How does the beginning of my resume' look/sound so far?

Question

I am applying for a sales assitant. Researched on line and according to them these new titles are acceptable on the resume'. I would appreciate some constructive feed back. Thanks in advance.

Objective

To work with, compliment and assist with a team and or partner to achieve the same sales goals. Forge new employment whereas we compliment one another’s integrity and accountability.


Career Highlights / Qualifications

Two consecutive years I lead two different teams; with no previous sales experience to sales that doubled the previous years. The wholesaler gave recognition to the store in which I lead, an “Elite Dealership Award” and informed us the store is number one in the northern part of the state.

I appreciate this constructive feed back. Thank you for your new ideas and corrections.

I have really gotten constructive feeback from all of you. Since I have not written one in years and I need in very soon...I am going to have a professional write it. Thank you all for your consideration.

Answer 1

I hope you don't take this the wrong way - I really mean well - but your objective is far too "wordy" and doesn't really say a whole lot. Quite frankly, it looks like it was pulled out of some sort of legal statement.

Again, no offense, just trying to help you out.

Remember, a resume is designed to do one thing. Get you an interview. Putting yourself in the employer's shoes, ask, "Would I be interested in hiring this person?"

But honestly, I think it's almost impossible to write a good objective statement. I know I never have been able to. The fact is, it just doesn't make sense to start out a resume - an attempt to convince the employer to hire you - with what YOU want. If you really want to get hired, you're going to have to think about what the EMPLOYER wants.

An excellent alternative to an objective statement is a "summary" statement. This is basically a short section where, in simple terms, you explain who you are and what benefit you can provide to the employer. Summaries are becoming used more and more - so you'll be able to find some other info on the web.


I wish you the best,
Jonathan Bostrom

http://www.easierjobsearch.com



.

Answer 2

A couple suggested edits - note spelling changes e.g. compliment means to praise, complement means to complete :

Objective

To work with, complement and assist a team and or partner to achieve or surpass sales goals.

Career Highlights / Qualifications

For two consecutive years I led two different teams, with no previous sales experience, to sales that doubled the previous years. The wholesaler gave recognition to the store in which I led, an “Elite Dealership Award” and informed us the store is number one in the northern part of the state.

Answer 3

Sounds good! But on objective, maybe you should say "To utilize my experience in sales and leadership to gain full time (or permanent?) employment in a professional and challenging atmosphere. To form an employment partnership where I would assist and compliment my employer by working with or leading a team that meets and exceeds shared sales goals. I wish to work for an employer who shares common values such as integrity, accountability, and high performance standards. Sorry to go on, just some ideas, it sounds very good-just make sure you put in the objective somewhere that you wish to gain full time employment. If that is your main goal, right?? I wouldn't stress that you had no prior experience before your two years that sound like great experience-maybe talk it over at the interview if you wish-your trying to sell yourself, so to speak, to get that interview right now. Maybe stress-"My sales team doubled the previous years sales-or however you say it. You want to say you were a Leader-but sound more like a "team player" Everyone likes a team player, right? Good luck to you and Good Job!

Answer 4

Compliment: (noun), as in "I compliment you on your resume."
Complement (verb): To have a salad that 'complements' the steak dinner.

You need the verb tense in your resume.

Under objective: 'forge new employment', doesn't quite sound right for a job, sounds like you're making horseshoes or something...ok, how about:

To work with, complement or assist in a team environment or partnership to achieve a common ground by forging new ideas that inspire one another's integrity and accountability.

Also, "lead" means the stuff inside a pencil or gasoline, "led" means to the past tense of lead - that is pronounced 'leed'

When speaking about your qualifications and highlights, no one wants to read a 'dry' resume. In other words, perk it up by telling HOW you did something. Show figures if appropriate or percentages if using a generalization of a financial gain.

Good luck with your job search.

Answer 5

This is a difficult one to answer, but I'll try :) I suggest writing about interests that may relate to performing in ANY way, for example: playing a musical instrument or taking dance lessons. Any school shows she's been involved with, even as chorus would help, too. And, of course, the height, hair colour, eye colour things as well. I hope that helped even a little bit - as I said, it's a difficult question to answer, but the auditioners will understand, as it's very difficult to get lots of experience at such a young age. Good luck to your daughter, and I hope it all goes well!

Answer 6

That sounds really good and professional. I have been in accounting for 12 years and have been through 2 downsizings so my resume has had to be upgraded substantially for the new decade.

http://www.moreinfo247.com/9521604/FREE
http://www.nowlivelife.com

Answer 7

If I were the Hiring Manager reading your resume I would probably disregard it. Please do not feel offended but this is what I think you should do. Find someone who knows how to write EFFECTIVE resumes to help you.

Peace and every blessing!