My sister-in-law is under the impression that she is the same sizes as me (which she very much is not) She often borrows my clothes, and when I get them back they are very stretched out or even missing buttons! How can I handle this without hurting her feelings?
2007-07-23 06:12:41 · 27 answers · asked by Kini 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Give her clothing as gifts for her birthday, Christmas, etc. She must be having a difficult time buying her own. Take her out shopping and casually step into the clothing stores to look around at the new styles. Maybe she needs your help in picking out something that looks good on her. She might like your taste in styles and needs your advice. After a while, she will be able to shop for herself and won't need to borrow your stuff.
2007-07-23 06:24:50 · answer #1 · answered by Troasa 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your sister-in-law that you are uncomfortable with people borrowing your clothes, especially without your knowledge/permission. Gently point out to her that some of the clothes have come back damaged (missing buttons), and therefore you can't allow her to borrow your things if she can't be careful with them.
Don't make it a question of her weight - focus more on the delicacy of your clothing and her need to be careful. Offer to go shopping with her so she can buy her own sweater/skirt/shirt/etc instead of borrowing yours.
2007-07-23 06:19:20 · answer #2 · answered by teresathegreat 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, Im glad you dont want to hurt her feelings especially in this agrivateting situation. Obiously you cant call her fat because that would hurt her feelings, so you need to stop lending her clothing that you wish to wear again. From now on, only lend her cloths she can keep or you dont mind having ruined. If you want a white lie to use, tell her that you had lent some clothing to a friend and it all came back damaged so you are not lending it out to anyone anymore because you are now short on clothes. Good luck hun, its hard to keep the peace some times but these are your personal belongings and its ok to be greedy with them.
2007-07-23 06:25:10 · answer #3 · answered by shadowsthathunt 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just let her borrow the clothes that she has already worn in the past, that way she can't ruin any more of them.
Have a quiet word with your brother and see if he can say anything to her for you.
Alternatively go shopping with her and advise her on what clothes look best on her, that way she will see what suits her better, and she may not need to borrow off you in the future.
Result :o
2007-07-23 06:18:36 · answer #4 · answered by dangel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would let her know that when she returns the clothes they are not in the same shape as when you let her borrow them, therefore she can no longer borrow your clothes. Returning someone's clothes with buttons missing is just rude!
2007-07-23 06:23:18 · answer #5 · answered by frawlicious 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The next time she borrows something and it comes back damaged, point it out and ask her to be more careful. Be nice about it, and don't attribute it to her size. After this happens a couple of times, she will stop borrowing things.
2007-07-23 06:19:35 · answer #6 · answered by Wundt 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are probably going to hurt her feelings, but you have to simply tell her that you are not going to loan your clothes out to anyone. Just tell her you need all of your clothes to wear your self. Any reasonable person should understand that and she most of all since she has to borrow yours. If that fails, then tell her the truth. I would try the first suggestion first as she surely would relate to that..good luck !
2007-07-23 06:30:30 · answer #7 · answered by angel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't worry about that at a time like this, though it may be your instinct for someone you care about. Give it to her straight, there is no other way, don't be unnecessarily callous, but be frank! It's up to her to be able to accept the reality of her current situation, and that has little to do with you aside from the fact that it is impacting your personal belongings. Be supportive if she wants to help improve her physical fitness, but be clear about where you stand on the subject of her borrowing your things.
2007-07-23 06:20:14 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lose even more weight or buy smaller clothes so that she can't even fit in them in the first place. I admire your sister in law for not minding that she's not a stick figure. I hope she finally gets enough money to buy her own hot clothes.
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2016-10-09 07:05:19 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋