Something really wrong you could never expect she'd do and let the family down. Lies, jealousy. You feel like crap as a parent. I know she's a good kid, something went wrong. What to do now? I must find a way to deal with this so that the girl fixes her mistake and we all get over this and everything is as before. When I was a teen something similar happened with the children of a couple friend of my parents. They gave him a harsh punishment. It worked but almost destroyed the boy emotionally. He never got over. Today, 25 years later, he's a great guy, great father, but hardly talks with his parents. A broken family. This would make me and my wife devastated.
2007-07-21 15:36:05 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
15 is a rough age, but 15 is the age before major teenager years. So if you don't want her to do whatever she did again, you need a strong punishment. Explain to her why is was wrong. If you don't do anything or not enough, it may get worse or happen again.
Good Luck
2007-07-21 15:39:52 · answer #1 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your daughter will continue to make mistakes. It's what 15 year olds do. It's called growing and learning. You, as the parents, are there to love and teach her. You know she's a good kid. She just screwed up. Lies and jealousy come from insecurity. Help her feel more secure in herself.
Instead of being hard on her, explain to her that no matter what, you'll always love her. Also talk to her about the lessons in what she did wrong. Let her know there will be consequences. Allow her to help decide what they should be. You may find that she's harder on herself than the two of you would be. Hopefully things won't go back to the way they were before. Hopefully, she'll come out of this a little wiser and a little more mature.
Once she's paid her dues, then move forward and the next time she screws up remind her of what just happened and continue to build the lessons until she gets it. She's learning, you're her teachers. It sounds like she's got some good parents. All the best to you.
2007-07-21 15:53:25 · answer #2 · answered by innerradiancecoaching 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What exactly did she do? All kids rebel. I used to steal stuff, lie to my parents, smoke cigs and other things, my parents instilled their good morals in me and let me figure my own way through life. I am a great person now and I do none of the things that I used to. As long as you have let her know what is right and what is wrong, then she should be okay. She will def make mistakes and do things that you don't like, but don't be too harsh or she will hate you forever. On the other hand, depending on how bad the things she is doing are, you might need to get her help from elsewhere.. like a counselor perhaps. She is already 15 so don't punish her as if she were 5. Talk to her like an adult and ask her what is going on.
2007-07-21 15:43:21 · answer #3 · answered by meeeeeeeee2681 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think parents should remember what it was like when they were the ages of their children. Were you perfect? Did you not make mistakes? Did you not act very silly and immature at times?
Girls do some things sometimes and some of it comes from puberty and all the changes that go along with it. Some comes from PMS and the emotional roller-coaster ride that young women sometimes go through. Sometimes it is peer pressure. Find out WHY she did whatever it was, first. Try to get her to feel comfortable enough with you to answer honestly. Keep the communication good. For starters, be her friend, so that she CAN talk to you. There may be other people involved that persuaded her to do this. Maybe she is seeking your undivided attention. Maybe the answer is all of the above.
I am a mom of three grown kids and one small fry. No one ever said parenting was easy, but remember what it was like when you were her age. That is an easy thing to forget, but try! Good luck and God bless!
2007-07-21 15:43:55 · answer #4 · answered by BLM 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I would put a firm foot down without yelling, etc. You have to give a punishment. I think the punishment and discipline should give a taste for what would happen as an adult.
So, if a teen does something they should pay for it if it cost money (work it off with the parents if necessary). Apologize if that is needed. Volunteer if they need to learn respect for others. Clean if they make a mess, etc. Make the punishment last in their mind but emphasize responsibility. And, point out that you would like them to grow up to be a upstanding person.
2007-07-21 15:43:50 · answer #5 · answered by 354gr 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Act like good parents should and discipline the child accordingly. Like take away from her the one thing that she loves/depends on/ or thinks she can't do without, as well as ground her/ and make her make amends for whatever it is that she done wrongly. Whatever you do, once you have told her what her punishment is, don't under any circumstances let her emotionally blackmail you into lessening the sentence that you have handed down to her. For this to work she must understand that you are very firm on this punishment and will not change your minds about it. Good Luck and God Bless.
2007-07-21 15:46:13 · answer #6 · answered by Alwyn C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a child I would understand that what I did was wrong and that I do indeed deserve the punishment. Just reasure your daughter that what you are doing is only because you want her to turn out as a better person later on in life. Then tell her you still love her no matter what she does.
2007-07-21 15:44:59 · answer #7 · answered by Pop Princess 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you have a lot of judgment here. Consider this...she was doing the best she could. Her judgment is that of a 15-year-old, not a 30 plus parent. You see consequences that she doesn't see. You understand life problems that she hasn't even begun to explore. So give her love and support and help her. he needs it.
2007-07-21 15:40:53 · answer #8 · answered by judgebill 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Punishments won't help a ton. I suggest letting her know that you are disappointed-- DO NOT YELL-- i hate my parents for yelling at me every time I do something wrong. Make sure she knows that you you are disappointed, but you know she's a good person, and just made a mistake.
2007-07-21 15:47:54 · answer #9 · answered by Crappy Haircut Girl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u tell the they should never do it agian. and tell them this is a warning and if the do it agian it will be sever consiquences. dont scare them, but just make them realize whta they have done it horrible. try the cold shoulder for a day or so. but try not to give them one of the full house show talks. it never happens. btw shes 15, its a confusing age(im 15, almost 16). cut her some slack, but not enougfh it could harm her future
2007-07-21 15:42:02 · answer #10 · answered by Phoebe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋