2007-07-21 14:25:35 · 18 answers · asked by scott t 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Tell her you are honored and delighted by her request. Tell her you will be happy to do it. Then say . . . "I don't want to cause any problems with your dad though. If this upsets him in any way, I will be glad to step back and not escort you. It will not hurt my feelings. You just let me know how you want to handle it."
Leave it up to bride to decide.
And I think you are a great stepdad to be concerned. It's nice to see a stepdad who only cares about stepdaughter's happiness.
2007-07-21 14:34:05 · answer #1 · answered by Suz123 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My older brother had the same thing happen to him except he was the father that was pushed off for the step dad and I really thought that was crappy of my niece. My brother's a doctor and always paid all his child support, sent her to colledge, always brought her here to visit him and the family. [ Her mother had re-married and her husband moved them 2500 miles away from here] so my brother had always bought her a plane ticket and one of her friends to bring them here if he didn't go there to see her. Plus her mother was on this speical medication that my brother paid for all time. And her new husband made 5-7 hundred tho a year at his job!!!!!! So he could have bought her the meds that she needed, but no my brother did it all. She had came out to see my brother a couple of months before she got married and let him meet her bf. Before they went home my brother gave her 10 thousand dollars as a gift, so they had a nice honeymoon. He also paid for her wedding!!!!!!!!!!!! when he ask her about his tux she never gave an answer so when she got home she wrote him a letter and said by the way my step dad is giving me away!! If her dad's helping to pay for the wedding and his been a good father to her then he has the right to give her away. Now if he hasn't and his not doing anything to help her with her wedding then sure that's different and you should give her away. You think about everything and then you decide if you should do this or not. If you think he should then you need to talk to her and explain to her why he should and not you. Sometimes girls do this because of their moms not because they just want their step dad to do it. They know that their mom would love it if their step dad walked them in stead of their dad. And honestly it's really to just throw a dart at them without having to do it on their own. And that's wrong on every level.
2007-07-21 22:03:35 · answer #2 · answered by Countrygirl 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The answer is quite clear if everyone remembers that it is HER wedding day. Whatever she wants, within reason, should be honored. She must feel very close to both her father and her step-mother. How perfectly wonderful. Respect her wishes and hopefully her father will understand and rise above his own jealousies. This is the Bride and Groom's celebration and committment of their love for each other.
2007-07-21 21:43:49 · answer #3 · answered by marval7230 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
At the end of the day, it's her wedding, not her real fathers. If you've been a big part of her life, she'd probably want you there, since you're also "giving her away" as a daughter. Just do what she wants, and ignore her real dad. In our wedding, I'm having my bf's step-dad walk me down, since my father is no longer with us. His real dad is going to be there, but his step-dad is the only man I've ever known to be a father to him (and I). If she asked you to, it obviously means a lot to her.
2007-07-21 21:36:36 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would honor whatever your step-daughter wants. It's HER wedding and it shouldn't matter that it makes the father mad. Obviously you were there for her as a father and she feels strongly that she wants to honor that. You should feel so proud and very loved. Just ignore him and make sure he doesn't make HER feel like crap on her special day. He could really ruin it for her.
2007-07-21 23:11:50 · answer #5 · answered by bestadvicechick 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is your step-daughters day!!! Her father should respect her wishes on what she wants. What does the groom think? Does he get along with the father-of-the-bride? Get him on side and try to make your partner see reason that although it is a proud moment for him to be able to give his daughter away, he should respect her wishes in wanting you to be a part of that special moment too.
Good luck and tell the bride and groom congratulations, I wish them a long and happy life together.
2007-07-21 22:00:59 · answer #6 · answered by Kelly R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could walk her half way down the aisle where her father would be waiting to walk her the rest of the way to her groom. I've seen this done at several weddings.
2007-07-21 21:32:01 · answer #7 · answered by Darlene mouse 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Talk to her about a compromise and just explain that her real father is going to be really hurt if he is left out. If the relationship is already really strained and she doesn't care I say go ahead and escort her. Let one of you walk her halfway down the aisle and let the other one take her to her husband. Which ever guy she felt contributed the most can be the last one who give her away.
2007-07-21 21:29:30 · answer #8 · answered by pspoptart 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think the fact that you are concerned about both your step daughers feeling and the feelings of her father says a lot about the type of person you are. I agree that if she wants you to escort her then you should, you obviously mean a lot to her, and maybe she can explain that to her dad so that he can understand.
I think she is really lucky to have 2 dads that care about her.
Good luck!
2007-07-21 21:35:57 · answer #9 · answered by Reba 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe not. Tell her you don't want to come between her and her dad. Maybe you could just send her down the aisle with a kiss or something, and let her dad be the one to actually walk her down.
2007-07-22 00:04:43 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋