I had just come out of a 5 year relationship, and a few months later i meet the woman i had been looking for, we had some much in comman. She has 2 great kids. I proposed 2 her after knowin her for 10 days! She spent every week driving to c me. The problem is that I belive that I have OCD which makes me lie, even abt small unimportant things, like did i but the rubbish out etc. She was goin to move in with me, until she found out that i had OCD and has now returned to scotland and found the church. I had moved up to scotland to be near her and thought this was a fresh start with her, and the offer of a second chance, but now she says that she has moved on in her life.
I know that there is not much room to say everything that has happened over the last few months between us, so i would like any views on what i should do.
I am now trying to get treatment 4 what ever problem i seem to have.
Many thanks all
2007-07-23 05:11:42 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
She hasnt giving up on me as a friend, just as a couple, which is hurting me more, because i love her so much. I do belive inside that she does love me.
2007-07-23 05:19:34 · update #1
She alos has the children to think abt, and how they are feeling abt everything that has happened. She has forgiven me ans has helped me so much in trying to get help for my OCD
2007-07-23 05:21:13 · update #2
Over the last 3 weeks while i have been up in scotland it has been a mix of good times and a mix of bad times. So she and her children have seen a bit of the good side of me. She did tell me that she loved me, and then she said that we could only be friends. I had a job up in scotland, all be it not very gud job and i had interviews for other jobs last week, and she told me that she had a business idea that if i didnt get either of the jobs she would want me to help her run it with her, then later in the week she said that she had a vision from god abt how her life was goin to be and that she was goin to start her own charity to help people who have been placed in emergency housing and had nothing, but she didnt say that i cud be involved in that in anyway. we said that we wud go on holiday as mates with her kids & then after talkin to her pastor told me that it wud not b right in gods eyes or in the boblical sence 2 go, we were not goin to be sharing a tent or a sleeping bag...
2007-07-23 05:44:59 · update #3
1 of the things that she asked me to do was to join the church group with her as she belives that god could help me with my OCD, and that by living by gods rules and laws would make me a good person again. So my question is, is god as god or better than therapy for my OCD
2007-07-23 08:30:33 · update #4
Having just read a few items on the net, would a long distance relationship be the answer?
2007-07-23 09:13:08 · update #5
Watch "As Good As It Gets" starring Helen Hunt and Jack Nicholson. It's about a man who has Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, but the woman loved him in spite of that. And because of her love for him, he changed. I think you can somehow relate to it, except if that woman you're talking about really did care for you, she would love and accept you for who you are. That lady will die not knowing the better side of you, and someday you'll find the person who would love you unconditionally. It's good that you're getting treatment for OCD. I wish you well.
2007-07-23 05:24:55 · answer #1 · answered by Yuki 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It is difficult to turn off a switch which says "lover" - to "friend" That is why it hurts so much to make an impossible switch from passionate love you may feel to a more casual, not romantic affection as friendship is.
I do not think she is doing you a favour by allowing you to remain a friend, knowing you still love her so much.
It is not that she is trying to hurt you. It is that she probably does not know how to best help you.
Therefore if I were you, I'd move on, myself and do some licking of your own wounds for a while, until you are more balanced-minded within this conundrum.
2007-07-23 05:30:52 · answer #2 · answered by skydancerwi 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not quite sure were to go with this one, if she loves you the condition you have should not effect her feelings to you, she may be concerned for her children but then if you are good with the kids and your condition does not effect them then i don't understand her reasoning. does she know you are getting help and is she supportive? if you love her sit her down air your concerns and the way you feel and see how things go. good luck and i hope this has been some help.
2007-07-23 05:38:47 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would move on remember she's got 2 children and she saw you as a prop//i would say there's nothing there that sounds genuine//whatsmore thousands of people suffer OCD whats so wrong in that it doesn't make you a bad person and it doesn't make you lie
2007-07-23 05:37:17 · answer #4 · answered by srracvuee 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should move on. Forget about her. She obviously doesn't feel the same way and has moved on with her life. I'm sorry you should find someone who loves you even with your problem.
2007-07-23 05:24:04 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
to be honest this woman does not care for you if she found out you had ocd and now your not to allowed to move in forget her she just selfish
2007-07-23 05:16:32 · answer #6 · answered by palmtreesareheaven 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
forget her you both have to much baggage wait for a year and then think about starting a relationship ok
2007-07-23 06:30:40 · answer #7 · answered by Matt 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋