you have,if it doesnt work out then it just doesnt.there is a line you have to draw when it comes to your kids "running "over you.if you dont love him,the best thing you can do for yourself is move on.sounds like you are living in misery because he doesnt want a divorce.a marrieage requires both to love one another.trust is another major thing in marriage.if you all dont have trust for one another........you have nothing.dont stay because he wants you to or because of your kids.i did the same thing with my ex for 12 years(stayed with him).i was so miserable the WHOLE time because i knew in my heart that i didnt love him.it also isnt healthy for the kids to hear you two arguing.what ever the reason may be,it will affect them in the long run.that should be the main reason for whatever decision you make.if you stay now because of your kids,you may regret it later for they will eventually grow up and leave you.they may also blame you for staying in such an unhealthy relationship,when thiers seems to go wrong.that is what they see and hear now ,so thats what they may very well be like as adults.good luck and be smart about the choices you make.
2007-07-23 08:24:55 · answer #1 · answered by fishin for answer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you need counseling. Please for the sake of the children, don't let him man handle them. That is your resposibility as an adult. Do NOT let that bully intimidate you. Your children will certainly have issues if you don'tstand up for them. So stand strong.I think you and your husband need to agree on rules for parenting, then stick to them, and support each other. Cheating is never the answer. If you can talk things out like civilized adults,then it is possible to be happy and stay married.
2007-07-23 15:34:21 · answer #2 · answered by onebusy_b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when i was younger i used to think marriage was the one thing that was sacred, but now i realize it's not as i thought. if you look around you'll see people divorcing like crazy. hell nelson mandela got divorced. he did what 20 yrs in prison gets released and decides he can't handle marriage?! i don 't know. it basically comes down to do you want to live unhappy forever? you could be unhappy for a couple of months to a yr if you moved on.
2007-07-23 15:30:05 · answer #3 · answered by fubar_09074 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
File for Divorce if u 2 are always arguing. My mom and dad did they have been divorced for 8 years.
2007-07-23 15:14:31 · answer #4 · answered by tylerpaas 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No, I don't think your marriage is over. It sounds like you have some issues to work on though. Divorce will not solve all your problems, you will just be trading one set of problems for another. Go for counseling, if you go to church, start with your pastor.
2007-07-23 15:14:59 · answer #5 · answered by Dee 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
uh yeah mentally emotionally it's over. look at it this way, you are representing how a relationship is supposed to be to your kids. they are going to model their decisions after yours. if they see you fighting all the time it is not a positive healthy environment. perhaps your husband has a point and perhaps you are to relaxed with the kids, work on it. but do what is best for the kids and yourself.
2007-07-23 15:17:41 · answer #6 · answered by Roxanne G 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
RUN.
Here's why: You cheated on him. You violated his trust and expect him to trust you? He is rough with your kids. You can't trust him either!
You said, "I am not really in love with him..." well...? and you wrote, "Should i stay around or leave and be happy?" You want to leave. You wanted to leave 4 years ago. And you're right, the kids don't need to be exposed to that garbage.
2007-07-23 15:20:37 · answer #7 · answered by getagrip 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Consider the discipline issue, he might be right. Its sounds like the marriage is kaput, but that is your call.
2007-07-23 15:13:09 · answer #8 · answered by Steve C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there is no way we can tell why dont you to start a parenting class or somthing that is what my parents are doing and its working!!And if it is over maybe it was for the best!!!
2007-07-23 15:14:25 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
try counseling. it does seem as though you arent happy......dont be in it just to be in it. you need to be happy.
2007-07-23 15:15:30 · answer #10 · answered by BTB 10/04/08 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋