...ago and for a very good reason: I saw my mom die of emphisema. Now I dislike it a lot. My husband smokes but from the very beginning I told him I didn't like him to smoke in the car because it's a close space. He doesn't do it and he's very careful where he smokes.
But, when we go visit his family and we go places in my brother-in-law's car, the first thing my B-I-L does after he gets in the car, is light a cigarette. The problem is, that he does it with all the windows closed because either the air conditioning or the heating is on. He's in the front with his wife in the passenger's seat and my husband and I sit in the back and all the smoke seems to get on our faces. I just can't stand it, I start coughing and I really need to open the window in order to breathe. Something not nice when it's 20 degrees below zero in Michigan.
He's a very nice guy and I don't want to offend him. Any ideas how I can tell him to stop smoking in the car? I think it's not healthy for anybody.
2007-07-22 17:14:22 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
edhelosa: What has it got to do with 'Christian beliefs'?.
You're right: HIS rights end where MINE begin.
He can smoke in his house all he wants.. it's his lungs, not mine.
2007-07-22 17:43:17 · update #1
Just tell him nicely the way you did here. My daughter in law
does not smoke either.....the smoke makes her eyes get red and watery, and she too starts coughing. She is allergy to
the smoke.
I truly believe he will stop smoking in the car knowing what it
does to you. If its a long drive, he can take a smoke break at
some place he can stop for a few minutes.
If he has to smoke, then you and your husband take your car and follow them.
2007-07-22 17:21:20 · answer #1 · answered by Eve 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I am a smoker. I NEVER smoke around non-smokers. I smoke alone in my car. If I am going to pick up someone else, I open the windows long before I pick them up and do not smoke. I also spray air freshener in the car.
If I can do this in my own car when I am only picking up people to give them rides (not going somewhere with a friend) he certainly can do it for you.
If I understood your question, you and your husband are visiting his family and do not have your own car with you.
Next time, ask him ahead of time if he can refrain from smoking as it bothers you. Let him know he has the right to say no, but that you will then have to make other arrangements to get where you are going. If he is a great guy, he will understand and refrain from smoking.
2007-07-23 04:02:39 · answer #2 · answered by Patti C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Before you even get in the car tell him you have become very sensitive to smoking and can not be around it. If he will not agree not to smoke in the car take your own. Your health is worth the extra trouble. Take care of yourself and stand up for what you need (breathing is a need). You can try to be nice as you discuss this, but do not continue to live with the smoke, it can cause you to have health problems!
2007-07-23 00:30:28 · answer #3 · answered by shepherd 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Maybe ask your husband if he could talk to his brother about it.... just maybe say that last time in the car you felt really sick afterwards from the smoke and if it wouldn't be too much trouble you'd both appreciate it if he waited until you got to your destination, or at least cracked the windows a bit..?
2007-07-23 06:27:11 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As an off again on again smoker I think it's pretty rude to smoke in a car with non smokers. Just tell him you are struggling with the smoke and Im sure he will understand
2007-07-23 00:18:55 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hopefully he lights up because he doesn't realize it bothers you and not because he doesn't care. Just ask nicely that he not smoke until you get where your going. If he smokes anyway, you may have to limit your outings with him or take your car where smoking isn't allowed.
2007-07-23 10:05:53 · answer #6 · answered by Classy Granny 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it is your car just tell him, I don't permit smoking in my car.
If it is his car, You can politely ask him to wait until you arrive at your destination, but remember it's his house, so it's his rules.
For some people it is just habit.
I quit 2 years ago, but I remember lighting a cigarette every time I got behind the wheel, even if I had just finished one.
2007-07-23 00:26:44 · answer #7 · answered by therustedknight 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm a smoker, and wouldn't consider smoking in a car with other people who are non-smokers. I'd just politely ask him not to light up, or else you and your husband should choose to use your own car when you go on a trip.
2007-07-23 00:23:23 · answer #8 · answered by Jolly 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Just be up front with him and tell him that you can't handle breathing the smoke. If he is as nice as you say, he will not be offended by it at all.
2007-07-23 00:23:31 · answer #9 · answered by Christopher R 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just tell him that it really affects you, and you get sick, and ask him to stop smoking in the car when you're in it. If he's nice he'll understand and not take offence, if he won't, maybe you could take your own car.
2007-07-23 00:17:53 · answer #10 · answered by ♥♥Mum to Superkids Baby on board♥♥ 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋