I'm 18 and my girlfriend is 17. I am a virgin and i told her so when she asked. Then she quickly said is also a virgin. I thought that she wasn't because she was in a relationship for a year and a half and her ex would brag about having sex with her, but i have my doubts about him because he seems like the kind of guy who would lie abot that to look cool. But then today someone who knows my girlfriend but is not good friends with her but used to be good friends with my girlfriend's ex said she was pretty sure my girlfriend was not a virgin.
Now, i trust her because she has never lied to me about anything but there is a seed of doubt. How do i bring this up with her to ease my mind?
2007-07-22 17:04:14 · 25 answers · asked by Tristan R 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I honestly don't care if she is a virgin or not. I was actually surprised when she said she was. I just assumed that she wasn't because she was with the guy for such a long time. It would just bother me that she had lied and maybe moreso the reason she lied.
2007-07-22 17:40:58 · update #1
Why would you worry about it? If you really like her it shouldn't matter to you what she did in the past. It is what she is doing right now that should count.
2007-07-22 17:29:46 · answer #1 · answered by § dreamer § 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, this girl could've had a bad break up with the old boyfriend, and he could possibly be spreading some bad rumors about your girlfriend because she has moved on, with someone better, and he is now jealous, and is trying to hurt her, as well as you.
If you completely trust this girl with your entire heart, tell her how you feel, if she in turn trusts, and respects you, she will understand your feelings, and be truthful with you. You need to stress TRUTH to her, because losing your virginity is a pretty big thing, and it needs to be respected by yourself as well as your partner. If she doesn't want to talk about it, or is standoffish, then I would assume she is lying. Just trust your heart, and if you have any doubts, call her on them. I wish you all the best!
2007-07-22 17:12:28 · answer #2 · answered by momof3anglz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only people who know they are truly virgins are themselves and their partners. Many people can talk and say things, but the only ones who know are those who were behind closed doors. I dont think anyone would lie about it, and people should not be intimate until marriage anyway. Trust is a huge part of a relationship, honesty is so valuable.. I would ask her, tell her I am not judging her and will love her either way, you just want the truth.
2007-07-22 17:09:57 · answer #3 · answered by EM-water2 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You either trust her or you don't. If you ask her about it again, she's going to assume you think she lied to you. Unless she was ever pregnant or had an STD, there's no way for you to know for sure.
So how about this: if you find her to be honest with you in other ways, give her the benefit of the doubt on this. And congrats on the decision be a virgin -- you'll save yourself a lot of heartache and stress if you wait until marriage.
2007-07-22 17:09:14 · answer #4 · answered by Dena 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well let me give you some insight on us females tristan. Sometimes chicks lie to look better and have more respect given to them by guys, expecially if they like them...If she really loves you she shouldn't lie to you even if it puts your relationship in jeopordy..lying is worse then the truth in my opinion. Im not a virgin and i wont tell a guy i am either to get him to like me.... and as for the fact that she was with her ex for a year and a half... shes not a virgin... shes not a slutt but shes not a virgin..belive me...you should just ask her about it and tell her to tell you the truth and if you do, tell her you love her and you wont leave her if shes not a virgin.. Good luck mateyy
2007-07-22 17:10:09 · answer #5 · answered by Nikki <3 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im 17 and my boyfriend is 18.. so we have something in common. ask her straight out. Have you had sex with (whatever his name is) and tell her you want her to trust you and whatever she tells you your not goin to tell anyone. make her reassured that you dont mind if she has lost her virginity. a year and a half is a long time, maybe she is scared that you wont respect her if she has had sex. good luck. Tellin the truth is hard when your afraid of what the outcome might be.. :)
2007-07-22 17:11:16 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think you do care. If you didn't why did you even bother to ask?
Girls nowadays are so naive and thinking that guys would still love them as much even if they had N relationships in the past, but as guys we know thats bullshit!!
If you are not thinking of marrying her then just forget about it. Mostly likely she is not going tell you the truth anyway. Just enjoy your times together and don't worry too much about it.
2007-07-23 23:28:12 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just ask her straight out! Tell her the situation, and no matter the outcome you won't be upset! If she isn't a virgin then she probably told you that she was to make herself seem more "pure" for you! Good luck!
2007-07-22 17:08:53 · answer #8 · answered by lindsay_aftan8 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does it matter? ...and how important is it to you that she is a virgin?
Also, remember, guys think of oral sex as sex, and girls generally don't...
...but if it really is important, then you need to ask her and tell her how important it is to you, AND how important it is to you that she tell you the truth. She may be afraid because she doesn't want to lose you...but if you really need the truth, then let her know the circumstances in which you found out....but do it in a private place, and don't try to embarrass her.
2007-07-22 17:10:50 · answer #9 · answered by hunnygril 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
say something about sex or bein a virgin.or just straight up ask her,and make her look in2 your eyes.tell her you want honesty,and that its okay if she's not.i dont think you shoukd listen to anybody but her.someone that isnt good friends with ur girl may say sumthin just to twist yall relationship around.and her ex probably jus wanna look coo
2007-07-22 17:08:22 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋