A woman was walking down the street when she was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless woman who asked her for a couple of dollars for dinner. The woman took out her billfold, extracted ten dollars and asked, “If I give you this money, will you buy some chocolate with it instead of dinner?” “No,” I had to stop chocolate years ago, the homeless woman replied.
Will you use it to go shopping instead of buying food?” the woman asked. “No,” I don’t waste time shopping, the homeless woman said. “I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive.”
Will you spend this on a beauty salon instead of food?” the woman asked.
“Are you NUTS!” replied the homeless woman. “I haven’t had my hair done in 20 years!”
“Well,” said the woman, “I’m not going to give you the money. Instead, I’m going to take you out for dinner with my hubby and myself tonight.”
The homeless woman was astounded. “Won’t your hubby be furious with you for doing that? I know I’m dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting.”
The woman replied, “That’s okay. It’s important for him to see what a woman looks like after she has given up shopping, hair appointments, And chocolate.”
2007-07-23 04:05:58 · 15 answers · asked by "!" 5 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
That's nice. Star for you! That's a nice one all you guys must read!
This one's for the ladies!
One morning, a rich guy meets a bum, covered in rags on the road, asking for a few pennies. He asks the bum if he played golf. He says "Never played it!" Then the rich guy asks if he drank. The bum replied, "No, I gave that up a few years ago." The rich guy invites him to his house, offering the bum a day's food. Obviously, the bum declines saying, "But I stink, I'm in rags and I look pretty dirty too." The rich guy says, "It's OK, I just want my wife to see what a man becomes if he doesn't play golf, or drink!"
^_^
2007-07-23 04:27:51 · answer #1 · answered by Akilesh - Internet Undertaker 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
A shape worker walks exact right into a bar. he's a splash great, menacing guy. He orders a lager, chugs it lower back, and bellows, "All you adult adult males throughout the time of this component of the bar are a set of idiots!" a dazzling silence descends. After a 2nd he asks "all human beings have been given a topic remember with that?" The silence lengthens. He then chugs lower back yet yet another beer and growls, "And all you adult adult males at diverse component of the bar are all scum!" as with out postpone as decrease lower back, the bar is silent. He seems around belligerently and roars, "all human beings have been given a topic remember with that?" A lone guy gets up from his stool unsteadily and starts off to stroll in direction of the guy. "you obtain a topic remember, chum?" "Oh no; i'm merely on the incorrect component of the bar."
2016-10-22 10:22:17 · answer #2 · answered by balok 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Star!
2007-07-23 04:09:27 · answer #3 · answered by police 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wity, still chuckling.
ps still trying to find out what the Fire brigade was doing with a step ladder next door? will let you know!
2007-07-23 05:52:40 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nice one. Will print this one for work's notice board
2007-07-23 06:16:02 · answer #5 · answered by brenguns1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
great joke! i'll have to remember that on! still laughing! sent it to my hubby! may he won't gripe the next time i have my hair done! lol
2007-07-23 04:41:02 · answer #6 · answered by sunshinembf 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ha ha yeah that is a funny one...I'll have to remember that one :o)
2007-07-23 04:14:31 · answer #7 · answered by Lou 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ha ha ha
2007-07-23 04:08:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
cool
2007-07-23 04:08:56 · answer #9 · answered by dream theatre 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give her steak!
2007-07-23 04:10:17 · answer #10 · answered by ya-who 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋