How do single Christians deal with it?

Question

How do Christian guys and girls who are single deal with their sexual desires when those issues crop up?
I know what the Bible says, but what do you really do on a day to day basis when it crops up.

OK, I know you don't go out and get all sweaty with other people. What about taking care of business for yourself?

Answer 1

(Rom 12:2 KJV) And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.
Keep God's word on the subject going into you mind before temptation comes up that way your mind will be thinking on things that are pure, and holy, and true and it will be easier to resist temptation.

Answer 2

I will say that it is difficult. VERY difficult and putting a purity ring on my finger wouldn't help much. I could paint purity all over my walls and that wouldn't help. Sex is everywhere, and while it may be simple for some people, it isn't for me. The important thing is to read the bible (thy word i have hidden in my heart that i might not sin against thee) and pray, and maintain an attitude of prayer and worship throughout the day. Also, when sexual thoughts come to mind, immediately replace them with good thoughts. If you let them sit there and build a nest, they will. Also, I try not to be alone with the opposite sex and I try not to watch shows that have a lot of sexual scenes. Fun, huh? Anyhow, when I do those things, I'm fine. But when I get busy surfing the net or shopping or doing other stuff and find that I "don't have time" for God and the Word, I start to struggle and in the past have fallen.

This is a valid question and I'm not going to pretend that I'm super-christian because the fact that the church isn't dealing with these very real desires is making it difficult for Christians who struggle with this issue to deal with it and get help if necessary.

Answer 3

I find it incredibly hard. I have fallen from grace during my walk. I find it hard to meet someone who is looking for a serious relationship because peoples standards are lower when they are they are not specifically looking for a life partner. There are few women of my age group at my church, and of those, most I am unnattracted to.

I don't have the complete answer. But two things I try to do is:
1. Don't allow my mind to wander in lustful thoughts.
"If your eye offends you cut it out"
2. Accept my position as the will of god.

Given the number of destructive and unhealthy relationships that are starting and going on these days and given the number of people with a selfish attitude toward relationships, being single isn't necessarily a bad thing. Whilst there is the unfulfilled passion, life is far less complicated. We must learn to overcome our desires of the flesh.

Overcoming isn't just a part of Christianity, it is our main purpose. When suffering, we must learn to take up the armor of God.

"Who is he that overcometh the world, but he that believeth that Jesus is the Son of God?"

Answer 4

On a day-to-day basis when it -- sexual desire or anything else -- crops up, a Christian who is serious about his Christianity really does what the Bible says.

Answer 5

What are 'those issues'?

If you are talking about 'doing it', it is a matter of not doing it, and it takes self discipline like any other thing you don't want to do - yet eg fasting. Christianity practices build mental strength and discipline, that's how Christian singles learn not to do it, till they are married. In addition, there is such a thing as delaying gratification, and part of that is looking forward to sex when they are married.

Catholic nuns are celibate. They take a vow of poverty, chastity and obedience when they join as nuns. There is a purpose and reason for each of these vows, and if you know them, they are very noble aims to be achieved, and hence the motivation to keep the vows.

If you would like to know more, read and find out more about Christianity. You can start here.

http://www.vatican.va/archive/catechism/ccc_toc.htm

Answer 6

They probably deal with it the same way I did when I was young. Get a life, a hobby, a sport. Spend time with friends, doing things, not in the back seats of cars alone with boys.

But I was not a Christian then, so what do I know. It would be a lot easier with the faith that I now have.

Answer 7

Hi there.

The honest answer is, with GREAT difficulty.

However -

"As a father pities his children, so the LORD pities those who fear Him. For He knows our frame; He remembers that we are dust." Psalm 103:13 & 14.

"If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness." 1 John 1:9.

That does not mean that God condones sin or will refrain from administering discipline to those Christians who are consistently disobedient to His commands regarding sexual conduct. But surely, a God who is all-knowing, gracious and forgiving to those who love Him and truly desire to obey Him, is sympathetic to us who struggle with our single status.

My sincere prayer is that, in His perfect time, God will provide all of His children with godly, loving Christian spouses who will be a true blessing & encouragement to us in our walk with God. In the meantime, may He continue to be gracious to us, and strengthen us in our weakness.

Blessings, Carl (single, celibate and seeking a godly companion from the Lord since May 1999 !)

"For we do not have a High Priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly before the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need." Hebrews 4:15 & 16.

Answer 8

as a girl who is a Christian, I don't think about those things. I focus on God and what His plans of the day are for me. I tend to surround myself with people or friends so those issues arent usually a problem.

Answer 9

Speaking as a single, celibate, Catholic female but NOT a religious, I do the following.

First I gawk at hunky guys and sigh a lot.
Then I pray.
Then I remember why I chose celibacy in the first place.
Then I thank God.

Answer 10

Not all Christians believe that sex before marriage is wrong.
I and my Girlfriend are Catholics but we don't believe that sex before we are married is wrong if you are sure at the time that the person you are with is the person you will be with for the rest of your life.
I can't speak for the rest of the Christian world but this is my perspective.
Irresponsible and immoral sex before marriage is wrong. Sex inside a mature and committed relationship is natural and beautiful.