I think they resent me for not having a crew up life(let me explain). Most of my family for the most part are a mess in my opinion. All children are out of wedlock, their mates are either criminals or abusers. They have little or no education. They are constanly pushing me to have a baby or live with my boyfriend( I know not out of love for me). The question is Should I put this people in my past and walk away from them and get one with my life? I have been thinking about this for a few years not seriouly.
2007-07-22 00:54:43 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
A friend of mine once said that if you didn't have a very nurturing family of origin, then you can cultivate a family of choice around you. It will just be as good as if you've had the family you wanted all your life. I think in a sense, you're lucky because they're not forcing you to stay. I've been trying to get away for the last 3 years or so and now that I'm working, they still won't let me go. And all I want is a safe space. If you are not being forced to stay, I suggest that you find a friend who is truly supportive and caring of you and you could stay for a while. The change in the emotional climate will be well worth it and will help you clear out a lot of the dysfunction and stuff. Best of luck! Oh, and with regards to the whole baby-boyfriend thing, I think it's good that you are making decisions based on what's healthy for you and not based on what they want you to do.
2007-07-22 01:02:39 · answer #1 · answered by Nadz U 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
hi...
your family is typically dysfunctional.
it's YOUR decision whether to have a child (which is a lifetime committment, and very expensive, not to mention emotionally draining, especially if you're not prepaed at this time). It's also YOUR decision whether to live with a boyfriend or not.
perhaps these people want to see you take the same, desolate path they have in life?
it's up to you whether you want to walk away or not. you could distance yourself, and do your own thing.
you could also consider letting your family know you will run your life as you see fit, and you're unprepared to have a child or live with a boyfriend. .....and they are intruding upon your privacy by asking.
unfortunately, they might not know what you're talking about if you'd tell them this... but it's worth a try.
i wish you all the best. sorry you don't have a better support system... but i'm glad you have some common sense!
take care.
2007-07-22 01:02:40 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good for you that you have a good life! Cherish that. I can not tell you wether to break all bonds with your family or not. Only you know if there is any value in your relationship. But I would say that you should surround yourself with people who lift you up and are there for you rather than the opposite.
2007-07-22 01:05:24 · answer #3 · answered by Annie 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know you don't agree with your family and that's all right we are all different so we won't always agree. But ask yourself this would they as a hole turn their back on you. Friends/men come and go family will always be family. Just don't tell them your business live your own life but make sure you call them and tell them hi and ou love them. You never know what you got until it is gone.
2007-07-22 01:03:20 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You lead your life the way you see fit. You can pick your friends, but not your family. You accept them for who they are,but that doesn't mean you have to become them. If being around them will change you to person you don't want to be, then move. They will always be your family, no matter how sad they are.
2007-07-22 01:03:35 · answer #5 · answered by LIPPIE 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Boo Hoo... Poor baby! Butch up and quit worring about external support! Be your own person and let the rest of the world catch up!
2007-07-22 01:01:16 · answer #6 · answered by the_pharaoh109 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Don't let anyone, including your family, make your life decisions for you.
2007-07-22 00:58:32 · answer #7 · answered by T Leeves 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
With them as examples, you shouldn't walk away, you should run away from them as far and as fast as you can.
2007-07-22 01:00:21 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋