My father has been evaluated and stated to have mild dementia. He forgets to eat, bathe, and health issues.?

Question

His weight is progressivly going down, and he will not go to the doctor unless I take him.....he is 79. I work and know that he need assisted living, or he will kill himself, due to his forgetfullness, yet the doctors say he is computent to live independently.
What should I do to protect him......I work outside of the home, I can not take him in. My sister will steal his income if he moves in with her...for her alchole problem.

Answer 1

I would go see another doctor and talk to them. Apparently your doctor doesn't seem to do much about such things and you are entitled to as many opinions as you want. I would just keep looking until you find a doctor that will listen to you. I know it is a long and tedious process and that you are doing the best you can for your father. I certainly wish you luck.

Answer 2

Find another doctor that will genuinely listen to your concerns.

I understand where you're coming from. My husband and I are moving into a house with his grandparents next week to help care for his grandfather who is has middle to late stage alzheimer's disease. We pooled our money together and purchased a "family compound" that they will live at and we will all take turns staying there to care for them. We figured we'd be spending the money anyway, why not invest the money in a house instead?
Bear in mind, I have no idea of your financial situation, but I'm throwing a few thoughts out there for you:
The problem with just sending him to a nursing home is that he may still be too aware and may fight you every step of the way. Not to mention that they are incredibly expensive. We were faced with a bill of almost $4000 per month for a care facility, and we don't know how long he'll live, so the money could really add up. (Think about that carefully.)
If you simply aren't in a situation that you could have him move in with you until his condition is severe, (there are tons of people having to do that as we speak) then I suggest you do some careful research on care facilities. There are some that start off as assisted living, and move on to more involved care
Many are like condo's with emergency buttons and have caregivers available to check on them regularly, then they adjust the amount of care they give according to the needs of the patient. But, as the amount of care increases, so does the monthly cost.
Just understand that dementia is a slow progressive disease, and he may have several years ahead of him. It would be worse to put him in a facility now and run out of money for it when he's in the late stage of the disease and requires 24 hour care.
You may need to call a family meeting and discuss the situation with your father. Is he aware he has dementia? Does he know the nature of your sister and what will happen if he moves in with her? Do you have other siblings you could call on for help?
No matter how you decide to handle the living situation, I strongly urge you to seek a second opinion on your father's health issues.

Answer 3

First thing you should do is consider going to a specialist (you could consider a psychiatrist or a physician who specializes in dementia). Regarding his forgetfulness with daily routines, there are people that will come into the home to help care for him. This can be a great alternative to assisted living facilities, but as with them you will need to make sure they are doing what they should be, treating him right, and not taking advantage of his state.

This will be an extremely difficult period for you, your father, and your family. There are support groups out there that can help you deal with the difficulties and added responsibilities. Good luck to you.

Answer 4

Find a new doctor and see if there is a home care program that will provide him with a personal care giver during the time between now and when you find him a nursing home bed.

One thing my family did for my grandmothers who were losing their capacity to live independently was to get cases of meal replacement drink cans and make sure they were available to them. That way, he can grab a high calorie drink from the fridge and think it's chocolate milk. Making a schedule and having it posted around his home might help remind him of what he should be doing. A fixed routine could provide some stability for him.

In my nursing home experience, I found that when the same thing happens regularly, the people who apparently couldn't remember things would sort of know that something should happen at a certain time or day. One, who was severely demented, would see me and say: "oh, there you are. I was expecting you." Consistency seemed to effect them well.

Answer 5

Have you consulted a doctor with certification in gerontology? There are some new drugs out that can 'catch' people with mild dementia before it gets worse. But the longer you wait, the less chance there is for the meds to work. There are doctors and there are GOOD doctors. You need to find a really good one with experience in this field.

Answer 6

Call your local hospital, ask for the Social Worker.

Consider having an indepth conversation. The Social Worker
is there to assist people in the knowledge of what is available in your community and how to get connected with those services.
Someone in your community can assess his need, and can recommend what options might be available, given his current impairment, as well as what his insurance or government will pay for.

Some of the adult daycare programs have really helped families out.

You are wise to not consider your sister, given her selfish motivation. Your main goal needs to be your Dad's care.

Answer 7

Fish oil supplements, and Gingko Biloba. Avoid alumin(i(um, as in cooking, antiperspirants & some antacids. Cook/bring a nutritious meal, high in oil/fat, and eat (some) with him. Satay beef in peanut butter, with potato mashed with olive oil and cream, or butter, broccoli, yam (sweet potato) & an avocado/cashew salad is ideal, but even fried chicken, (in extra virgin olive oil, or coconut oil: see www.mercola.com) beans, peas, corn, carrots & spinach/cabbage is good. Get an enduring power of attorney NOW! A court order, in your favor, preventing change to this, without further review by a magistrate/judge would be ideal. US laws??? Let him live with her, but you control the pursestrings (if she tries to change this, which she may work on him to do, threaten to take it to court, and blow it all on expensive lawyers). Seek legal advice, soon. Suggest she brews her own beer/make wine, or distill spirits.

Answer 8

hullo
from your account, it is more than mild dementia, i would call it moderate to severe case of primary type Alzheimer,still one should bore in mind senile depression, which can mimic dementia(pseudo dementia).
in your case a senior house might be more safe than an ordinary household.
dementia can be diagnosed easily by a proper psychiatric evaluation and tests as MRI.

Dr solo

Answer 9

Your first step is to have your father 'evaluated' by an 'impartial psychologist' ... and if he is found by that psychologist to have 'dementia' that is increasing, you can go to court to 'sue' for your father and his assets to be put under YOUR control ... you may be asked to 'prove' that your sister and her 'alcohol problem' make her 'ineligible' for that job. Once you have your father's 'power of attorney' you may then have 'access' to his savings, and can then decide whether he should be put into an 'assisted living' situation, a nursing home' or cared for by a 'caretaker' (paid from his savings) at his own home. You'll need a good attorney, and you should do this IMMEDIATELY to protect your father and his 'savings' ... people can live long lives with mild dementia ... and your DAD needs his savings, not you or your sister.

Answer 10

Regardless of what the doctor says, get him into a nursing home...the mild dementia is turning into alzheimers and that will kill him