ok im 14 an 17 yearold bf of 4 years are engaged an want ur advice are we to young to get married?
2007-07-22 09:56:30 · 19 answers · asked by baby_gurl_so_sexy!! 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
In most states, you can't legally get married without parents permission until you are 17 or 18 anyway, so don't sweat it, enjoy being young. If he wants a commitment, he can get you a promise ring that you can wear until you are older and can start thinking about legally getting married. It is a promise that you'll get engaged someday, and if it works out, you probably will. A lot will change in your lives between now and 3 or 4 years from now. Don't be in a rush. If oyu love each other, you'll have the rest of your lives to be together. Best wishes!
2007-07-22 15:19:22 · answer #1 · answered by LoveWithNoBoundaries 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's a reason why 14 year-olds are not allowed to drive, vote or drink. You're not old enough to sign a legal contract. Your brain won't be finished developing for another 10 years. No state in the union will allow a 14 year-old to get married. You can check that out here: http://www.coolnurse.com/marriage_laws.htm You can't support yourself, much less a child. Do your parents know you're "engaged?" and likely sexually active? I hope you're using birth control correctly b/c teenages as young as you guys should not be having babies.
P.S. to PSpoptart: I don't think there are any states that will allow a 14 year-old to marry even with parental permission. Unfortunately, I think there are a few that allow a 15 year-old to under certain circumstances.
2007-07-22 17:14:50 · answer #2 · answered by Ms. X 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes. You are too young. You have not even gotten a proper education which is not only a right but a privledge of living in the US...you need to finish school, you need to understand that your boyfriend is 3 years older than you and in order to be dating someone that much younger (when you are the ages you are) is not only illegal, but shows that he is immature or you are very mature. Even if it is that you are very mature, then that means you should think this through and reason that you are not old enough, responsible enough or mature enough to be married. What if you have children right away? You will not even have graduated high school and how do you support your children without an education? All of these things are possible, but it makes life SOOO much harder. Marriage is hard enough without all of the problems you are trying to add to it.
2007-07-22 19:17:23 · answer #3 · answered by its about time 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ABSOLUTELY TOO YOUNG!!!!! look at it this way---> is there anything that u are so completely sure of at 14 that u would be willing to say i want this forever?? home, job, education, friends, etc????? I know when i was 14 there was nothing i was sure of to the point i would say yes to forever!!!
You need to be outta school and in the real world to make that kinda commitment. I understand that when u are 14 & u think u are in love it may seem rational, but you need to grow up and get some life experience... i'm not necessarily talking about dating experience, but life experience so you know what u want for your future.....it is a big decision and not one to be taken lightly.
Good Luck
2007-07-23 13:24:34 · answer #4 · answered by legends_chick 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the short answer is yes you are to young.
at 14 you see the world as right now...at 20 you will look at 14 as "what was I thinking" at 30 you will look at 20 as "how stupid can one be". At 40 you will see 30 as as being nieve and at 50 you will wonder how you got so far after these younger thoughts paved your way.
You are hot and heavy now but there is a long life ahead. I don't know you but 14 is way early in the journey to get married. Good Luck
2007-07-22 17:24:57 · answer #5 · answered by tagway 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't want to seem insensitive to your question because I do understand that you are in love and want to settle down with your bf. However, you really are too young. In the past two years I've had about half my friends get married in their early twenties. Nearly all of them have problems, are divorced, or separated. A few are hanging on and I am not saying you can't be one of the few but, the ones that didn't make it- when I asked why they all told be its because they got married too soon and they were too young. Everyone I know has changed from the time they were teens to now (they are in their early and mid twenties). Give each other time to change individually.
My one friend who nearly got divorced but is managing to patch things up with her husband gave this advice to one of our friends. I pass it on to you. "If you are going to be together forever, there is no rush. You are going to spend the rest of your lives together. You don't need a ring right away to prove that. If you are truly meant to be than its not going to matter that you have to wait a few more years to get married. "
Good luck, and I really do mean what I said above. If you are going to be together forever, then you have the time to wait to get married. Good luck to both of you again.
2007-07-22 17:44:56 · answer #6 · answered by Charmed S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely you are too young! Do your parents know you are engaged?
You will have a lot more life experiences and be changing as a person through your teens and early 20's. By then you may not be the same person or have the same feelings you do now.
Also, once your boyfriend turns 18, he can be arrested for statutory rape if you and he are having sex.
Please give this some serious thought.
2007-07-22 17:36:57 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are way too young!!! You started dating this guy when you were 10! You are probably a freshman, not even done with hs. Wait a little and see how the relationship develops during school and then reconsider it. You shouldn't even be engaged at 14.
2007-07-22 17:06:03 · answer #8 · answered by I<3Twilight 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The truth is NOT something you will want to hear... You re both WAY to young to even THINK about marriage. You're only 14. No offense, but teens have NO idea what they want.
IF this is REALLY TRUE LOVE, it can wait until you are both MUCH older. (early to mid 20's) If it really is forever, there should be NOTHING wrong with waiting because you will BOTH still be there ready to commit.
IF it is not however, you will have SAVED yourself from a terrible mistake. TIME is on YOUR side.... Let it work FOR you, and enjoy the chance to be a kid while you still can. I'd give my teeth to be a teen again. ENJOY it!
2007-07-22 17:03:58 · answer #9 · answered by Rav 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes, both of you are. You're 14! Get married after you've seen the world a little, and you know for sure what you want. Also, make sure that you can support yourself, and if needed live independently of your husband. Also, if you have kids, you might not be able to stay in school! Lead a fabulous, care free life for now, and get married later
2007-07-22 17:02:41 · answer #10 · answered by Meera K 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋