Wedding Favors - Changed my mind?

Question

Darn it! I let my mom choose the wedding favors because she did a great job with favors for past showers. But now I am having second thoughts.

From reading various posts here, and magazines, etc. I am thinking that her choice may not have been the greatest. She chose these shot glasses http://www.discountmugs.com/usa/glassware-5120-cl-clearshot-glassess.htm

Now I think I'd rather have something like this http://www.favorwarehouse.com/favors/d4157.html and use them as place cards. Then the guests wouldn't have something with our names plastered all over them, they are actually equally priced (maybe actually LESS expensive, and I think more elegant - and functional.

I don't need to hear about how favors are required, waste of money or anything else along those lines. That is not the point, nor is it relevant here.

I don't think I want to hurt mom's feelings and tell her I am having second thoughts about the favors (it might be too late anyways)

What if I do both???

Just to add some perspective. We are mid-thirties. Not even CLOSE to being alcoholics. I'm not against alcohol, but do't really care for it. I'll probably toast with 7-up! LOL. My fiance is a former Marine, Police Officer, and does have a beer every so often, but far from being a boozer. So I think anyone who knows us at all wouldn't think anything of the sort about us.

Answer 1

I actually think the shot glass and the frame sort of match because of the hearts, so go for it, particularly if she has already bought them. Just tell her you want the frame for a placeholder and you don't even have to mention whether you thought the shot glass was tacky. I like the idea of putting it on bar though. Perhaps you can mention that you think it may be too crowded to have both by the plate and suggest the bar. Another thought besides candles or flowers (both good idea): Fill the shotglass with wedding mints or colored M&Ms. Or...possibly ask the caterer to fold the napkin in an interesting way into it. It may make it more interesting.

Answer 2

Those are beautiful frames, nicer than some plain ones that I have seen used. If it's in your budget, I say go for it. I can definately see your point about the shot glasses. I went to a wedding a while back and the favours were shot glasses and coasters. Not really a boozer myself, lol, but the groom certainly was.

If you are worried about hurting your Mom's feelings, you may think it's a bigger deal to her than it actually is. I don't think that she would be hurt. She may have just picked it because it's a trinket sort of thing and the budget allowed perhaps. I'm sure if you talked to her about it, she would understand, and think the picture frames were a really good idea!

If you do both, cool. But I don't know, a picture frame and a shot glass don't really go together. It could be just me though. :)

Good luck!!!!! :)

Answer 3

A couple things- I like the picture frame because it looks for elegant and would look beautiful as a place card and the guests would definitely make use out of them.

Ask your mom first what the status of the party favors are. If she has yet to order them polietly show her what you would prefer. Ask her to be honest in her response as you don't want to offend her and mention how HUGE of a HELP she has been and is continuing to be during the wedding process. Just mention that some people don't drink and this way they can cherish any picture that is dear to them be it of the couple to be, family, parents, etc...

It sounds like your mom has a vital spot in your life/soul. Give her the benefit of this and be honest. I am sure she would rather see you happy then find out via someone else that you weren't too fond of her choice.

Sorry this is long but I hope it helps. Summary: be honest

Answer 4

#1: Favors with your names/dates all over them are popular with immediate family, maybe closest friends...not with the rest of your guests. So, while the shot glasses are very cute, Your Mom may end up finding a ton of shot glasses left behind at the reception.

#2 Using Favor/ Place card holders is a 2 for 1 deal...you get a functional item for the wedding and your guests can use it later as a frame. When you send your "Thank You" cards out later, include a picture of you and your husband, in the same size as your frame favor holds.

#3... Talk to Mom. Tell her how much you appreciate the fact that she is involved with your wedding...and how important it is to you that she give her opinion and help you. However, explain your logic...explain your thinking when it comes to the favors, and ask for her opinion about the frames instead of the shot glasses. See what she says.

If the shot glasses are already ordered, take them with the same spirit you would take a gift....say Thank you, accept them, use them at your wedding, and appreciate the gesture she made by buying them. While they may not be ideal favors, they were chosen by someone you love, with her best intentions.

Good luck hon, and Congrats on your pending Wedding!
Kat

Answer 5

Didn't your mom get your input BEFORE ordering? I'm not sure why ANYONE except a family full of alcoholics would EVER give shot glasses as a wedding favor. Sorry - but that's just tacky. The picture frames are much more elegant and seem to reflect your personality more.

Answer 6

Do both. If you can I would cancel the shotglass order or change it so it's all the wedding date. Then have them at the bar and people can take them if they want to and the favors at the table. Your mother will be happy because you are using her idea but still be elegant.

I'm 22 and if I saw a shot glass as a wedding favor I would think the couple was a bunch of booze hounds....I know the older crowd would definately not think it in good taste.

Answer 7

I agree with you, the frames are much nicer than the shot glasses. Shot glasses would have been great if you going totally over the top and having favors at the bachlorette party. Hey, there you go, give them out at the parties and then give the frames at the wedding.

Answer 8

I love the picture frame idea and I think the shot glasses are a little tacky...tell your mom that you think the picture frames are more classy and your guest would appreciate them more and not everyone drinks and some people might get offended. And if that doesn't work remember its your wedding and your day it should be your way or the highway!! You mom will get over it.

Answer 9

Personally - I'd rather have the shot glass than the frame. I'm not a 'boozer' either, but I have found that a good shot glass is great when you need to take liquid medicine and someone else in the house misplaced the little plastic glass from the top! It's a good measuring device not relegated strictly to alcohol.

I have too many frames that are in a drawer in my attic right now....sorry.

Answer 10

If you decide to keep the shot glasses but you don't like the alcohol part of them - go to a craft store and buy candle making stuff. You can get a wick and melt down some wax and turn them into little votive candles.