2 are 9 and one is 6. They constantly tell my 5 year old she is dumb and stupid. They also come into my home and jump on my furniture, sream shut up to my daughter and then get offended if I say something to them. My sister thinks they are angels and I am the one with the problem. What do you think?
2007-07-22 12:51:08 · 29 answers · asked by Amanda W 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Don't allow them to come over until your sister agrees to make them respect you, your daughter and your home. Otherwise, they will continue to walk all over you.
2007-07-22 13:21:54 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Set the rules for your house and make sure your sister hears it. If she doesn't get it, hopefully her kids will. I'm guessing that if her kids are over what seems to be a lot, you have a decent relationship with her. She will probably feel something for her niece if you say it hurts your daughter when her kids call her names. Don't worry about the feelings of her kids until they respect your feelings in return. Stick to your rules.
I have the same situation. When my nieces or nephews break the rules at my house, I give them a time out or make them sit next to me for a period of time. If their mom or dad comes down during the punishment and asks what happened, I explain it and let them know that I'll see this punishment through. Luckily I haven't had to explain myself to the parents. If I did, though, I'd just say that I was there and had to exact some type of discipline and, since I was the one who handed it down, I'll see it through.
2007-07-22 20:54:14 · answer #2 · answered by Clarissa N 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
perhaps that is how your sister talks to her kids?
if your sister cant support you in maintaining control in YOUR house - then i would stop having them come over and explain that you cant cope with all of them at once because of the bullying going on against your daughter in her own home
another thing - sometimes kids do act differently around their parents than they do for other people - BUT that does NOT mean that your sister ought to get away with NOT supporting you if HER kids are acting YOU up even when she is not present
2007-07-22 13:02:52 · answer #3 · answered by Aslan 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take control of your situation. Discipline those children in your home. Say things like "at aunt blah blahs house the couch is not for jumping." If your sister does not like it then she does not have to come around. Eventually she will get over it and realize it.
2007-07-22 12:55:54 · answer #4 · answered by Court 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell your sister that you will put them in a time-out if they are disrespectful to you and see what she says. You should NOT spank them because they are not your own kids and people get pretty offensive over that kind of stuff. When you watch them just tell them if they do something wrong they are going in time out AND FOLLOW THRU! It will help!
2007-07-22 12:56:36 · answer #5 · answered by alli7201 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel ur pain! I went thru this with my sis in law!
It's ur house ur rules! U need to tell ur sister that her kids dont need to be jumpin on ur couches! As for her kids callin ur child dumb, and stupid! It's hard to say! I put my sis' daughter in time out for that! She use to be disrespectul to me to! Well she respects me and my children now!
It's hard when it comes to ur nieces and nephews, but they shouldnt be callin ur daughter any names either!
I know it's a tough situation just talk with ur sis, she may get upset at first but then u will have things settled!
Best of luck to ya!
2007-07-22 13:11:48 · answer #6 · answered by woohooo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I remember my mom had this problem with her friend's kids when she was watching them. their mom just let them do whatever, so they tried it with my mom. Kids learned to treat my mom with respect and behave when she was around. I remember, when we were at a picnic, a friend's kids were running around and throwing rocks and stuff. Mom got tired of it and set them down on one of the beachtowels, saying that everytime they did something they knew was wrong, she'd carry them over and they would stay there until SHE said they were ready. I remember, my mom would make kids who were misbehaving sit on their hands (not to hurt, but so they couldnt play with anything) and she would make a point to do something fun with the rest of us. When I broke a rule or did something I knew that I shouldn't have, she would send me to my brother's room (so I couldnt play with MY toys) and she would play loudly with my brother saying "too bad your sister ....." some ppl thought it was mean, but it made me learn that, if you misbehave, you miss out.
One suggestion (because saying they wrrent welcome could start a whole load of poo. Sheesh. My family is bad about grudges and taking sides) is that you have a neutral quiet space that you could send them to. Not a corner b/c then they act out to show off, but a place where they can't break anything or hurt themselves. Just leave them there, b/c you're giving them the attention that they want. If you take it away, then they won't have that drive. Plus, I would have them "work off" any damages. My mom made my cousin do that when she caught him stealing from her purse. He had to do all MY chores, my bros chores, wash the cars, AND wasn't allowed to do anything until his mom came home 3 weeks later.
2007-07-23 22:46:06 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
STAY AWAY FROM THEM. I mean avoid the kids at all costs. That will send the massage to your sister that she needs to step up the parenting.
Good Luck
2007-07-22 20:51:45 · answer #8 · answered by olschoolmom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think I wouldn't allow them in my home and tell my sister why...(set up a camera and show your sister the truth...she probably already knows it and prefers to look the other way.
2007-07-22 12:54:04 · answer #9 · answered by Chrys 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Punish them, firmly tell them they don't have any right to disrespect your house that way & if they do it again you will stick them in time out & tell their mother. Remember it's your house, your rules, but beware you may come off as mean aunt so & so, but don't be afraid to do mankind a favor.
2007-07-22 13:24:37 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋