My two younger brothers ( 15 &17) came home hungry from the gym and asked my sister and I if we cooked anything. We said we hadn't gotten around to it but maybe tonight can be pizza night since we didn't really feel like cooking anyway.
They went and asked our dad for the money and (my dad is a very old fashioned guy) he came out, gave them money and said " That's just for the boys, the girls should cook".
Now, we usually cook ( my sister, mom and I) so it's not a big deal but for some reason, it really upset us tonight. I mean, are we like the maids or something?
We were raving mad and decided to go out by ourselves.
Are we overacting.
2007-07-22 14:38:17 · 31 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
No. I don't think so. I think what your Dad did was wrong. 15 & 17 year-old soon-to-be men should know how to cook. How old were you when you started? See what I mean? No disrespect, but your dad is not living in the old days, He should teach his sons to stand on their own two-feet and not to depend on a woman for anything. He should also show them how to respect women, since there are a few in his family. Nowadays, if you're a man living in this life (especially in America), you best know how to do all the household duties a woman can..OR you'll be eating fast-food for a LONG-PERIOD of time in your life!
I know many spolied boys-2-men and they are still living with mama (or dad)(21-45) I guess they have not cut the umbillical cord yet!
2007-07-22 14:46:21 · answer #1 · answered by Lovely 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely not! I think your father is wrong unless there is an agreed rule stating the fact that you should cook for your brothers or have the dinner ready and if not only the boys can have money for take out. That's cold. I can surely understand you and your sister being upset and hurt. I think you and your sister should respectfully share your feelings with your father and your brothers because their attitude exhibits an attitude that says theirs a difference between women and men. Now on the other hand IF you and your sister failed to obey your parents by not using your time wisely and therefore not having the meal ready for the family...due to the fact that you may be living at home rent-free, then yes, you may just be receiving what has been warned about and understood may happen. Is the latter the case?
2007-07-22 15:14:58 · answer #2 · answered by MeHurdu 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not overreacting. Anyone would feel that way. You girls deserve a break too.
Personally I'm not the type to cook. I don't like it and don't really know much about it. Recently I got into a relationship and he expects (or expected) me to cook for him all the time. He was under the impression that women have to do the cooking and that's that. He must have been raised the same way your brothers are being raised. Well, let me tell you something, he learned quickly. You should tell your father he's being unfair. If your brothers keep being raised thinking that women have to take care of them all the time then they'll be up for a rude awakening when they go out into the real world.
2007-07-22 14:49:12 · answer #3 · answered by ALT 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, you're certainly not over reacting. As you indicated, your household is based on "traditional" standards. One's definition of "traditional" is subjective, I suppose. However, based on the information you shared, it sounds a bit archaic, selfish and chauvinistic.
Perhaps to get the ladies of the house a bit more appreciation, flexibility and assistance, try discussing the matter with the entire family. Explain how it makes you feel when you have other commitments (as do your brothers, ie. homework, sports, etc.), yet still take the time to cook dinner for the family. Help them understand that you enjoy preparing meals, it would be helpful (and appreciated) if your brothers perhaps cleaned the dishes, or some other division of labor.
Your brothers will need to cook, clean, etc., for themselves when they are on their own, so why not learn the skills at home, in a loving environment instead of learning where folks may not care to teach them? Also, it will assist them in understanding that not all women will "take care of them"....they'll learn an appreciation and respect for the things you, your sister and mom do for them.
2007-07-22 14:49:27 · answer #4 · answered by HappyOne 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely not! Good for you for going out by yourselves, I hope you thoroughly enjoyed yourselves. It's completely archaic that your father would make a statement like that. This is 2007, where has he been living, in a cave?!
By the way, in our household, my husband does virtually all the cooking because he's the better cook. I do other stuff that he doesn't like doing. In my opinion, that's how it should be, sharing the housework. Why should women do all the work, just because we have a uterus? Sheesh!
2007-07-22 14:46:30 · answer #5 · answered by . 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What a bad example your Dad is to the boys. He is teaching them all of wrong ways of treating a woman. No wonder there are problems with marriage today. That man best wake up and smell the coffee. I can tell you that if that were my husband, he would be out the door.
2007-07-22 14:51:36 · answer #6 · answered by UPESKYMO 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, you're not over reacting. So the boys get dinner bought for them because they can't cook, but you girls can cook & get nothing. What if one nite you just made dinner for you "girls" & said too bad, you guys can't cook so you don't get anything. If anything, I think you should have been the ones who were treated for doing all the cooking for everyone else. I don't blame you for going out by yourselves, who needed that?!
2007-07-22 14:45:00 · answer #7 · answered by Sue C 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't ever think that anyone could overreact to such a sexist statement, even if it was made by your dad. I think from now on, you should just cook for the women and leave your dad to his own devices. He'll probably blow up over that, but stand firm until he treats you all equally!
2007-07-22 14:43:04 · answer #8 · answered by HoPeFuL 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you are not over reacting. Next time, fix yourselves something that smells really great, like french toast & bacon. And if dad comes in and asks for some, say, "No, we just cooked for ourselves. Eat the boys' pizza." He should get the message.
2007-07-22 14:44:26 · answer #9 · answered by old beatnik 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If right this moment is your birthday. chuffed BIRTHDAY:) . many all people is so egocentric.... its very unhappy.... so sorry in the experience that your loved ones are so chilly..... yet you how you won't be able to be. yet don't be unhappy. sometime you will discover somebody and that man or woman will love you and could rejoice your start day. That became me. My husband is the only man or woman in my life to tell me chuffed birthday and rejoice. the following day would be a sparkling day.
2016-10-09 06:21:15 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋