Is it wrong for a 38yr old man & 16yrd old girl ?

Question

To have a loving realashonship ? your opions please !

Answer 1

Compromise! Open communication and complete understanding. Put up a daily schedule, who is doing what and for how long? Then switch!

Answer 2

In the UK 16 is actually the legal age of consent for sex. Because we change so much from the age of 16 until 20 it would be a better idea to wait until the girl was a little older at least.
The older we get, the less an age difference seems to matter.

I have known girls of 16 that looked a lot older than their age......but at the end of the day they were still a 16 yr old child underneath it all. Unless she's very mature in her outlook, I think you'd see quite a few differences between you both & maybe realise she's way too young.

As to the right or wrong of starting a long term relationship with a girl so much younger than 38, legally it isn't breaking any laws within the UK, but morally you'd be given a name of paedophile, which once applied - would be very hard to get rid of.

Answer 3

Legally it's not wrong. Morally though it might be a little bit eh? Think about your life, think back to when you were 16...what did you know then? What do you know now? Hasn't life changed a LOT? She has a lot of growing up to do, a lot of changes will take place in her over the next 10-15yrs before she truly knows who she is. Why don't you wait for her to grow up a little? She might be looking to you to 'father' her, protect her and wrap her up in comfort and love. Your needs might differ...a man your age with a 16yr old girl has a 'trophy' and your friends might envy you, this makes you feel like a King. But it's not a reason to get involved with her is it?

Tread lightly on her little heart my friend, she is a child fighting to be an adult, don't posess her or smother her, let her be free yet always be there for her, don't snatch at her and oppress her, if you truly love her (you don't use this word here), you'll wait until she's matured a little. She was recently only 15 for goodness sake!

Be her mentor, her guiding light and support (in a non sexual manner) and you'll earn her respect & trust, this is all you should expect from her right now!

Answer 4

Well I think generally people will think it is wrong, purely because of the age gap. Most people will think that when this 38 year old was 28, the girl was only 6 years old which immediately labels this 38 year old man as a paedophile.

However, the girl is 16 years of age which is the legal age to have sex, so it is possible for these two people to be in a loving relationship. But they cannot expect it not to be frowned upon, especially to the guy. People will end up calling him a cradle snatcher and think that he manipulated this girl.

It's a tough question and situation. Overall the main consensus is that it's wrong. However who are we to judge love when it is true and pure?

Answer 5

I think this couple should wait until she is legal and can make decisions on her own.

Also the man is old enough to be her father; what will someone who has had 22 more years of experience find in common with a child?

I think the girl needs to date boys of her own age and wait until she gets a bit older before she can consider herself in love. Right now she is just at that "infatuation" or crush stage of her life.

Also a 38yr old who wants to date somebody so young just shows that he has not yet grown up in his mind and still views himself as a child.

Answer 6

YES!! the 38 yr old can go to jail if you do anything more than kissing. Does he really want to risk that? He's like old enough to be her dad! Alot of people will look at him in a bad way and look at him as a "perv".Why is he liking a 16 yr old and not a girl his age, anyway? But then again, there are couples where one is like 48 and the other is 25 or something. If you REALLY want to, wait until she's older.

Answer 7

We're talking 22 years here. I have a good friend who is now 77 and is married to a woman 22 years younger...but she was 30 when they got married.It's not the age difference as much as it is her age right now. She has some milestones to hit that you passed long ago. She can't vote, she can't legally drink, she can't sign a contract...and in some states, she can't legally consent to sex with you. There are probably some significant life experiences she lacks that you take for granted. If you tie up her life now, she will be deprived of some learning opportunities that she deserves. Like dating many guys, having multiple experiences, educational opportunities, and so on. Is she going to get pregnant? At what age? Is she going to finish school? Are you in communication with her parents? Are they your age? Many handicaps here, not many positives. I'd think long and hard before pushing the girl's buttons.

Answer 8

My problem is with the huge age difference. What things could a 38 year old male and a 16 year old female possibly have in common, except for the sex drive? This seems to go against the cultural norm here in the U.S. However, the laws of several states allow 16 year olds to marry with parental consent.

Answer 9

I'm not going to say that it is particularly wrong for the 16 year old girl, because she is still so young and an older guy can be a manipulating factor in her life. But it is definitely wrong, inappropriate, and sick for the 38 year old man to be thinking about, let alone be in a relationship, with a 16 year old girl.

Answer 10

Legally maybe it is wrong!
I personally think it is normal as long as the relationship is not FORCED upon the 16 year old.
But you can be sure it will not last too long ... after a while when the sexual attraction diminishes you will realize that your mental incompatbility will become painfully obvious. So enjoy the moment and do not try to make it PERMANENT

Answer 11

the 16 year old girl is a child lets face it, at that age she really does not know what she wants,
and would it work,
10 years from now she is 26 and full of life and he is 48 and looking the part.

the olderman needs to grow up he as a brain and should use it.
girls that young offden get crushes on older men it is up to that older man to act like a adult, forcrying out loud he could be her father he is old enough

regards x kitti x